Hello Nasty

My husband loves karaoke, and I spent most of my 20s either pregnant or breastfeeding, so I spent a significant amount of time in bars drinking nothing but soda or water. I can't imagine the gall of refusing to serve non-alcoholic drinks. I guess I'm technically a millennial though (born in 81).

I think in this case it's more about whether the person considers it an alcoholic beverage.

Technically it should be LESS than one half of one percent, that's the limit for something to be legally considered no longer an alcoholic beverage. Honestly she'd almost certainly be fine, a few tenths of a percent is actually about as much alcohol as you can find in an average carton of orange juice. It all just depends on how long it's been sitting on the shelf. But of course, staying on the safe side is always a good idea. So I wouldn't say she made the *wrong* decision.

George Wirth

It's not really about being poisoned from the chilis, but being harmed by reactions to the heat. People can have really bad reactions to things that are too spicy, such as asthma attacks. Then again some hot sauces have "waiver forms" that likely have less to do with liability and more to do with marketing. "Ooh, it's so hot you have to sign a waiver? I have to buy THAT stuff!"

George Wirth

I don't want to know how that was calculated OR, for that matter, where the bodies were buried.

sounds like the bar came pre-ruined to me

ysth

researchers have determined a 150-pound person would need to eat 3 pounds of dried and powdered capsaicin-rich peppers like the ghost pepper to die

ysth

In fact, I'd say it's the opposite of what she wants to tell her friends, since they already know she's dealing with a problem.

Jeffrey Nonken

At least the brand I drink as a sauna beer sometimes (Bavaria Wit non-alcoholic) really is non-alcoholic, as in it contains 0.0% of alcohol. The fact that it is also a decent wheat beer is a bit astonishing.

Janne Peltonen

I don't really have a taste for alcohol, and I generally go out with friends as the designated driver. I've never had an issue getting a soda at any bar, and often they give designated drivers soda and such for free.

Mooster

The issue isn't what she tells other. Faye isn't the type to care about that. This is more how she's dealing with her internal demons.

Mooster

It is if you're missing the taste as much as the active ingredient.

Nancie

There's a scene in Evening Shade where Michael Jeter's character charms a bartender by ordering a "Virgin White Russian."

Marc Moskowitz

I was at a bar where they refused to serve a Coke straight up because it was an “alcohol only bar.” As I was leaving, I heard one of the workers (possibly the owner) complain of millennials ruining his bar. No, not quite.

Miyaa

NA beer is a dangerous road for me. I have been sober awhile and the few times I have tried NA it just ends up making me want reg beer more. Not usually worth the trouble.

Aaron Schulz

You've never had good Birch Beer. Send me a PM with your address, and I'll send you a good bottle.

Get a glass. of orange juice and tell everyone it's a screwdriver. Or tomato juice and a Bloody Mary,

honestly i wish more bars would serve kombucha or something like it. i do drink alcohol, but sometimes you wanna go to a bar and not drink and you end up cradling a glass of water while everyone else has something delicious-looking.

JD

Hey, I happen to like birch beer (at least the carbonated version), but that's cause I'm from southern PA and it's kind of a regional thing there. Ginger beer, though.... I don't know how people can drink that stuff straight. Oy.

Michele Williams

I wouldn't trust non alcoholic beer. For that matter, I watch what mouthwash I use, to make sure it doesn't contain alcohol. And OTC medications for colds and so on as well.

I cannot speak for all non-alcoholic beer, but it's my understanding that when they started needing to report even alcohol content of just one proof, an awful lot of that stuff suddenly stopped being non-alcoholic. And then there's birch beer, which may not be alcoholic but it's just nasty, and anybody who was ever convinced to try a drink because of an ad that asserted it was never bitter wouldn't want anything to do with it. I'm not sure if Moxie should make this list or not.

Some Ed

Not with her recent burrito experience. Also, it depends on ones tolerance for spice and exactly how much ghost pepper is involved.

Some Ed

I'd say that nonalcoholic beer would probably be too similar, and would lead down bad paths.

Me too.

pilgrim3

It's not really non-alcoholic. It contains about as much to a bit more than kombucha.

Hedgie

I was wondering, what happened to non-alcoholic beer? That's a thing in America too, right?

I am a sober alcoholic. And I've been where Faye is, and her decision NOT to take chances was wise. Very wise. And ghost pepper water? Oh dear lord, just get me some caffeine and nothing but and I'm good. And ANY bar will serve plain coke, no booze. (Ask me how I know. :P )

Bubbles going for heat instead of tea? Ok. You have my attention.

Dylan T

Good for you Faye! You can do it!

Ted Van Roekel

Good for Faye on not taking any chances!

Nicholas Lopez

Well done, Faye

Bagge

Substitution is no solution.

midwestmutt

You've got to fight... for your right... to fart-tea!

Hugh Eckert

I didn't expect that ending. Love love love love it.

Joseph McGrath

Faye is being good, and I would totally try the ghost pepper water.

Diptych

I went to a beerfest once where one of the breweries also had a kombucha and were serving it in the waiting area before the general public was allowed in. I handed a cup to my girlfriend and said what it was, but she must of misheard me and drank about 4 ounces of it in one gulp followed by one of the most sour faces I have ever seen from her. She still blames me.

Alex Mullenix

I just bought three kombucha before sitting down to read this. TIMELY.

TMN

Sure, but Faye probably doesn't realize that, and the effect would be psychological anyway.

Carl Fink

That's like the same alcohol content as Welch's

Adam Friedlander

kombucha is gross >:[

Good for Faye for being smart and not taking any chances. She might as well try the ghost pepper though.

JD

Does Penelope still exist?

JD

Werewolves, I bet

Ting

Where's that waiver at? Sign me the fuck up.

Samantha Yeaman

TFW you just see the title and know you're in for a treat

Matt

Bubbles, there ain't gonna be no unicorns there...

BobC

Hi, Wil. Hopefully you & Penelope are still riding each other like your motorcycle.

Miyaa

❤️❤️❤️

Saketh Kasibatla

Wil continues to exist!

Seth Aaron Hershman has they she pronouns

Yaye, Faye!

Kenneth Carlile