SakeTami
majorkill
majorkill

patreon


Gimme ya thoughts fuckheads

This is scene 1 of 4 from an upcoming video I am working on on a series called "Hombrew Adventures" or some shit. I'm not a qualified writer, voice actor, director, animator or artist but I decided to give this my best shot.

If you have any feedback then let me know on discord, here or on YouTube - I would prefer you didn't share this

I am always looking for people to help me with this as well so if you have much skills with Adobe, sound editing or Voice acting then let me know on Discord and we can talk about it


Obviously inspired by TTS
Voice actors and artists that help me will be credited upon the full release. Everything is subject to change

Gimme ya thoughts fuckheads

Comments

just to let you know.... :)

Germany doesn't have a sense of humor, thus your autistic screeching is not worthy of consideration. For a Pilot episode this is fantastic, obviously there are improvements to be made but this is off to a hilarious start. It rustles my Jimmies that i can't make you regret each obnoxious word you entitled wanker. I don't know Majorkill personally but I would be willing to bet you would not dare be so rude if it was a face to face conversation.. little shits like you are cowards almost without exception. I think it is a very clear mark of character, the way people act when they can get away with it. from what i can see here, Jan Bendetson, you are on a similar level to The current Aussie PM; not quiet as disgusting as a pedo or rapist but still human garbage.

ok......guess your shit is ok

JB

just to let you know.....you have just one patreon supporter from germany ( me ).........and one mind syndicate gets the retard bonus over your dumb ass chanel over here. ( especially the douche thats drooles his name )

JB

Just give someone a fucking german english accent ( or russo lithuanian). Why is everybody having a douchbag accent from the incest isles ? Sorry throwing down 10 bucks makes me feel like i could demand somthing !!!!! Regarless, my stolen lunch money was semi well spent.

JB

Hahaha, Majorkill, make this happen!

You should add in a chapter called the "apathetic" marines. The history of them could be pretty cool if they kept trying to do stuff and realized that each time what they did didn't matter. They could save a world and then have the inquisition exterminatus it. They could get sent across the galaxy only to realize that it was a clerical error due to some bureaucrat filing the wrong paperwork and other stuff until they just stopped caring.

Oh cool, we have (more or less) the emperor's children, the world eaters, the imperial fists, the ultramarines, and, of course, the iron warriors.

Paul Stansel

Nice, that's a really well-written script.

Whissia

I FUCKING love this, please prioritize this!

Epic

Styx the Broken

That's fucking rank.

I love that the MEME marine is the only one who has any idea who the sixth marine is. aka spooky boys.

I like the bit about the Tau, and the Angry Marine. 10/10.

NotJacob

I think the pretty Marine could talk a bit more, but thats just a small one. Not much to criticize if there's not much to go off of. Maybe a small ambient background noise would be nice, y'know, like the Quior in the Empereors chamber (TTS). All other than that, looks and sounds reasonably well, good job so far lad. Am stoked for more

Nyx Nox

I can dig it. Really liking the reasonable marine, but thats me...heh angry bumble bee...colors are more like...Japanese "Murder Hornets" but thats a great line

William Elliott

Character interaction is nice so far and animation is better than the local benchmark (Mr Cusack), the Inquisitor could be more serious and you could make the ultramarine say some generic heroic leadership shit to contrast with the inquisitor only to get shutdown verbally or physically by the others for the memes

So i'm even more a retard than you probably when it comes to this (this is more of a joke comment i suppose) but i think it would be funny if everybody sounded like they were from the big lez show.

Cheers for the feedback man I appreciate it! I see what you mean about the Pretty Marine - went for gay vibes there which while I stand by, I agree that their lore does involve alot of Bishonen anime style and Ill be sure to include that into his character. The reasonable marine is my favourite character at the moment as he is basically the voice of the audience. Meme Marine I am happy with as they have this self aware insanity that I am keen to explore more and more. Sound work and camera work will be added upon until the end so i appreciate the feedback there. The Ultramarine is suppose to be the glue that throws it all together, I have some more for him down the track .

MajorKill

The intro in all honesty fell pretty flat for me. The Pretty Marine is just a one-note sex joke on repeat. He just seems like a lesser version of Alfabusa's Nude-stodes. Or just reusing Emperor's Children jokes. Isn't the basis of the Pretty Marines that they're a bunch of bishōnen anime guy, combined boy band members? Where is this excess horniness even coming from? The fact they're so mild-mannered would kind of make them the opposite of nymphos. If the aim is cliche jokes, then at least have them match the chapter, and not ripped from OTHER chapter memes. With Angry Marine, at first he just came off as an excuse to shout "faggot" and "fuck" into the mic, even though I know that's just part of the 'lore.' The Angry Marines seem like they're going to be the hardest to adapt to an audio medium. When we READ about them screaming at people, it's funny. Having to LISTEN to it seems like it would just get really grating on the ears. But, you made the smart choice of decreasing his volume for the rest of his lines. You handled the Reasonable Marine very well. It would have been easy to just make him a put-upon straight man that just gets dunked on by everyone. Like C-3PO. But you have him making insightful questions that help move the plot along, and although he doesn't condone the behavior of everyone around him, he's not acting helplessly flabbergasted. He's well aware that his Chapter stands alone from the rest of the Imperium. He even gets a joke in. The Meme Marine would have been easy to get stuck in a pitfall of predictable humor, but this guy piques my interest. Oddly enough, he seems to be the one most aware of what's going on, and despite his apparent insanity, accepts it. It's also refreshing to have a 40K character that's actually having FUN. Normally even the evil sadists, like Deldar and Chaos, still act overly dramatic. The fact that we can have it in a hero is just a bonus. I have ask though, why is there an Ultramarine in this? That seems the opposite of this whole setup. If it was an Iron Hands or Raven Guard member, I would at least interpret that as barely getting any attention in the lore, despite being Founding Chapters. There's also more you could do with sound and camera work. For instance, when the Angry Marine is moving around, his stomps should make a much louder sound than everyone else's. Also, how about when he's violently gesturing, the camera angle shifts with his shoulder line or Power Bat? Some of the jokes were really good, not just in concept, but the execution. Particularly the conversation around the Exterminatus Eye, and the entire explanation of tracking Fulgrim!

Dragon Turtle

amazing, top quality, make it happen

beauty mate, make it happen

Within 5 seconds I had to leave

Milo Panda

So I made the terrible mistake of opening this video next to my family

Milo Panda

10/10 would watch hate marines bash "the biggest faggot in the galaxy"

It's prtty wizard

That was awesome! I can't wait to see what is next. Nice touch on who's Primares and who isn't.

Yeager Bomb

Feedback

As long as a retributor astartes shows up, I think it'll be perfect

This was really great can't wait for more

Dalton Easterwood

Haha; uploaded to The Warp with a tracking link! Genius.

Pussy wouldn't scream every word the angry marine says

So far so good man, its entertaining and looks like you put a lot of work into it. No real critiques as I do not know the exact direction you want your massive load of creative juices to flow. But I'd watch a series of it. Keep up the awesome work as always and PM me If you'd like to bounce ideas.

If I were to grasp at straws for some constructive feedback it might be that the voices (especially the astartes) sound a bit soft, not harsh/autistic enough, but other than that it's pretty fucking great

Hahoolah

I like it autism is at peak effectiveness in this right here.

Looks good to me man it’s like TTS but with 100% more autism

Why the fuck is there a blue shit on my screen and haw cumes I can't see two of them but it's a great video

It’s pretty fucking amazing

Fukin genus man

Thanks I hate it. Jk it's fine mate


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