Self-Spanking: Tips & Tricks

I decided to release this to the public to help lonely butts out there who are struggling in quarantine, but I hope you delightful patrons find this no less entertaining or helpful.

Hope everyone is doing alright. <3 Thank you for your support and love in this trying time. We'll get through this together, and I hope that my art & writing has brought you some relief, joy, and/or distraction.

Now without further ado....

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SELF SPANKING

Pent up at home? Unable to hook up with cuties? Not being able to find a partner to spank you can be frustrating. But it doesn't mean you can't have fun!

While the idea of spanking yourself can be a little intimidating -or feel silly- there are ways you can create a fun and authentic experience for yourself. Though many spanking enthusiasts will agree that self-spanking isn't the same as being spanked by someone else, I personally believe that, while this is true, self-spanking does have value and is a good skill to learn, even if you already have a partner.

For example, you may have a partner who isn't as into spanking as you are and struggles to give you sessions that push your boundaries- or maybe they go on a trip, leaving you to fulfill your own needs for a while. Self-spanking can be fantastic in these situations as well.

However, inflicting pain, especially the kind many spanking enthusiasts seek, is no easy task. So how does one go about spanking themselves in a way that's truly fulfilling?

PICK YOUR TIME WISELY

This one's for all those who don't have a partner to spank them, and potentially live with roommates or family! You'll want to set aside a block of time where you can enjoy your session, exactly as you would with a real spanking. Make sure you won't be interrupted and that you won't have to worry about making noise. The more nervous you are about these things, the less likely it is that you'll be able to enjoy the session properly. So pick a time that you can dedicate a decent amount of energy to your spanking, and not have to worry about being interrupted!

A NOTE: That said, quarantine is going to make self-spanking nearly impossible for those living with roomies or their family. Please do not encourage your family and roommates to leave the house during the outbreak. No boner is worth your safety or the safety of others.

If you do not have roommates or family to worry about, read on!

CHOOSE IMPLEMENTS WISELY

Some implements, while sexy, don't work very well for self-spankings. In general, shorter implements work better than long ones! Rigid implements such as paddles work wonderfully for positions where you're laying down or bent over, while flexible implements such as short straps work beautifully for standing positions. Before your session, do some test strikes to see how the chosen implement feels at full strength. The right implement won't be too harsh on the edges, won't wrap around your buttocks, and will be predictable in its reach & strike area. You want them to feel like an extension of your arm. 

Many people also choose to use their hands, but I personally find it to not be worth the effort. It's awkward, and difficult to reach parts of your booty properly. While I encourage you to try and figure out what works best for you, I skip hands altogether. I also don't recommend canes, crops, or floggers, as they aren't very good for self-spanking due to either their difficulty or their tendency to wrap around the sides of the buttocks. You want your implement to hit the meatiest part of your butt, not the edges. 

My personal favorite implements are my trusty flat-backed hairbrush and ping pong paddle! These implements are not only short, they have enough heft to sting even when my arm is getting tired. Make sure to pick something that has enough weight to satisfy. If you get a happy sting from a medium-strength test swing, it's probably a good implement to use!

CHOOSE POSITIONS WISELY

As with regular spanking encounters, a good position for a self-spanking session will support your weight comfortably and without wobbling, will allow you to breathe normally, and will provide a good angle for reaching your butt cheek. I say "cheek" in singular, not plural, because most folks probably won't be able to reach both cheeks comfortably in most positions, especially if you're like me and a bit on the chunky side. Don't be afraid to switch arms as needed to reach the rest of your ass, or change positions altogether.

My personal favorite position is lying on my side on the bed. This is by far the most comfortable position I have found, and while it may not have the flavor of traditional bent-over positions, it's extremely easy to swing your arm for longer periods of time and is generally comfortable enough to hold for as long as needed. It does, however, obscure the sit-spot, so if you're a fan of getting spanked in that area, you might consider tucking your knees to your chest to reach it. Beware though- stretching the skin taut can mean you'll bruise a bit easier with lighter strikes, as the bottom will have less "give". 

For a more traditional feel, it is possible to bend over the side of the bed or the arm of a couch, but your arm may tire out quickly in this position, even if you're fit. If you do this position, I recommend switching arms often, or using this position for only part of your spanking. After all, the only part we want to hurt during these sessions is our butts!

Kneeling or standing is a popular position, especially for whippy implements, such as straps. It's gentle on the arm, too, so if you're having trouble with your shoulders, give this position a whirl! Just make sure you put some padding down under your knees, unless knee pain and limping is also your kink. (And even then, please be safe- no spanking is worth long-term injury.)

An unconventional and surprisingly fun position for very short sessions is propping your feet up on a wall while laying on your back on the bed. This is a fairly easy position to swing implements in, but you do run the risk of hitting the wall if you have short legs like I do. It's also quite easy to miss your bottom entirely and hit your thighs- but if you're into that, it can be a fun position to experiment with. Be sure to give yourself frequent breaks in this position or keep your session very short. Otherwise, you may get pins and needles.

MOTIVATING YOURSELF

After talking with countless people about the subject, I've found that the real trouble with self-spanking isn't finding a position or implement, it's finding the motivation and achieving the same feeling as a real spanking. Inflicting pain on yourself, even the fun kind, is really difficult, especially if you're into hard spankings! 

Achieving a self-spanking that satisfies you does take a certain amount of discipline, I'm afraid, there's no getting around that. But there are ways that you can hold yourself accountable for finishing sessions or pushing yourself!

METHOD 1: ENLIST A TOP'S HELP

When my wife and I were in a long-distance relationship, we still managed to have a successful domestic discipline dynamic. We did this through self-spanking sessions guided by my Domme! If you happen to have a partner who's willing to cam with you, ask them if they can supervise your discipline sessions. This is probably the easiest way to get motivated and push yourself during a self-spanking session, as the Dom/me can call out instructions like they would in a normal scenario, including telling you to hit harder or faster if they sense you're going easy on yourself. Believe it or not, these self-spanking sessions with my then-fiancée were some of the hardest spankings I've ever had, and I quite frequently bore lasting marks from them. 

Having a top supervise your spanking via cam or voice chat can give a formal feeling to your spanking too, if you're into punishment sessions. You can set up the computer/webcam in a certain way, lay out your implements, be in a certain state of dress, or arrange your pillows. All of this can add to a spanking's formality and help it feel like you're in a real spanking scenario, as if the Dom/me were spanking your bottom themselves!

Don't forget though, communication is important. Have protocol in place for when your arm gets tired, and be honest with them about your status. Warn them as soon as your arm starts aching so they can plan to tell you to switch arms or positions in advance. This helps keep the flow of a spanking intact and avoids the temptation to quit when the spanking itself is getting difficult to administer because of your burning bottom.

While you shouldn't push through an aching arm, push your bottom. Remind yourself that your arm belongs to your Dom/me. If it's not aching, spank!

Seriously though, do not continue spanking if your arm starts aching. Ask to switch arms or positions. Consider having a safeword specifically for when your arm starts to ache!

It's also fun to conclude each session with your Dom/me taking a photo or screen grab of your handiwork. I know I still have my old collection somewhere... But it definitely adds some humiliation and formality to the whole shebang!

METHOD 2: FIND A VIDEO

If you do not have a top, an amazing way to push yourself is to find a spanking video you like and spank along to the beat of the spanker's whacks. Find a video at a decent length that uses a pace that will push yourself, but not hurt yourself. If it's not enough at the end of the video, switch positions/arms and start over!

My personal method is to put on my favorite video and spank along to the beat using my lightest implement, then start over and switch cheeks. I'm usually pretty toasty by the end of it, but if it's not enough, I'll start the entire process over again with a heavier implement until I've had enough.

Videos provide sound cues for how hard the top is hitting as well, so try to follow along with not only the beat, but the severity. When done correctly, this method can provide many memorable, wonderful sessions that feel like punishments for you roleplayers out there.

This does take more self-discipline than being guided directly by a top, but it's a great way to measure your session and hold yourself accountable! Though as always, switch positions or arms when your arm starts to ache.

METHOD 3: ASSIGN A STROKE COUNT

If the aforementioned methods aren't feasible, plan some time before your session to write down how many strokes you think you should get. Be honest and push yourself! I've found this method to be less effective than the first two, but it works in a pinch. You also have to know your own limits and have a lot of self discipline to assign yourself enough whacks and carry them out.

This is a good method for whipping yourself with a strap, though. When using this method, I personally recommend setting a smaller number of whacks and hitting as hard as you safely can. You can adjust this number for later sessions if it's not enough, or combine it with other punishments such as wearing a plug.

METHOD 4: USE A TIMER

Setting an egg timer can be a great way to hold yourself accountable. Simply set the timer and spank until you hear it go off! For best results, I recommend setting shorter times and spanking each cheek individually non-stop. For example, set the timer for 2 minutes, then go to town on your right cheek. When it goes off, set it for another 2 minutes and go to town on your left cheek. Rinse, repeat, until you're nice and red! I personally spank as hard and fast as I can when using this method, though it can get tiring on the arm- which is why I recommend setting the clock for short times. 

For this method, I recommend laying on your side on the bed and using a short paddle or hairbrush. It's difficult to go all-out with whippy implements, which makes this method a little less effective.

You can also combine an egg timer with an assigned stroke count. If you don't complete the assigned strikes within a certain amount of time, consider giving yourself additional punishments or strokes.

LOCATIONS OUTSIDE THE BEDROOM

If you still need help getting into the right mindset, you can try spanking yourself in rooms outside of your bedroom. I find that spanking myself in the kitchen feels much naughtier, and adds to the ambiance. Other locations may include a garage or tool shed- just make sure you won't be interrupted and that the area is clear of debris that may hurt you! And please, be courteous to your neighbors. Unless they expressly consent to watching or hearing you get your ass beat, keep your spankings indoors and away from prying eyes.

IN CONCLUSION

We live in tough times, but that doesn't mean you have to forego the things you love. Especially spanking! Being in quarantine is no excuse to run rampant with misbehavior... especially now that you've read this article and know all about how to self-spank effectively!

So go on, drop trou, and have a whack at it!~