PPE Required
Added 2021-06-03 01:10:31 +0000 UTCBeeps
Comments
I’m in total agreement with Beeps, there has been a pile of paperwork on my desk that I’ve been avoiding for at least a week now.
Turjas
2021-06-23 02:45:32 +0000 UTCBut what would be the tagline? "Applied Dildonics - we do it for the science!"? "Applied Dildonics - we really put the science in it!"?
Dimitar Bounov
2021-06-08 20:01:54 +0000 UTCWhat, no "Applied Dildonics" shirt? If censorship or modesty is an issue, how about "Applied D-donics"?
Dancing on the Edge of Sanity
2021-06-05 12:40:48 +0000 UTCOK, that's fucking hilarious. Pintsize will be so jealous of his former chassis.
Clifton Royston
2021-06-05 08:04:19 +0000 UTCSpeaking of applied Dildonics, check out Something Positive for a tie-in to this week's plot.
Dave Van Domelen
2021-06-05 04:38:06 +0000 UTCHuh. I wonder if the one Melon found and "rescued" is an escaped prototype? Also "Applied Dildonics: you wouldn't believe what they let you put on business cards!" "Applied Dildonics: pounding them so you know they can take it!" "Applied Dildonics: we're hard on the hard-ons!" "Applied Dildonics: we harm dildos so they won't harm you" "Applied Dildonics: guaranteeing** the only explosion you will experience is an orgasmic one!" ** provided you fun time doesn't include a 2-ton hydraulic press and AXE body spray
JourneymanWizard
2021-06-05 03:34:30 +0000 UTCand the 20 minute new hire/yearly video you must watch so the outsourced HR can check that box
Jim Feldman
2021-06-04 19:46:33 +0000 UTCTotes agree. I just came on to post that very thing. Well done good sir!
Doc Gumby
2021-06-04 03:45:04 +0000 UTCAlso, Applied Dildonics with a vague dildo logo would make a great tshirt. LOL
Kuragari
2021-06-03 21:02:58 +0000 UTCI'm just imagining a poster on the wall "The Dildos and Dildon'ts of Workplace Safety"
Kuragari
2021-06-03 21:01:56 +0000 UTCI completely forgot about that one
Thomas Halpin
2021-06-03 17:35:00 +0000 UTCIt's been established that in the QC universe there are sex toys with non-euclidean geometry that can touch places that don't exist (https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1380). So it's not surprising that teams of physicists and mathematicians are involved.
Douglas E. Smith
2021-06-03 16:02:15 +0000 UTC"Come with me, and you'll be/ In a world of robo-masturbation...."
Dean Reilly
2021-06-03 11:28:19 +0000 UTCBeeps is a sweetie, but she shouldn't be allowed out without an accompanying adult.
Mark
2021-06-03 09:44:38 +0000 UTC"There's an invisible emu loose at the applied dildonics factory." "Man, this f'ing town."
Stephen Wells
2021-06-03 09:22:13 +0000 UTCI want Claire to solve Beeps' paperwork issues and get hired to do that.
Stephen Wells
2021-06-03 09:16:54 +0000 UTCone job I had in the past was collating data on safety inspections to meet OSHA regulations. At the end of the year I had a binder 4" thick. And that was just one small part of my job. I probably deforested a few square miles.
Tim Williams
2021-06-03 06:57:29 +0000 UTCI can see it now. They will even get to meet the owner, Willie Wanker
Todd Ellner
2021-06-03 06:24:17 +0000 UTCBeeps no!
Reinder Dijkhuis
2021-06-03 06:00:14 +0000 UTCBeeps needs to be in a Willy Wonka costume for the full effect.
Dean Reilly
2021-06-03 05:52:31 +0000 UTCIt's a dildo factory where they already FILLED that position! :-P
Anders Rapp
2021-06-03 05:41:14 +0000 UTCI used to work for Applied Materials, and I think Applied Dildonics would have made a MUCH better business card.
Sleepy John
2021-06-03 05:26:05 +0000 UTCThere are so many rearrangements of those last four words that also make sense!
Brooks Moses
2021-06-03 04:59:47 +0000 UTCNot that, so much as Claire accidentally bumping the lever that sets the conveyor to high speed as she tries to get them all neatly into their cartons
Jon Guyer
2021-06-03 04:37:15 +0000 UTCPlay your cards right and there's a free sex toy in it for you.
Bagge
2021-06-03 04:14:00 +0000 UTCJust seeing Beepatrice again makes me happy.
Elf Sternberg
2021-06-03 04:02:52 +0000 UTCPintsize is going to be so mad he didn't go.
Justin Alexander
2021-06-03 03:53:20 +0000 UTCQuestionable Content; the webcomic that is its own XXX parody.
Thomas A. Dennis
2021-06-03 03:50:55 +0000 UTCI'm really wondering if we'll know... My money is on either Melon, or Yay... cause Yay working in a dildo testing facility would be fucking hilarious!!
Shawn K. Younkin
2021-06-03 03:24:19 +0000 UTCqDot needs a cameo as Chief Scientist.
Emma Humphries
2021-06-03 03:20:47 +0000 UTCThank you for choosing us! Just before we enter the factory floor, I have to go through a few safety dildos and dildon'ts hahaha! [Haunted look]
Simon Green
2021-06-03 03:01:32 +0000 UTCTake the tour Claire!
drone r0m-3
2021-06-03 02:33:17 +0000 UTCI'm just going to leve this one here for everyone that is enjoying that company name: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teledildonics
Sammitch
2021-06-03 02:21:16 +0000 UTCMore like "unlimited" amirite?
Alacrity Fitzhugh
2021-06-03 02:14:45 +0000 UTCI'VE BEEN ON THAT TOUR! THERE WERE SO MANY DONGS I THOUGHT I WAS BACK AT DISNEYLAND!
Yelling Bird
2021-06-03 02:06:50 +0000 UTCYou’re missing out if you don’t sell Applied Dildonics Ltd t-shirts. Especially for pride month.
Julia Allen-Hesse
2021-06-03 02:03:58 +0000 UTCShe might have got the job if she hadn't stopped to help Pintsize. No good deed goes unpunished.
Andrew Mitchell
2021-06-03 01:47:30 +0000 UTCI get the sense that Applied Dildonics should really hire Claire. I'm not even sure for which job in particular, but competent, together people are fairly hard to find, so if one comes to your door you should really default to checking if you have a job for them.
Yonatan Zunger
2021-06-03 01:42:34 +0000 UTCYou won't last 3 minutes. :P
Summer Sudbrink
2021-06-03 01:40:02 +0000 UTCApplied Dildonics Limited might be the best name of a business ever.
Will Weaver
2021-06-03 01:39:22 +0000 UTCThere was stiff competition for that job. It's a hard job to get. Hard to believe the lengths some would go for the job. Thank you—I'll be here all week.
Jeff Norman
2021-06-03 01:36:30 +0000 UTCDILDOS SO DENSE THEY CAN CREATE THEIR OWN SPACE AND TIME CONTINUUMS... equipped with 3 different vibration settings for your pleasure!
Shawn K. Younkin
2021-06-03 01:29:14 +0000 UTCCrushbot got the job. Most of Beeps' paperwork involves special ordering a reinforced desk and keyboard.
Dean Reilly
2021-06-03 01:26:59 +0000 UTCI can glom Applied Dildonics, but theoretical dildonics is… ???
A. J. Alfieri-Crispin
2021-06-03 01:25:43 +0000 UTCBeeps, sweetie, you gotta get better at doing paperwork!
Grace Kieser
2021-06-03 01:25:27 +0000 UTCShot in the dark, Claire probably has a relatively unique perspective on dildos?
Tinwhisker
2021-06-03 01:24:06 +0000 UTCBig Wangers INC is a real company
Levitikan
2021-06-03 01:22:29 +0000 UTCI'm sensing Beeps could use the help of a good librarian.
TV4Fun
2021-06-03 01:22:10 +0000 UTCMaybe Claire can get a job as Beep's assistant?
Michael Boettger
2021-06-03 01:21:15 +0000 UTCApplied Dildonics, Ltd. We do it FOR SCIENCE! (and WITH SCIENCE!)
Douglas E. Smith
2021-06-03 01:21:07 +0000 UTCDon't lose hope, Claire. Something good is coming soon.
Michael Boettger
2021-06-03 01:19:54 +0000 UTCJust printing out that paperwork was a major accomplishment
Rich Holmes
2021-06-03 01:17:29 +0000 UTCIt sounds more like a subsidiary of Aperture Science. Turn lemons into exploding dildos.
Miyaa
2021-06-03 01:16:39 +0000 UTCHeh, “entry”
Eric Sieck
2021-06-03 01:16:38 +0000 UTCApplied Dildonics Ltd....that sounds a lot more professional and legitimate than I was expecting. Like 'Big Wangers, INC' or something.
Anthony Gaglianese
2021-06-03 01:14:58 +0000 UTCYou weren't the only one thinking it.
Ron Edens
2021-06-03 01:14:45 +0000 UTCI wonder who filled the position, and if there isn’t another position Claire could find there.
Andrea Andrew
2021-06-03 01:14:03 +0000 UTC> Applied Dildonics Umm, are they looking for a software engineer by any chance? I'd do it just for the resume entry.
Stephen B.
2021-06-03 01:14:01 +0000 UTCApplied Dildonics Ltd. A subsidiary of Black Mesa...
Ted Van Roekel
2021-06-03 01:13:54 +0000 UTCThe position has just been... Filled... I'll show myself out
Leonardo Taglialegne
2021-06-03 01:13:28 +0000 UTCNow I want Beeps to give Claire that factory tour.
Miyaa
2021-06-03 01:12:48 +0000 UTCJeph, did you set up this story arc just to draw a bunch of dildos on a conveyor belt?
LorettaYoungSilks
2021-06-03 01:12:47 +0000 UTC
