[Insider] Toxic Attraction CH27
Added 2025-02-20 20:09:48 +0000 UTCHey all, hope everyone v-day was good. I've bee
Comments
Phone sex is horribly disappointing
KB
2025-02-25 20:51:51 +0000 UTCThe end scene needs to be fixed. He needs to show up unannounced again. Please. For a hot sex scene and convince her to cheat when she told Dan she would stop doing it with Lester. That would make this story perfect.
KB
2025-02-25 20:51:28 +0000 UTCThe “I love you” comments were portrayed as rote responses vs heartfelt, at least on Sarah’s part. (I think this is the first time Lester and Sarah had a phone conversation). DS should have included Lester’s thoughts on his “I love you.” I don’t think they were said in the heat of the moment…they both had come off their orgasm highs. Be interesting to see if there is more exploration of this in the final version or revisited in the next chapter.
J Lewis
2025-02-24 21:59:08 +0000 UTCGonna love to see Sarah becoming Lester’s pornstar, being shy on camera at first and getting more and more depraved
ojapa O
2025-02-23 08:27:49 +0000 UTCI honestly feel for Don. He had to keep TA going because the majority of the members likely joined because of TA. This however is Don’s opportunity for him to show his literary brilliance by introducing us to a new tale that leaves us wanting more. I have faith in your brilliance Don!!! Have confidence in your abilities and remind us with your incredible stories why we joined up in the first place.
OdieK
2025-02-23 04:00:44 +0000 UTCThe cancel membership button is right there, just a click or two away. Nobody is making you stay and pay if it's been so terrible for so long. To share a criticism or two because not every plot twist does it for you is one thing. But to actively hate the whole story so much but to be here paying the top tier subscription rate anyway doesn't make any sense to me.
Gabby
2025-02-23 02:01:58 +0000 UTCThe phone sex scene seemed to be there to facilitate the heat of the moment "I love yous". Couldn't have done that with an in person scene, and it would have been weird in a different normal phone conversation, so it made sense to do it like this. In my opinion at least. I agree that the Dan/Sarah conversation here could have been much better though. For the last few chapters their interactions with each other have come across as an afterthought when they should feel more pivotal to the story.
Gabby
2025-02-23 01:50:58 +0000 UTCPersonally, I'm not as bothered as some commenters here about the speed of the progression of the main story. I was a little bit a while ago, but I've grown to enjoy the more detailed and nuanced character work that has come from it. My issue with the story speed is the sub plots that don't do much of anything for me. If you removed Jesse from the whole story completely (not just this chapter), it wouldn't tarnish the story at all for me. Maybe one of his first appearances using Dan's phone to text Sarah which put her in Lesters bed could stay. But what benefit has he provided since? Dan getting him fired, dancing with Sarah at the club, the whole Lincoln group thing - none of it mattered to the bigger picture (only to the progression of that sub plots) and the main story plays out the same without it. You can then do something else with the hotel scene and then scrap this whole obsessed stalker thing from the last couple of chapters. There's other characters and sub plots that could be removed too, Byron's role should have been smaller, Sentinel Security should just be a passing comment without all the detail, and al of that frees up lots of chapters so the main plot goes exactly as it has, but would have got to this point 5 or 6 chapters (or possbly even 10 chapters at a push) ago, which may solve the problem others have with a lack of progression in 2 years. It's all down to immediate publication and Don just writing all of the ideas he has. You'd really want him to have written 4 or 5 chapters ahead of publishing, so when ideas prove mostly pointless, he can go back and remove them before our eyes see them. You could definitely edit these 27 chapters down to 15-20 at most with the benefit of hindsight.
Gabby
2025-02-23 01:18:50 +0000 UTCExactly!
Chris K
2025-02-22 19:29:48 +0000 UTCHere! Here! Yes I pretty much read these and skip over the repetitive sex scenes and able to get through it in about 15 minutes. The storyline is now almost irrelevant. Knew it would be a bad episode when it started out with Jesse. Worse character of all time.
Vinny
2025-02-22 18:43:56 +0000 UTCWow, a measured response on how the story isnt working for you and taking personal accountability by stepping away for a few months and checking back in to see if the author circles back to your personal taste or starts a new story that gets you interested? Some people in this chat should take notes...
tim
2025-02-22 17:12:59 +0000 UTCOne of the reasons I joined was to continue the Sarah/Dan/Lester journey looking for those heart racing unexpected moments of earlier chapters that caught us off-guard in a good way. Unfortunately these moments generally appear to be absent in recent chapters which is not surprising when a story drags on and on forcing the author to try and come up with something new that will have wide appeal to all. I personally believe that it is time for TA to come to an end as there seems little to be added at this stage. Having said that DS has written some amazing stories such as Tainted Conception which is my personal favorite. DS has already mentioned that he has some other story ideas in mind and I hope we will begin to see those materialize soon. For that reason I will continue to hang on for another month or two and encourage anyone thinking of moving on to do the same. For me it is those new ideas that will determine my future status an not TA which I believe has run its course.
OdieK
2025-02-22 15:52:50 +0000 UTCI understand the urge as a writer to keep stretching the story out to milk this storyline for what it’s worth. I dont fault don for it, we all gotta make money somehow right? But this can be done without slowing down the pace and progress of the storyline. There are multiple avenues for this depending on how the storyline progresses but one way would be to keep the story going after Dan discovers Sarahs infidelity and Sarah is too far gone to give up on Lester. Have the story transform into a hotwife tale where Don reluctantly accepts that Lester is going to be a part of the couples lives whether he likes it or not. Continue the storyline with Lester and Sarah going at it in front of Dan as Lester being Sarahs bull or make the relationship polyamorous completely. Show more of Dan and Sarahs story as they both come to accept this new dynamic. Show Dans monologue as he gives up and accepts that another man will be impregnating the love of his life. Or when his wife falls in love with a man he hates and is beneath her. Have lester and sarah go on vacations etc etc
Jackfrost
2025-02-22 15:38:56 +0000 UTCThe phone sex would had been much more intense if Sarah’s daughters were in their bedroom sleeping. Kids at the grandparents sleeping overnight during the middle of the week is not likely. Sarah once again would have a favorable impression of Lester who would have demonstrated constraint/respect to the “no house visit when the girls are home rule”. Having Sarah playing with herself while lying in bed whispering to Lester while reminding herself the girls are home. In a story chalked full of unrealistic scenarios this one would be realistic.
J Lewis
2025-02-22 12:45:14 +0000 UTCYou wrote a book for this story, and that's hilarious. It's been going on for 2 years and you are that invested? Yeah, you are part of the problem
Elfy
2025-02-22 03:54:27 +0000 UTCDon is lying. This story is not a real story. It's meant for the weirdos. No author writes a story this bad for 2 years. It's meant for the idiots on his discord. I just laugh and mock at this point. This story is such a bunch of a nonsense
Elfy
2025-02-22 03:52:15 +0000 UTCI love how Don wrote the conversation Sarah and Dan. Dan is asking all the correct questions of Sarah and listening with a clear head, while Sarah is trying to hide details, gloss over facts, and turn things around on him but he's not having it. When he calls her out for cheating, because she is NOT telling him in advance, she is not abiding by the rules they set down, she feels Dan is trying to put her in a box. I love how Don wrote that section, because its the classic cheating wife playbook. "I feel good and like it so I have the right to do it." So Don has set this up for more uncommunicated behavior by Sarah, playing right into Lester's hand. On a separate topic, the mystery of why Dan didn't answer her phone call will raise a lot of speculation in our reader community.
Sigma
2025-02-22 02:38:16 +0000 UTCI enthusiastically agree with 1 and 2. Personally I am not as much of a fan of 3. The trope where Dan gets upset and Sarah pushes his buttons until Dan gets off makes Dan too much of a pushover. When he’s too much of a pushover then the relationship with Lester loses tension because it is no longer taboo, it’s just a part of the fantasy.
qwertyuiop0911
2025-02-21 22:45:39 +0000 UTCI feel the story is progressing to slow now and we need to speed some of the main story up
Melonball171
2025-02-21 22:21:23 +0000 UTCI really like your vision and it would be great if DS could adjust to reflect more along your thinking.
GW
2025-02-21 20:21:20 +0000 UTCOverall a little better than the previous chapter but thats not saying much. I thought Don said things are coming to a head this chapter but that doesn’t seem like it at all. And what’s with that phone sex scene at the end? What even was the point of it? Either have an actual sex scene or don’t have one. The coversation between Dan and Sarah felt kinda dry and left much to be desired. I don’t know how they argued and then everything settled down at the end of the call all of a sudden. Sarah almost took being called a cheater too well. It seemed like they were going in for a huge fight but then they settled down for no apparent reason. If the goal was not to have sarah and dan fight, there was no reason for Sarah to share her stories with dan. Just have it be a normal coversation and that be the end of it. Or have them fight and have sarah leave the call seething. Theres no sense in building up to a fight and all of a sudden leveling off like it was no big deal.
Jackfrost
2025-02-21 19:10:39 +0000 UTCHonestly, I'm thinking of putting my subscription on pause and coming back in a few months to enjoy the progress of the story. Not because I regret spending money on a subscription, but because the progress in each individual chapter is too excruciatingly slow, and the further it goes, the slower it gets. What have we got now? Another routine sex between Sarah and Lester at the beginning of the chapter, phone sex at the end which is more of a step backwards in the sexual dynamic, also a conversation between Sarah and Dan that didn't change anything about their relationship per se but just left the status quo. The only potentially interesting milestone is the situation between Dan and Jesse and it would seem that after that we can expect more action in the next chapter. But given the slow pace that Don has taken, I wouldn't be surprised if Sarah doesn't find out about it until 3-4 chapters later, and in the next chapter we'll again see another routine sex between Lester and Sarah in the office, at her house or in his hotel and plus some small development of side arcs related to Marie or Otis for example, not even necessarily sex. That's why I think if I read a few chapters at a time, I'd get more satisfaction from the story development than the current minor portions.
Daniel
2025-02-21 18:29:31 +0000 UTCThis chapter was so much better than the previous one, with no unnecessary third-party banging of Sarah. I do see some of the points that I want to make about this chapter and, if Don sees fit, for the progress of further chapters. 1. Lester should really have come over to Sarah's house, either to surprise her or she called him over. Could have been no better situation tbh with the children out of the picture, Dan calling her a cheat and her own emotional turmoil about the circumstances, apart from Lester being her only rock over the past several weeks. All this should have led to some really HOT breeding roleplay. Would have also given Lester a chance to swap out/ tamper with the birth control. 2. Dan really should lose his job over the punching of Jesse and the rumours about him. Jesse could also sue him for bodily harm. This should put him in further financial strain and push him (or rather Sarah) towards further dependence on Lester. But Lester does a reverse psychology play and puts no additional conditions for the additional money, which might make Sarah see him in a better light than Dan. The loss of his job could also see him move away from Chicago to Sentinel's headquarters to focus on his work there, leaving Lester and Sarah free both in Middleton and Chicago. 3. Dan calling Sarah a cheat should have led to a massive fight since all this started because of Dan. Calling your wife a cheat generally doesnt lead to such a civil conversation. Sarah should have blown up on Dan and hung up or called Dan pathetic which would caused a further rift between them and led to silence for a few weeks, enough time for Lester to embed himself even further in Sarah's life as her emotional and sexual partner and protector. 4. Lester should further cement his role as Sarah's protector by getting Otis fired since she's so scared at the moment which makes her wonder how he'd be as a long-term partner given his financial stability and sexual prowess, not to mention his obvious attraction to her (he doesnt seem to have tried anything with any other woman since Sarah entered his life and seems only to want her atm, for whatever reasons). 5. The way Sarah looked for Lester at the beginning of the story shows how dependent she's on him now and also that she likely misses him when she doesnt give her attention. This and the "Love You's' towards the end likely shows the relationship may have progressed beyond the purely sexual for both of them and they genuinely want to have something more. Also, the fact that Lester wants to be her Chicago husband and Sarah wants him to work for it shows the underlying wants they have from each other. 6. I still think we need more breeding/ marriage roleplay and baby-making sex, given they're engaged now. We need to see a marriage too (like Sarah thought here for a moment) and a smoking hot honeymoon. The birth control needs to go now and Sarah/ Lester need to spend more time together as a couple given they're both in the same place with no Dan. Sarah pushing him away after all she's done makes no sense anymore (she really is cheating now and might as well accept the relationship). More of the children being away at the grandparents with the house available to the couple would be welcome, as would multiple day business trips together. Maybe Sarah could even not fall asleep this night and calls Lester over within a couple of hours leading to fabulous sex and trying to understand what Lester thinks about them. The next day Lester could possibly make up some story at work about a work trip and take Sarah out of the city for two days for a date. Maybe Lester can be introduced to Sarah's girls and he acts like a perfect father figure for them, making Sarah wonder how her and Lester's babies would be like and how he'd be as a father. Just some thoughts I had after reading this chapter. I really think the progress should be a bit faster. I really am looking forward to Dan losing his wife to Lester and being involved in a nonsense fight with Jesse while Lester impregnates his wife and takes her away permanently, both physically and emotionally. Apologies for the length and any typos :)
Northern Lord
2025-02-21 08:34:54 +0000 UTCI agree that Lester going to the house would be better for this story. Overall I enjoyed this but think I few adjustments would make this pop. 1. I think Lester should make Sarah say more sexually and emotional statements, examples include telling Lester he is a better husband than Dan, she will divorce Dan and she wants to have Lesters baby. She could perhaps just roleplay the last bit at the request of Lester. 2. Lester I think should plainly ask Sarah to stop taking the BC. 3. I think maybe in Dan and Sarah's phone call, she could perhaps have some sexual content and maybe a session of phone sex...the twist being is we get insight into her comparisons with Lester.
Bob James
2025-02-21 07:30:54 +0000 UTCI would like to have seen Sarah initiate the text/cam session at the end. Including send ever more explicit selfies/vids (keepers), and ask him to visit.
Waratah David
2025-02-21 07:30:30 +0000 UTCI wanted him to end up coming over to her house too
KB
2025-02-21 04:43:51 +0000 UTCIf you add a sex scene of him coming to her house and they make love that would make this chapter perfect. Progress that storyline as well perhaps
KB
2025-02-21 04:43:22 +0000 UTCIts ridiculous that anyone believes that this is the realistic story. I already pointed out the clown show. By all Means write garbage and waste time. Don't bother coming to me later. I have no use for imbeciles
Elfy
2025-02-21 04:17:41 +0000 UTCThe first parts of this chapter was great. Don’t see how Jesse has gone from hapless loser to over the top stalker but I like the character, just wish he had been used as more of thorn in Dan’s side like in the beginning. We seem to be dancing around the same circle. Sarah has mind blowing sex with Lester, promises to be his personal fuck toy, willing to do anything he says, but then turns him away when she has the perfect opportunity to have a whole night alone with him. One convo with Dan derails everything that Lester has so masterfully done to get her submission to him. The “I Love You’s” was a nice touch, but would have preferred to hear Sarah tell him to come over and not waste his load. She has repeatedly said she loves it, needs it, wants it, but doesn’t take a perfect opportunity to have it. Makes no sense. The convo with Dan needed more passion. His wife is admittedly cheating and he has little to no reaction but then he punches Jesse? Dan is the ultimate split personality. Love this story and I’m looking forward to seeing it to the end.
Dodge1109
2025-02-21 03:55:11 +0000 UTCI think it just being written by AI at this point. Will keep pumping out stories until we are all dead and buried.
Vinny
2025-02-21 03:38:27 +0000 UTCWell, at least the word "cheating" finally was said by Dan.
Sigma
2025-02-21 02:39:52 +0000 UTCDan is irrelevant. He has no agency. He doesn't matter. The kids don't matter. Sarah's parents don't matter. The entire story is a circle jerk at this point to satisfy the dudes who get off on the imagery. We are over 2 years of a plot now. I mean really, its a joke. The eroticism is dead. Don's discord is funding his retirement. I suppose I am too. I just can't turn away from this nonsense.
Elfy
2025-02-21 02:18:45 +0000 UTCAgree…the storyline advances like a glacier. Only thing that was new is Dan punching out Jesse. I wonder though if Dan loses his job…of course that could have been answered with one additional paragraph.
J Lewis
2025-02-21 01:11:39 +0000 UTCI give up lol
KB
2025-02-21 01:09:36 +0000 UTCThis is the song that doesn't end. It just goes on and on, my friend. Some people started singing it not knowing what it was and they'll continue singing it forever just because... Shari Lewis is rolling over in her grave after associating this story with her show, but I think y'all get my point.
Elfy
2025-02-21 00:30:41 +0000 UTCagreed
GW
2025-02-20 23:47:49 +0000 UTCThe last one.
Chris K
2025-02-20 23:11:38 +0000 UTCI agree!
Chris K
2025-02-20 23:10:57 +0000 UTCI would have rather seen him convince her to let him come over
KB
2025-02-20 23:06:07 +0000 UTCThe ring needs to make an appearance…perhaps while Lester is plowing Sarah and she snags the ring in the sheets or she twirls it while talking to Dan or maybe while she reflects on the exchange of “I love you’s” at the end.
J Lewis
2025-02-20 22:30:38 +0000 UTC
