CH917
Added 2025-08-10 13:59:06 +0000 UTCHe did his best to keep a careful eye on everyone as Quin opened her portals, watching them with his various senses as well as connect, stretched out as far as it could go to keep track of all they thought and felt, finding himself doing well enough so far.
None of them felt openly hostile having him as their leader, though a few were curious about him too. There were a few small flashes of recognition from a couple he’d copied skills from in the past but overall, the biggest issue any had was the fact they didn’t recognize him, something they all found odd considering their own high standings in the guild and was made all the more so when they considered the importance of their mission. They were off to search for one of the world’s third tiers, a task of unequal value, how could the role of leading them not fall on a more widely known, accomplished adventurer?
And yet, despite those few misgivings, they were all professional despite that. While not having the sort of discipline that would be forced into any member of the planet’s different militaries, they were valued members of the guild and while both first and second ranks had to do with whether they held awakened skills, getting to the third rank demanded at least a bit of professionality that Ben hadn’t always gotten to witness in anyone ranked fourth or lower. They had all been brought on for a specific job, and while there was a risk of disobedience from them, so long as he properly explained why they’d be doing certain things, he could count on them to act appropriately.
With a few even already on his side after his brief introduction. While he hadn’t outright said it, some had caught on by how he’d titled himself that he might have been a third tier, albeit, one they hadn’t heard of before, and distributing his mana and buff bracelets to all who hadn’t already been given one had been a good look as well, immediately showing the worth of the action as they went.
While not as smooth as some cohesive group used to marching in formation, they were all fast enough going from one portal to the next as their space mage opened them that they arrived at the fourth site just below the thirty-minute mark, a far better time than any of them had initially expected, even if that left the issue of how much there was still to go.
It was anywhere between there and the sixth site that Foast had been sent to track from that he’d gone missing and with no more information than that; it meant they’d need to walk it to give their trackers any hope of finding anything, with the only option being to start there.
“Alright, this is the last confirmed location of the true shifter Foast. For now, do your best to find whatever signs of him you can, but if you have any specific questions about what you might be looking for, go to Peac since he’s the one most familiar with who we’re looking for among us. Anyone who’s not specialized in tracking, for now stay in place. It’s going to be hard enough to follow the path of a shapeshifter already, we don’t need to make it even more complicated for them by disturbing the rest of the scene by looking around if we’ve got nothing to contribute, understood?”
He got agreement through both yeses and nods as their four trackers began to move, looking around the area and talking amongst themselves while Ben observed it too, both through his senses along with everyone else's as he took it all in, seeing the destruction that was left behind.
No bodies were present from whenever it had happened but a long enough time in the woods was always going to ensure that was the case, scavengers that had tagged along during the exodus of hundreds of different planets filling those lands ensuring there was always something to find to be to their taste but despite that and the effects of time wearing it away, signs of the battle that took place were still there. Burn marks from magic, stone shaped in ways that would never be found in nature, trees broken down, and slash marks speaking of weapons. Even if it was slowly being weathered away in whatever days or weeks it had been since it had happened, judging from the total area of damage he was seeing, it was enough to make estimates about how many had been involved.
Fifty to a hundred from the looks of it, going to depend on skill level but the greater issue is that I can’t tell how many would be from whatever expedition was sent out here compared to how many demons they had to have faced but if it was a contender, it might have only been one. I’ll have to ask for clarification later. Other than that… No survivors from it or any other site. I suppose if there had been, then both me and Foast would have been given more information to work off of. Oh god, since I’m in charge, I’m responsible for these people’s lives, aren’t I? God damn, not a fan of that.
He was sure they were all assigned for the job because they were equally powerful and competent, but he still didn’t want anyone dying under his watch, something that was all too possible with the little bit of information he held. There was no telling what could go wrong if they found Foast, nor any way to know what sacrifices might need to be made to save the third tier. As he looked around, having seen into their memories of the lives they had waiting for them, could he in good conscience sacrifice any one of them to save one life?
Supposedly it would be worth it, he knew most there understood that too, but just the thought left a foul taste in his mouth that only grew worse when the four trackers walked over, their expressions telling him enough.
“No luck then?” He asked, with one stepping forward to answer.
“Not exactly. We believe we’d found him based on a few clues that would suggest a creature had been changing its shape, but the issue is the final one. Something capable of flight, if his journey to the next location was in the skies then finding him is going to be all but impossible.”
Incredible. Just freaking fantastic.
“Okay,” he said, trying to keep the disappointment from his face. “This is going to change things just a bit then. Quin, you’ll be taking us to the next point where the trackers will begin searching again, if we don’t find any new signs of Foast then we’ll come back and do a proper search of the woods between here and there but if we do find any, we’ll know we can keep going and either follow them or, assuming he’s flown off again, do the same thing for the sixth site.”
And hope he didn’t fly off from there because if he did, who knows what direction he might have gone off in?
Just the thought made him want to pinch his brow as he was left wondering how long they could be out there searching if he had flown off again but he felt general agreement for the plan from the minds of the others and that was enough for him and at the very least, cutting out the need to walk between the sites would reduce their time out there if Foast really had made it to the last one, meaning they just needed to see where he’d ultimately made it and with their space mage opening a new portal they were off, ready to see whatever the next location had in store.
Author’s note
Okay, from this chapter I’m renewing my efforts to try and fix some of my common grammar mistakes so bear with me for a bit because it’s a pain in the butt. Obviously, I’ve had some capitalization issues which are easy enough to fix but commas are going to be the death of me. One very well written article on them I read said there’s 26 different ways to use commas in english and I’m seeing a frankly unreasonable amount of conflicting information on when and where to use them. For example, in the earlier parts of this story I used to use them a lot more but stopped when I read an article telling me I was using them wrong but now that I’m trying to get better with them I’m reading a lot of things telling me I might have been using them correctly in some of the areas I stopped and long story short, I’m not a fan but I’m doing my best to figure them out, hopefully with an end result that gives you all a better reading experience in the process.
Comments
Yeah, this is my biggest gripe with their writing. The run-on sentences get really tiring to read and comprehend.
xXMetrinSlerbaXx
2025-09-09 16:52:35 +0000 UTCagreed
funktorial
2025-08-12 15:32:29 +0000 UTCThe best way to use commas, is in the way you envision sentences being read or said. If there is a pause, use a comma, if not, then don't. There are so many ways of using commas, that at this point, there is no right or wrong way (other than gross misuse)
Ben Word
2025-08-11 04:24:30 +0000 UTCWhat happened to Abel?
justin
2025-08-11 01:44:32 +0000 UTCHi, i'm really proud of you for doing what you can to improve! I love your writing style, although you do have a noticeably strong tendency to make run-on sentences. An ironic example is your final 100 word sentence : "For example, in the earlier parts of this story I used to use them a lot more but stopped when I read an article telling me I was using them wrong but now that I’m trying to get better with them I’m reading a lot of things telling me I might have been using them correctly in some of the areas I stopped and long story short, I’m not a fan but I’m doing my best to figure them out, hopefully with an end result that gives you all a better reading experience in the process. " A trick to these is to replace some of the "but"s & "and"s with a hard stop and see if it works. Saying it out loud also helps find where punctuation and commas might fit
KeyDrTrident
2025-08-10 21:52:58 +0000 UTCYeah, commas are a real pain. Also, thanks for the chapter, the next few are going to be pretty interesting.
Lionheart Copperhead
2025-08-10 20:40:20 +0000 UTCGood luck with the commas! When someone addresses the addressee with their form of address, there should be a comma where possible between the form of address and the rest of the sentence. Example: 'Everybody, move!' Rather than 'Everybody move!'. If simply speaking of someone else there's often no need for extra commas. Example: 'We need Joshua to get over here.' That is fine. If Joshua is the one being addressed, it'd be more like 'We need you, Joshua, get over here.' Yeah... commas can be weird.
Napalm078
2025-08-10 19:33:13 +0000 UTC"With a few even already on his side after his brief introduction." *A few were even already on
Napalm078
2025-08-10 19:32:54 +0000 UTCTftc
Andrew Nichols
2025-08-10 18:50:01 +0000 UTCI can agree with this. I really like the story. Having less frequent releases with longer chapter lengths would be nice.
TheLostGolem
2025-08-10 17:26:32 +0000 UTCTFCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC
Rain
2025-08-10 17:23:06 +0000 UTCThe general rules for commas that I was taught in school growing up is that they should be used for a short pause, in lists, and for dialogue. You're generally using them correctly, but you’re definitely not using enough periods. It feels like 90% of your paragraphs are giant run-on sentences, and comes across as stream of consciousness rambling. Example: No bodies were present from whenever it had happened but a long enough time in the woods was always going to ensure that was the case, scavengers that had tagged along during the exodus of hundreds of different planets filling those lands ensuring there was always something to find to be to their taste but despite that and the effects of time wearing it away, signs of the battle that took place were still there. Burn marks from magic, stone shaped in ways that would never be found in nature, trees broken down, and slash marks speaking of weapons. Even if it was slowly being weathered away in whatever days or weeks it had been since it had happened, judging from the total area of damage he was seeing, it was enough to make estimates about how many had been involved. Edit suggestion for better flow: No bodies were present from whenever it had happened, but a long enough time in the woods was always going to ensure that was the case. Scavengers had tagged along during the exodus of hundreds of different planets filling those lands, ensuring there was always something to find to be to their taste, but despite that and the effects of time wearing it away, signs of the battle that took place were still there. Burn marks from magic, stone shaped in ways that would never be found in nature, trees broken down, and slash marks speaking of weapons. Even if it was slowly being weathered away in whatever days or weeks it had been since it had happened, judging from the total area of damage he was seeing, it was enough to make estimates about how many had been involved. It's a small change, but personally, I feel less mentally out of breath with it broken up in such a way. Keep in mind, I'm American, and I've got no idea how grammar is taught in other countries, so experience may vary. Something to consider.
Hoogleman
2025-08-10 16:28:18 +0000 UTCI want to preface this by saying I've really enjoyed Chaotic Craftsman and have been following it for a while now. However, as important as commas can be in writing, I think you'd be better served by focusing on run-on sentences. I've noticed you tend to have entire paragraphs that are just one long sentence with a dozen conjunctions thrown in. I personally find that more challenging to decipher than a missing or misplaced comma.
Hunter Armstrong
2025-08-10 15:39:00 +0000 UTCI dont care much about commas, I do care about chapter lenght and pacing. They are 50% to 110% shorter (1300 words avg) than they were 2 years ago (2500 words avg) It makes the pacing difficult. I'd rather have chapters less frequently with more content, the fragments of story are getting a weird pacing, too short to develop the idea they hold, segmenting the long term arc in too many small pieces. TYFTC
Laurent Jerry
2025-08-10 14:41:22 +0000 UTCThanks I was always told a comma goes where you would normally stop to take a breath before continuing for example "I want to play with my friends, in the park." Hope that helps also I wanted to know your opinion I have dyslexia and I really enjoy your novel I use a reading assistant to turn text into speech but I need to highlight and copy your text then paced into the assistant text bar I do not save any of your work down and use it purely for enjoyment and for listening instead of reading a wanted to know if they'd okay with you and if not what can i do to be able to audiofi novels in the future without issues
Steven Parkinson
2025-08-10 14:38:29 +0000 UTCCommas always trip me up too.
TheCrazyDuck
2025-08-10 14:18:00 +0000 UTCIf he awakens false ben, then he will be able to grant the false ben skill when he becomes a god. Sounds like a nightmare situation if you ask me because he can take over his enemy's mind instead of throwing them into the hells
TBONEMAN
2025-08-10 14:12:02 +0000 UTCLol isn't it a hassle when English experts have a disagreement of when to use "Proper" English punctuation. xD I feel for you. It reads well regardless so no skin off my nose
Gaxlii
2025-08-10 14:07:58 +0000 UTCAs much as I love the clear pacing that commas give, the "rules" behind them can be fuzzier than peaches and kittens...
Garron Chalmers
2025-08-10 14:05:54 +0000 UTCTFTC
CataFlan
2025-08-10 14:05:49 +0000 UTC