Life Update: My mood lately (slightly better)

Tldr, stuff might be going slower, so I just wanna have informed about that.
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Update: Just had my talk with a job expert and im like 99% sure i will be getting a job coach to help me find the right work space for me and be able to stay working at a spot for longer. So I'm doing a bit better then yesterday already.

I'm gonna go on to take a break from commissions and art trades or collabs, since due to a second or third party being involved, it adds pressure.

So hopefully I can get in the right mood to at least draw some of my own ideas, so this page doesn't totally dry up. But yeah just my heads a lil full with irl stuff. So sorry for if there won't be daily posts or updates on drawings, but yeah mental stuff is just a pain in the butt sometimes.

For those worried, I do not intend this to affect the monthly prompt poll, taking suggestions will continue to happen on the 10th and the poll will open at the 15th like usual.
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Originally:
I'm looking into finding work again. I'm looking with a social worker and stuff, but it's all taking so long and slow that it's getting on my nerves. I feel a bit useless, like I won't be able to move out and be on my own ever. When feeling like that it is just hard to sit down and draw some dude in a dress like I haven't been sitting and waiting, wasting away months, possibly two years by now all because due to my autism I just got a hard time keeping a job, or I kept making the wrong choices in the past based on emotion.

I'm sorry to suddenly drop this, but yeah I'm just feeling like I don't got what it takes to ever be able to comfortably live. My sleep schedule is a mess, I just sleep to pass the time away or to not have to be stuck in feeling my bad mood. I'm just angry with myself, I'm angry with how long I gotta wait for all the help services and not even being sure if those services will help me in the end. But I can't trust my own judgement anymore either as all the times I've quit something, it ended up being for the worse then if I just had gritted my teeth and stayed.

Maybe I'm sharing too much right now, I dunno, I just feel that with you all being my Patrons or people thinking about becoming Patrons, people who wanna pay to see my stuff, have the right to know why I might be posting less stuff in the coming days. Maybe I need a lil break to deal with the real life stuff instead of juggling online life and real life, I dunno.

I'm fine but just depressed.