Now that's officially the most explicit art I've ever done 💦 🐰 has cooked a cream pie and is having 🐻's super juicy yummy cake with lots of milky cream 🤤🍦
I'm going into details again that's why it takes time but perhaps I'd come back to old sketchy dark style from time to time👌
~
Kindly reminder for new patrons: please do not repost or share my NSFW art!
Besides... I wanted to share my story behind why I draw erotic gay art since it's a big topic in my art. So if anyone is curious, I'm sharing it here. Warning: a lot of text ahead and skip reading if you're here just for sexy art or simply don't like long texts (like me), it's okay lol
To begin with, I'm that type of asexual who doesn't see interest in drawing sex, but if it's drawing of making love between two people who have a deep love bond - and if I know their story, their personalities, their characters and I can feel their emotions - this is something I'd enjoy to create.
Along with taking pleasure in depicting intimate scenes of love, the process itself for me is an act of liberation both artistic and my personal.
I was born and grew up until teens in a, well... homophobic country, luckily my parents were always tolerant and open-minded people. In my family discipline and order was important, yet nobody forced me to be modest, it's just the environment I grew up in naturally. In the class I was that shy, quiet kid who'd study all the day without saying a word, and at home I'd spend hours drawing and painting.
I'm lucky I could have education on all subjects, I had access to all books possible. I loved books with illustrations, cartoons, comics and books on classical and academic art which had nude depictions (Greek & Roman gods mostly). I would secretly peek at them and re-draw, but hid them and never showed to anyone.
I drew first nude art of Greek god Apollo when I was 14, haha. It was a re-draw from ancient statue but I was so scared I later cut it and burned it in fireplace. It was such a good drawing though, very realistic *sigh* later I'd repeat my experiment with nude figures and then destroy all these drawings cause I thought it was illegal lol *naive* of course later I got to know it's allowed to self educate as long as you keep it to yourself.
In my other country people told me homosexuality is wrong and sin, but I was always against people's opinion. My family moved to different country where people were more open to queerness. At that time I was interested in Asian BL manga and anime and shipping culture, I was introduced to K-pop and J-pop idols shipping since then.
Besides getting familiar with transformative works I educated myself on the subject of LGBT+ as well. I discovered about real gay people in history and modern time. I realized that the world is so rainbow and so many famous personalities were queer. Since then I became a part and supporter of gay community and rights.
Actually I created my first gay original characters when I was 15, I wrote many AU's about them and drew many illustrations. I created my first semi-erotic art for my OC couple later. I destroyed it too, and did it repeatedly (now looking back to it I realise how innocent these drawings were). Yeah, I struggled with my identity cause people had so much misconception around asexuality and gay love expression. I'm glad now I'm comfortable with who I am and confident about what I stand for.
When I turned 18 I chose artistic freedom. I did a lot of technical drawings of nudes but not much the sex itself, when it came to couples I usually preferred soft art. Years ago when I did some NSFW commissions of OC's of my friends, they complained that my art is not sexual enough haha it was both criticism or compliment lol.
To be honest, homophobia and bullying online had a pressure on me in the past. I had an inner conflict: the desire to be free clashed with the fear of people's criticism. Whenever I shared something slightly sensual, not even NSFW - it got hate. For a while back then I tried to fit these 'morals' just not to be bashed. What's shocking is that even when I made the most innocent art, like fully clothed and just solo person people would find it dirty and shameful.
There was always that type of people who found all the reasons to cancel my art just cause it was either gay, or too 'feminine' men, or cause they simply just don't like me. Whether it's inner homophobia or they're just mean, these opinions - starting from homophobic and moralistic ones and ending with preference for clothing or a way of drawing anatomy - are not worth wasting time. Good thing I'm no longer bothered about it all.
I learned about human rights, about freedom of expression, free speech, about homosexuality and queerness. So I know well what I'm doing. I think that the struggles that the main characters of My Only One went through are kind of similar to my journey. I've been there, through fears, pains, ups and downs and overcoming it all finally. And many people can relate. Lately I feel very free and at ease with who I am now and what I'm doing. I don't ever want to be limited by what society defines I should be.
In this sense I call this transformation as a liberation. I want to feel comfortable and confident about depicting the beauty of human bodies because there's nothing to be ashamed of. Besides the beautiful sexual union, there's way more behind it, feelings, emotions, attachment, caring. For me, the most sensual art I ever created was with Taekook cause not a single couple ever touched my heart like they did. My love for them would require much more text so I'd stop here. I hope the story of my artistic and personal growth will help you to see my sensual art from a little different different angle ^^
Melske13
2025-03-26 05:01:46 +0000 UTCSaskia
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