Rejected Joke #4

Another one I may have posted already. Or posted to my LiveJournal many years ago. I don't remember. I do remember that this is an actual pitched-and-rejected cartoon. I sent this to Nickelodeon Magazine and got a nice rejection note from comics editor Chris Duffy, basically saying he really liked it but it wasn't right for Nick Mag's readers. The threatening nature of the gag was a little too tough, even if completely cartoonish. I may have also pitched it to MAD< which probably rejected it for being too weak for their audience. I always thought it was decent. I flipped through the Dork hardcover to see if I actually drew it up for Dork #11, but I can't find it. So, unless I find it in print somewhere, I didn't use it. I'd throw it into a collection or use it as a spot gag if the need arose. maybe add a ventriloquist in the background holding up a cop puppet? It'll probably never get used.

Did you know the technical term for a ventriloquist's puppet is "ventriloquial figure"? I read a long time ago that dummy is a popular term but they used to refer to the creepy little bastards as "figures". Most everyone uses "dummy" now, of course. I think "dummy" can be used for both the puppet and the practitioner. Imagine sitting in front of a mirror for decades practicing having a conversation with yourself? With a creepy bastard puppet on your lap? Ha ha, I'm being overly mean. I am kind of fascinated by ventriloquists. I just wish they spent as much time working on their material as they do on their deception techniques. Most ventriloquists are fascinating but pretty unfunny. In a way similar to impersonators, the way they say things is usually far more impressive than what they say. You need jokes to go along with the vocal shenanigans. Even the best of them tend to have nothing going for them joke-wise. At least ventriloquism has a deception aspect akin to magic. Too often, though, the jokes are beside the point.

Speaking of beside the point, I had no intention of talking about ventriloquists and celebrity impersonators. I wonder which is the "healthiest" profession, cartoonist, ventriloquist or impersonator? Juggler? Unicyclist? Fire-breather? Stop-motion animator? That's a den of wonky obsessives, that bunch. Obsessive kid/adult jobs.

I'm off track again.

Getting back on track now.

Please hold.

Ahem.

Okay.

I wish there was a venue for gag panels other than the New Yorker, which I never felt comfortable aiming anything at or attending their cartoon gatherings (I think they pitch at them, I was invited to one by Shannon Wheeler years ago when he was in town, but was too chicken and socially anxious to go, even with him there). I miss Nickelodeon Magazine, in case I haven't mentioned that often enough. I loved placing work with them, and seeing our comics in print. And we got to keep our original material. I still want to collect all those gags with our kid-friendly comics like Kid Blastoff, Biff-Bam-Pow, etc. There's probably 60 pages-worth, at a guess, perhaps more.

Human cannonball?

Traveling knife sharpener?

Uh-oh. Veering off-course again.

I better take a pill or something. My brain is ebbing and flowing.

Latersville!