87: The Group Date

“I won’t tell you to contact him, but perhaps this is a place where we could practice exercising empathy as we’ve discussed?”

Stephen clicked his tongue. “He ghosted me.”

“He did.”

“He knew about how my family abandoned me, and he did the same thing.”

“Yes, it was very hurtful. What kind of things do you think he may have been feeling?”

Stephen crossed his arms, “I don’t know. I’m bad at empathy, remember?”

“I remember.”

“Maybe I’m a sociopath?” he asked hopefully.

Ms. Chowdhury just raised her eyebrows at that, then continued, “Was Inho a malicious person?”

“No.”

“And how did he deal with stressful events? Did he fight? Or did he flee? Freeze?”

“Well, sometimes he’d fight but…” Stephen considered. “He did tend to run away a lot.”

“And we’ve addressed that there was a very triggering event for him, with his ex-partner, and your... involvement.”

“But still,” Stephen’s voice got louder, “He abandoned me! Ghosted! It’s fundamentally unacceptable, I–, I–! He wronged me! How am I supposed to care about his feelings here? I don't! I can’t. That's... irrational!”

Ms. Chowdhury lightly tapped her stylus against her tablet. “Sometimes, we use logic as a sort of shield to stop us from engaging with our empathy. It’s not that you can’t care about what he’s feeling, you’re just protecting yourself.”

Stephen shook his head in wordless annoyance as if trying to shake off a mosquito.

“But, Stephen, if you don’t allow yourself to explore the empathy and compassion that you have for him, then you aren’t connecting with what you really want for yourself either. Do you want to be broken up with him? Do you want to hold on to this hurt and anger for the long term?”

Stephen didn’t respond right away, and when he did, his tone was defeated, “Don’t I get to hold on to any shred of pride here?”

“Is your pride worth losing someone you love?”

****

Inho’s grandfather was recovering. The doctors said he could come home next week, though he’d need lots of extra help at first, and frequent visits to the hospital. Nonetheless, the news was more than welcome, and with his evenings now free, Inho began covering shifts for Junseo at a small gym nearby.

The work was easy: checking people in and keeping an eye on the floor, and his coworkers were nice. One of the personal trainers in particular always came by to chat between client sessions, and the way she touched his arm when she laughed was like a soothing balm on the destroyed confidence of two horrible breakups back-to-back.

He was starting to look forward to the group date on Saturday just a little. At least, that’s what he told himself every time he looked at his phone and willed himself not to open the messages from Stephen.

When Saturday rolled around though, he couldn’t tell if he was nervous, excited, or what, but his body seemed to be concerned because he had to nervous-pee every ten minutes. He put on his newest clothes (he was way overdue to buy some replacements) and was reminded of the last time he’d worn this particular striped sweater. To meet Stephen’s friends. He remembered Stephen’s hands pushing it up and running over his chest in the kitchen. He remembered pulling it out of Stephen’s grasp and storming away. His empty bladder squeezed and he ran to the bathroom one last time before heading out.

When he arrived, Junseo was sitting in a booth across from three women. He welcomed Inho with the panicked eyes of someone bearing the scrutiny of three complete strangers that one might like to date.

Inho greeted the women with his best smile, they were all cute. This was a good idea. As soon as they were done trading names, Junseo leaned over to him and muttered in his ear, “Dude, you’re late – I was dying here.”

Inho smirked at him, checked to see that the women were chatting over the menu, and whispered back, “Sorry, I couldn’t stop pissing.”

“Ugh, you think that’s bad? I’m about to shit my pants right now.”

Inho laughed; Junseo was a disaster. “Who’s the third guy? Hayoon?”

“No asshole, Hayoon has a girlfriend. Ah, he’s here now.” Junseo half-stood in his seat and waved at someone entering the restaurant.

Inho turned to look, and for an instant time slowed down just a little. Min walked in looking absolutely different than Inho had ever seen him. He was wearing a navy suit tailored perfectly to his slim body, a crisp white shirt unbuttoned at the neck, and Inho could swear his fresh haircut blew slightly in an imaginary breeze. He strode over with uncharacteristic confidence and greeted the new people before nodding at Inho and Junseo. He settled on the other side of Junseo and started introducing himself.

“What the fuck, why does he look so good?” Junseo muttered, “Nobody’s even going to look at me today.”

“Is he wearing contacts? I’ve never seen him like that.”

“You’re supposed to be the hot one, ahhhhhhh,” Junseo keened, “Now he’s got the job and the looks, I should just leave.”

Inho suppressed a cackle and aimed a smile at the petite woman in front of him. Her long hair was dyed brown and she had big eyes and a crooked smile. She turned to him and offered the drinks menu and some polite conversation about what he liked to drink. She was really cute, but he had to admit, Min’s appearance was occupying an unreasonable amount of his brainpower.

Once food and drinks were ordered, the brunette got up to go to the bathroom, and the other two immediately joined her.

“Are they going together ‘cause they hate us?” Junseo complained, “They’re gonna talk about how two good ones and a dud showed up.”

Min patted his shoulder, “You’re a catch buddy, don’t be so hard on yourself.”

“Don’t patronize me you jerk, coming in here looking like a chaebol heir. I see you!”

Min laughed. “I don’t know what you mean.”

Junseo gave him an incredulous glare, then sighed, “So how come you came this time? You never usually come when I invite you. It’s ‘cause Inho is here, isn’t it? You like him better than me. Ugh, nobody wants me!”

Min laughed and his gaze flicked to Inho, “No, there’s no particular reason; you asked and I happened to be free.”

Inho looked away, his cheeks heating slightly. Of all the people he expected to make him feel shy on this date, it surely hadn’t been Min.