Farmer Ichigo Chapter 5

Bleach parody: Patreon Reward

AN: This work is a work of fiction it's characters are fictional and are works of fantasy, as the creator of this parody, I can confirm they consent to all narrative and nsfw choices. This content is only for the purpose of entertainment and doesn't promote or condone any in real life actions, governments, policies, religions, groups, or life styles.

Chapter 4

Chapter 5 Harpie on the Farm

Yumichika a Peacock Harpie, he had wanted to join the interspecies exchange program, so he could see more of the beautiful world. However…

“Not beautiful enough!” One after another, his host families were deemed as unworthy. He was all about beauty, and had rather specific ideals for aesthetics.

Kisuke had tried so many different potential host families. He had found a pretty couple to look after him, but Yumichika didn’t find the home beautiful. His next family was the Omaeda family, they were very wealthy and had luxurious homes, but Yumichika found the host ugly and quickly flew off. The next one was a pop idol, he was hot and good looking but still Yumichika flew off. A model, a woman who ran a beauty supply store, a talent agent, all of them deemed “ugly”. It was different every time, but Yumichika was becoming a repeat offender and flight risk.

No matter how hard he tried he couldn’t find a good fit. Yumichika was becoming a headache, costing him tons and tons of paperwork. Each time he flew off he had a mountain dropped on his lap. He was getting really annoyed with this bird!

Just his luck the peacock harpie landed in Ichigo’s lap, he wasn’t about to miss this golden opportunity. Fixing Ichigo’s truck was a small price to pay. Kisuke got a rush on the paperwork, to get the “fabulous” monster out of his hair. ‘Will he be okay on a farm?’ It was hard to imagine Yumichika working on a farm of all things. ‘He wanted to be with Ichigo...so I’m sure he’ll be able to handle it.’

-x-

Renji was trying to be on his best behavior, especially since he wrecked Ichigo’s truck. Even with it getting fixed it was still his fault it happened in the first place. So he was working hard in the field.

The work wasn’t bothering him so much as…

The harpie whistling as he lounged in a chair.

“Ugh, why aren’t you working?!” Renji snapped.

“I am working.” Renji eyed him up and down. “I’m working on my tan, staying beautiful is a lot of work.”

“Why don’t you pick up a tool and do some actual work!?”

Yumichika raised a brow at him. “And end up all gross and sweaty like you. Not a chance!”

Zabimaru lifted his head. “I’m gonna bite him!”

“Not if I strangle him first!” He stomped over to Yumichika who took a fighting stance.

“You wanna go?”

“What are you two doing?” Ichigo rolled up and damn if he didn’t look fine~!

“Ichigo he…” Yumichika flew past Renji.

“Ichigo he’s being mean to me!”

The nue’s jaw dropped. “That’s it we having chicken tonight!”

Ichigo raised a hand. “Renji cool it.”

“But he doesn’t work, all he does is lay around.” Yumichika stuck his tongue out at the red head.

“Renji does have a point Yumichika.” He tensed.

“But master…” Ichigo raised his hand again.

“Yumichika, I’m happy to host you, but this is a farm. It takes a lot of hands to run it, and I really appreciate Renji’s help.” The nue blushed and was very touched by Ichigo’s words. “So I can’t have you picking fights with him.”

Yumichika pouted. ‘This is bad what if Ichigo doesn’t want me here and he sends me away?’ He starts sweating bullets. ‘But I don’t wanna end up like that sweaty gorilla.’

‘That dick I don’t know how but I sense he’s thinking something insulting about me!’ Renji thought.

“I suppose I can get along with this oafish brute, but field work just isn’t my style.” Renji glared at him.

Ichigo gave him head pats. “It’s okay, we’ll find work for you here. I’m not gonna force you to work a job not suited for you, as long as you apply yourself and work hard at the task given to you I think this can work out.”

Yumichika was led away, and Renji huffed and crossed his arms. ‘As if that pretty boy can handle hard work.’ Renji was annoyed, for a layered of reasons.

Since coming into their lives Yumichika has been a pain in his butt, not only did he kidnap Ichigo, but since moving in Ichigo’s had more paperwork to do, and the harpie’s just been eating, sleeping, and lazing about. Plus there was all the flirting, not that Renji was jealous...nope not at all!

He went back to work.

-x-

“Ohhh!”

Ichigo introduced Yumichika to the chicken coop. In his mind who better to raise his chickens then a harpie. What he didn’t expect was for Yumichika to be so gung-ho about it. “Leave this to me I got this!”

Indeed he did, he helped keep the coop clean, he fed the chickens, watched them to make sure they grazed and had plenty of exercise, he even showered them with compliments which coming from a harpie must have meant a lot. He even gathered the eggs. “Truly marvelous!” Yumichika examined each egg like he was a jeweler examining a diamond.

Renji was annoyed, especially with the harpie acting so smug about his new role on the farm. “Leave the chickens and the eggs to me!”

Yumichika showed off his harpie talents of song, lifting their spirits and making them happier. Happy and healthy chickens led to good quality eggs and more of them.

A peacock haprie’s song was quite powerful even capable of strengthening emotions, on the battlefield they could rally soldiers to keep fighting no matter how injured they were or how hopeless the outcome. Though for some monster’s a peacock’s song could be triggering, increasing aggression, irritation, and frustration.

They could also use their songs to relax, Yumichika used this to sing the chickens to sleep when it was late.

Taking his new role to heart he even acted as the farm’s rooster. Using his voice he even woke everyone up.

“Rise up...Rise up...it’s another new day, so it’s time to work and play...rise up…” Yumichika sang.

Renji heard the song and was stirred awake. “Ugh…” He was painfully erect. “That damn bird!” His cock was already dripping.

“Fuck!” He used one hand to work the shaft, while the other played with his heavy balls.

“If this is how we are, what about Ichigo?”

…

“SHIT!”

Yumichika slipped into Ichigo’s window.

The orangette woke up and he was pitching a tent. “Morning Yumichika!” He was slightly flushed.

“Mmm~ A beautiful morning to you Ichigo-sama!” He eyed his master’s tent. ‘Well the early bird gets the worm, and what a big worm it is!’

With a quick flap of his wings he blew off Ichigo’s blanket and joined him in bed. “Oi!”

“Allow me to help you with this!” He lowered Ichigo’s boxers allowing the hard cock, his pre-cum was already overflowing. ‘His cock is glistening like a jewel, such a rich manly musk that makes my mouth water!’

Yumichika started licking his dick, his tongue lapping up his essence. “Mmm, scho yummy!” He mouthed against his length.

The harpie just got his lips around the tip when Renji burst into the room. “Oi you damn bird brain!”

Yumichika ignored him and began to slurp and suck Ichigo’s cock. Renji blushed and growled. “Why you...don’t ignore me...get off him!”

“Renji!” The nue tensed. Ichigo was blushing from ear to ear. “Come here!” His eyes gleamed with hunger, transfixed on the red head’s massive cock.

“Oh…” Gulp! “Okay!”

He approached the bed and Ichigo wasted no time he took Renji’s dick into his mouth and began to suck it. “Holy!”

Yumichika’s song didn’t just wake Ichigo up it stirred his libido first thing in the morning.

The farmer wasted no time and began to till the soil, using three fingers to play with Renji’s tight ass. “Oh ohhh ohhh ahh ahh ahh ~!”

Yumichika focused on his task, sucking Ichigo’s penis with grace and love, slowly drinking down the appetizer that was his pre-cum. His own need twitched beneath him, and as Ichigo got closer to climax, he reached down and began working his arousal.

Having his cock and ass teased together had Renji climaxing first, his heavy seed being drunk down by the human host. Ichigo’s climax came after with Yumichika’s following seconds later.

‘Maybe having this feather butt around won’t be so bad.’ He thought but that opinion immediately changed as he saw Yumichika tried to mount himself on Ichigo’s still hard cock.

“Don’t go trying taking advantage you here me!”

“Taking advantage? Of what?”

“Your little siren song you doing.”

“My beautiful melody rouses the spirit, don’t compare it to such an ordinary melody. Besides...I don’t have much control over what happens with my morning melody. It just so happens our master is a very virile young man.” He said with a blush. The extra boost to his libido from the song was purely coincidence, Ichigo spent most of his time working, so he had built up a natural well of untapped lust.

“That still doesn’t give you the right to jump the line I was here first so that gives me seniority, respect the pecking order!”

“That doesn’t seem fair, I’m the most beautiful, so I should get first dibs.”

The two bickered back and forth, allowing Ichigo time to come down from his sex high. “Oi!” Bop Bop! He gave the two a bop on the head. “Yumichika clean up the mess you made in my bed, Renji fix the door...I’m gonna go take a shower…”

“Yes sir!” The two said. Yumichika took the sheets to be laundered while Renji went to fix the door, he had rushed in so fast he hadn’t controlled his strength causing some damage.

Ichigo stood under the shower spray. ‘How am I gonna deal with these two?’ Maybe they needed to have a house meeting and clear the air.

To be continued