“Double Down”, page 61

When I said "they didnt know" I didn't mean as in they didn't know that Lucy wasnt doing well, I mean they didn't know *how* bad it was because she didn't tell anyone, again look at her family. We all feel ups and downs in life but when a friend is feeling down we don't all immediately jump to the suicide conclusion. Heck there are people myself included that battle with severe depression episodes for years that can easily fool those closest to us into thinking that its bad just not suicide bad.

Red Miso

so true

cottoncandy.x

Lucy: About what? Paulo: In that movie Congo, how do you tell the difference between the real monkey and the guy in a monkey suit? Lucy: ……….

SCD

Good point

Insomni-act

We saw her the moment Paulo left the room, because that's when Mike came in.

hazel

Two pages left, y'all. I'm not ready to move on. This has been an incredible chapter, showcasing the best qualities of BCB and elevating them. The art, the writing, the pacing, all are the finest they've ever been. We are quite lucky.

hazel

Exactly. Its mindless to say “he didn’t know” because he did- he knew. They all knew.

Paulo knew she was struggling, we know because of the leftover cake he brought her, but I think he at least thought he was helping, that he could be the one to save her, now that he realized he loves her. It's naïve and reckless, and it's also how rom-coms teach us to think.

hazel

I think she feels so dead that she won’t even cry unfortunately. It hurts how relatable this is- but it’s hopeful because I know now it gets better. High school and being a teenager sucks.

100% thought she was going to kill herself at any moment when reading these back then. My dude, I’m not throwing shade at Paulo but I’m still disappointed. Being a teenager sucks, but I think this whole interaction between these two characters can be a good lesson to it’s readers. Idk, but your reply kinda left a bad taste. They all knew she wasn’t okay. Their whole interaction before she says “let’s make out” screams I’m not okay. Maybe it’s just me- but if a close friend I’m also attracted too looks dead inside and tells me “let’s do it” I’m gonna be like “yeah you’re not in a good place.” I get Paulo struggles with his feelings here- he didn’t push himself onto her- but I’m still disappointed. This whole friend group is toxic for Lucy, I’m glad she’s finally separating from them. Paulo has been motivated by his feelings for her from day 1, and he can’t seem to put them aside for a minute. They aren’t good for one another.

This was at a time when Lucy wasn't feeling anythings; she was in her darkest period. Getting Paulo to make out with her did nothing. She still felt nothing. I doubt she cried. She was already dead inside.

Dave Ostroske

I bet Lucy starts crying in regret the moment he leaves the room.

Insomni-act

Can you really blame him the dudes like 16 with no life experience almost no one not even her family even knew how bad it was for her. Plus you gotta remember Lucy, while not intentionally leading Paulo on, was doing that. She wasn't saying or doing the things that she did with him as a way to tell him she needed help, she didn't want anyone to find out, whether that because of not wanting to herself or not feeling safe enough sadly isn't the point in this example. Tldr Paulo wasnt supposed to know so how would he know. We all know because we have insider knowledge as readers but let me ask did every single one of us, even with more knowledge than the characters, know that Lucy was doing so bad she would try to take her life before it happened?

Red Miso

Poor Lucy, goddamnit. She was planning on killing herself, so she thought “well might as well just let him do what he wants with me.” Because by this point she hates herself so much she is using her body to make someone else happy because she doesn’t think her own feelings matter. Younger readers, do not ever feel like you “owe” someone sex. Your body is yours, you don’t owe anyone your body. You do not have to “give in” or just “let them have one good time.” I’m really disappointed in Paulo. This is the epitome of how broken she is, giving herself away because she doesn’t care anymore. It’s why she knows now how bad this whole friend group is- leave them all behind and thrive girl. You’ve been through enough. I started reading this in high school and it gave me a lot of comfort. I related to Lucy in some ways, I was a pretty girl and I got guilt tripped by some guys for not liking them back. When I was really struggling and had my own mental health crisis like Lucy, one guy swooped in and pretended everything was okay and pressured me for sex. I was about to give in and say “fine, I don’t even care anymore.” When he realized that it was really wrong. We didn’t and I’m thankful for that. Paulo didn’t pressure her for anything here (I Think, we only know she was like “let’s make out”)- but I would have thought someone like him would realize she wasn’t in a good place. But, just one more shitty thing happening to Lucy before she jumps off the roof.

Well... Kinda understand to be honest in the grander scheme of things.

Runeru

literally no emotion,,,

Elisa

Aaaaaa

CasterXDesigns

yeah, you gotta. definitely. for sure gonna happen.

cottoncandy.x