Gotta Go Fast

The marriage of Patrick Fitzwilliam and William Fitzpatrick? (Old old joke)

Todd Ellner

the real twist is that they were married all along. the hatred was only to boost both influencers.

Absentia

Please fucking tell me that they get married one day is an enemy-turned-lovers twist.

Bex

THAT'S GREAT! DO YOU HAVE A POOL!?

Yelling Bird

If Marigold is really that rich, skip the Mario pool and get the Princess Daisy cruise ship/yacht from I think Mario Kart Double Dash.

Miyaa

@KCKittysnores The rage/enemy/apology/make-up sex must be absolutely fabulous.

Miyaa

I question their decency

Matthew Foweraker

Hanners has always been very quiet about being in the same situation (her parents are probably two of the wealthiest people on the planet) so it'll be interesting, and possibly whole-strip-changing, if this becomes general knowledge. I used to be a well paid engineer (before I caught the public service bug) and remember what it was like suggesting places to eat that my friends had to tell me they couldn't afford (and wouldn't let me pay). That's awkward enough - but at the kind of money it seems we're talking about here it become potentially even worse. With that kind of money you could pay off someone's student debt, give them a deposit to buy an apartment, buy their business (but still let them run it) or just pay someone to work for you (imagine May as Marigold's PA). There's almost more social stigma about taking money off people as there is in being poor in the first place so, if it becomes generally known, this could well be painful for Marigold.

David Durant

For once… I’m proud of you, @Yelling Bird.

Miyaa

Hannelore's family lives in a completely different world, where the money a streamer makes is a mere rounding error. But Hanners lives on her own, in a small apartment, and she works at a coffee shop. So in her own right, she's basically earning minimum wage. Looking at it from that scale, back when I was earning a mere $25 an hour writing software as a freelance (a horrible experience I will never repeat), I got a college grant check for $10,000 and let out a surprise swear word... But for Marigold to freak out on this level means she must have gotten life changing money - like a signing bonus in the six figures, at least. To throw a number on it, I imagine that Twitch sent her a check for $250,000 to seal an exclusive contract....

Tom wilson

I'm curious what amount of money Hannelore considers to be "a lot of money" that a streamer could earn. I have to assume that living on earth and travelling has given her a better appreciation for the differences between "influence global morality" kinds of money that she grew up with compared to "an internet-celebrity embarrassment of riches" pile.

AcheronYYC

Just occurred to me that Hanners is probably uniquely able to understand that issue. For while the reasons may differ, she is also really wealthy but wants a simple life.

Peter Jensen

This is one of those things that sounds too specific not to be true

Olivier Laroche

Hanners and Marigold comics always enjoy seeing.

Akashimo Hakubi

Thus embittering Hayden forever... or at least until they meet in person without knowing each other, and fall in love, all the while not knowing each is the other’s nemesis.

KCkittysnores

Headcanon accepted.

KCkittysnores

Millions of people (easily) accept the sweat off other peoples brows on a daily basis.

Michael Voorhis

*looks at Sonic-shaped pools* "Huh, neat..."

Leak

Trying to be a charity is a *lot* of work. And require some skills that you may not have. The easy way out is to donate everything to a trusted charity, but if you want to do it yourself you will destroy the life of quite a bit of people, including possibly your own. It's a ton of personality, and it's the kind of position where you're actively under attack by malicious people.

Frederick Ohlmann

I can’t speak for myself, but my wife did inherit a significant amount of money. A “never had a mortgage repayment “amount of money. There is a lot of guilt involved if you have any empathy or compassion at all. And there is a lot of pressure not to waste something you don’t feel that you earned. Then run off a lot of people out there who don’t have enough, and in this particular case some of them have probably contributed to this money pile. How can a decent person easily accept, note the easily, the sweat of another person’s brow? Bear in mind that she probably has had to worry about money, meaning she understands what it’s worth, unlike many wealthy folk and so doesn’t want to be seen to be wasting what other people might actually need and the fact that she’s getting it for doing something that she probably doesn’t actually considered to be a job, the flaw too many creative types fall into, and it could create a lot of guilt pressure. In my opinion what she needs to be doing is making sure she’s putting enough by because streaming is never going to be a permanent career and eventually she is going to need that money while she either retires or find something else to do with her life. I’m not trying to say anything about the original poster here because of course fantasy and reality are different things. I too used to fantasise about what will be like to have a significant chunk of change and even being married to someone with one is an incredibly different experience.

Matthew Foweraker

I'm genuinely baffled. Really. There's no limit to my imagination when it comes to all the things I would do with more money (help family and friends, then help everyone else through various means). Anyone who thinks money is only for extravagant luxuries has maybe never had to worry about money? I dunno, really confused.

I JIZZED IN BOTH OF THEIR POOLS!

Yelling Bird

Give them six months.

Dean Reilly

Virtually indistinguishable except virtually, but only because Tucker got the sonic_daddy username first. Hayden had to go with son1c_daddy.

I read it as "they've been engaged" and gasped gleefully for a sec, then I read the rest of the sentence. Still good but not "engaged Sonic Pool nerds."

JoeTheCynic

SKULLMASTER, MASTER OF SKULLS DEMANDS A SKULLMASTER, MASTER OF SKULLS T-SHIRT BE CREATED FIRST!

Hugh Eckert

i'd rather have a pool shaped like Shadow the hedgehog

Marty BlackEagle

if I've learned one thing in my life it's never to trust a Hayden or a Tucker or a *-field

Onedavewreckingcrew

When do we get a tshirt with just that Coffee of Doom skull on it? 🔥

bighairmonkey

So, they're ringers?

Sleepy John

Hanners is hannering good

Bagge

Honestly this is financial goals: make enough to pay bills without worry, indulge now and again (ie: Steam sales and maybe saving up for a trip or two), and set up savings. Anything left - there's charities, family I could repay, or fundraisers and the like.

Cole Blackblood

The white would be an island with a hot tub for the pupil. A little bridge across the eyes would make it accessible without having to get in the pool.

Adam Abbott

It's...really sad this moderate standard of living is such an unobtainable dream nowadays. I make a frankly absurd amount of dollars per hour at my current job, but I would have to almost double it to afford a moderately sized house that isn't a trash heap where I live (San Jose).

Jaron Mortimer

It's their evil twin, Field HaydenTuckerFieldField III.

Dean Reilly

Marigold's so right to want to keep her life, and Hanners is so right to help with a plan. When I started making real money as an engineer, I kept my standard of living the same, made a little 'party & hobby fund', then socked the rest away in savings. Didn't even get a new car. Three years after graduation I bought a house. In a good San Diego neighborhood. Furnished it with good stuff (solid, not glitzy). Still kept my standard of living the same. Still kept saving. It's now nearly 40 years later. I could retire tomorrow and still have exactly the same standard of living. Forever. But I'll keep working, because that's the life I want. Though I do plan to take way more vacations.

BobC

And lined with human teeth.

Jeremy

they must wear bowties on stream

darklion

And somewhere in the internet #teamtucker and #teamhayden were born...though no one knows why...

Kenneth

plot twist: ones' shaped like original Sonic; one's shaped like the original movie Sonic.

Peter McDevitt

First you set up investments so you'll have a nice comfortable income no matter what. Once that's done you pick a charity and FLOOD THEM WITH MONEY.

Ted Van Roekel

Hello. My name is Field Haydentucker. You accused my father of misappropriating funds from the Scarsdale Country Club. Prepare to be snubbed!

Matt Grayson

I’m hoping Hanners will explain that money isn’t evil, it’s a tool. More money means you can also do more of certain types of good.

LaPrimaNerda (Sarah Davis)

Well shit, I didn't know I needed a pool like that until now. Thanks a lot. 😑

Timothy Roller

Go Marigold! Go!!!!!!!!!!!

You take that back! They look nothing like each other, and Hayden is obviously the best! ... or is that Tucker?

Chuck Dee

Set up a foundation? Donate to the AI rights foundation that Roko kinda, sorta, heads(Momo and May might appreciate that). Fund a chair at Smif? The list is endless.

Michael Boettger

OMG those are the whitest names ever. Even more than Winklevoss.

Auros Harman

Okay a Sonic pool if it's shaped like his entire body sounds dumb, but one shaped like his head, like in some logos would be pretty legit. https://1000logos.net/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/sonic-new_logo.png

BioYuGi

But is there anyone with a Mario pool? :3

Wynn Donivan