Arc 9 Chapter XVIII: Devilish Dealings

Praise be to the moste vilely voracious voyeur of texts for its dread aide! It shall forever be remembered in the halls of glory.

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The first of the supposed paladins were cut down before they even knew what was going on, the majority of my followers leaping for their throats with an enthusiasm no doubt transferred through the good ole' tadpole.

I'd almost consider it useful if it wasn't so utterly disgusting.

Myself on the other hand stood back beside my fellow spell slinger and looked down at my looted grimoire, a basic thing but a well kept one non the less, and habitually read a series of glyphs off its surface even if I remembered them all perfectly.

"Bippity, boppity, bop." I deadpanned as I waved my hand with perfect precision "On your ass you flop."

In an instant, a deep tar-like blackness appeared below a quintet of the false paladins, their legs sinking into it to the knees and thus leaving them completely immobile, easy targets for our murderous lizard boi and his many shards of ice.

To my right I saw Gale look on with the kind of professional disgust only a true connoisseur could show and after firing off a series of magic bolts at the enemy (terribly uninspired spell that, and one I would have loved to have had starting out) he looked to me.

"Must you?" He asked with some exasperation.

"Yes." Scorch answered for me.

Ignoring the wisdom of the bird man I smirked "It isn't my fault you people treat magic like prayer."

"We do not." He sounded thoroughly offended now.

"No?" I tilted my head "Do you not perform a minor ritual to an energy that is not truly yours every time you cast?" Before he could confirm his utter intellectual defeat I decided "How about this..."

Faster than he could twitch, I placed a hand on his shoulder and sent just the tiniest touch of Aedric Magicka through him, effectively agitating his soul's resonance up by a level.

"Feel the flow through your body and soul." I commanded the silent and wide-eyed man.

It took him no more than two seconds to offer the slightest nod.

"Good." I smirked "Now force your will upon it. No ritual, no thought, just will."

He frowned, and then grit his teeth, but to my most positive surprise it took him five seconds before I felt the natural flow through him pause.

"Now shape it, a simple bolt." I went on, voice radiating with magical suggestion.

I had no time for a proper lecture.

"And loose." I grinned as I felt it.

With heavily dilated eyes and uneven breathing, Gale looked down onto the battlefield where my newest Tiefling recruit was battling it out with the leader of the false paladins and he threw his hand out, a bolt of pure force far more unstable yet also more powerful than he had cast before lashing out with a loud crack before slamming into the sneering man's sword hand and crunching the thing off its joint.

Gale stared at the effects of his spell, and the ensuing butchery, and then shakily fell back onto his ass, sweat pouring down his forehead.

"How does it feel to properly spellcast for once?" I grinned down at him.

"What-" He began before nervously licking his lips "What was that?"

"Pops, did you turn the most useful of the n'wahs deaf?" Scorch deadpanned.

"Shush." I flicked his forehead without looking, and ignoring the noises of betrayal I explained "I gave you the glimpse you desired, how did it feel I wonder?"

He looked like he wanted to ask me a thousand and one question more but held himself back for now with impressive control, exhaling heavily instead and looking up into the skies "Like telling a great stone to move, and it actually listening."

I couldn't help a chuckle at that "Very picturesque." With a shake of my head I added "Try replicating the feeling and deed, and I might just be tempted to instruct you with something above the level of a ten year old."

His eyes widened and then immediately narrowed as he realized the severity of the challenge before him "You are a cruel, cruel man. Reyvin Dagoth."

"Oh please." I rolled my eyes and began walking down the road and towards the retreating group of parasite enjoyers "You are relishing at the idea of doing it under your own power."

He sighed at the utter truth and just let his head fall back fully onto the paved road.

My little stroll reached its end sooner than expected as I counted all but the Tiefling among the number of those who had retreated "And what's this?" I asked.

"The Teethling." Lae'zel toyed with the word "Has gone mad."

"Something about those paladins drove her into a rage." Astarion drawled "Quite a fiery one at that." He pretend shuddered and pointed behind him.

And true to his words, a small firestorm was rising within the abandoned road toll station the knights had previously occupied, accompanied tastefully by roars of pained fury of course.

"Well that just won't do." I tutted and strolled up and through the flames.

Within I saw Karlach swinging her axe around like a complete madwoman, some kind of mildly cursed metal machine in her chest where her heart should have been pumping flames through her skin and burning everything around her.

The body of the false paladin below her was looking downright spaghetti like by now.

I plopped my ass on the burning counter desk left behind by the previous owners and waited for a few moments more before speaking "Are you quite done?"

The massive Tiefling paused in her wild swings, eyes widening as she regained some coherence and realized someone else had followed her into the inferno "Oh shit." She cursed and then saw me literally sitting in the fire "The Hells are you doing?"

"Oh this?" I quirked an eyebrow as if I only just noticed the flames and flippantly waved it off "Don't worry about it."

She looked half-tempted to return to her useless tantrum but looking down she felt whatever fury she had left leave her and then simply slumped against a nearby wall, notably one of the few that wasn't catching on fire just yet.

We had introduced each other briefly on the way here but I will admit I was curious about what could set someone off quite so literally, even if I didn't truly know her.

And like the desperate woman she was deep down, she spoke without prompting from me "Wyll wasn't completely wrong to accuse me." She said, voice bitter "I spent the last... I don't even know how many years fighting as a gladiator for an Archdevil against my will."

"Zariel, was it?" I quirked an eyebrow.

"That bitch." She spat out "And when I finally got to escape, she already had her dogs waiting for me. Like she knew exactly where I'd be."

"Like a petulant child losing its favored toy." I drawled and hearing Karlach's ensuing huff of disgust I added "Hit the nail on the head there, didn't I?"

"Couldn't have said it better myself." She laughed bitterly "The bitch will probably never stop until I am dead."

"I suspect not." I hummed and hopped off my crumbling seat, walking over to the exhausted woman and offering my hand "Though I suspect she may find her pursuit difficult while I am around." I smirked and for the briefest moment my face flashed with all the cruelty I had reserved specifically for Zariel's type of filth.

Karlach stared into my eyes for a long moment before offering a slightly forced grin of her own "Lead the way then, soldier." Grabbing my hand and letting herself be hoisted up onto her feet.

For whatever reason she looked down at my hand with confusion in her eyes.

'Did she think my hand would burn when my ass didn't?' I almost snorted at the thought.

The others looked mostly relieved as the two of us stepped out, and wisely did not bombard us with any questions. All save for Wyll, who for whatever reason looked like he was preparing for his own execution.

I chose not to speak on it for the moment and simply decided to quietly monitor him.

Feeling just a touch generous to the lost Tiefling I decided to distract the group further by killing the rising wildfire and pointing them at the loot-filled cellar of the place and telling them to go wild.

Which thankfully held more than the most basic arms and armor and the lot of them finally stopped looking like a raggedy group of highwaymen and closer to something resembling a cheap mercenary.

If you squinted.

Though I quickly regretted my hint as Scorch informed me they were too distracted by his 'grand magnificence' to complete their actual original task.

Well, regret might be a strong word.

On the one hand they didn't perform a scouting operation I could literally do by staring slightly harder than usual.

On the other hand, they didn't quite alert the goblins to their ensuing fate.

Put like that I was feeling distinctly forgiving. It wouldn't do for the vermin to escape before the appointed time after all.

No matter, I let the party gather themselves and then we began our march back to Moonhaven, only to pause at the distant sounds of fiery explosions and... barking?

"More gnolls." Shadowheart said with disgust.

"Met some already?" I asked.

"A small patrol." She answered "They ambushed a caravan. There were no bodies left."

"But plenty of blood." And who could add that but the vampire?

'Man eaters then.' I mused "It is only proper we avenge the poor travelers, no?"

And to my surprise there was literally 0 protest to another detour, as even Lae'zel seemed to have a goblin-tier disgust aimed towards the hyena-like creatures.

Once we reached the source of the noise and I got one good look at them with all my senses and promptly decided they had surpassed my disgust with the filth that was the goblin and went even beyond that.

The sheer aura of bestial cruelty and depraved hunger reminded me of Namira of all creatures.

There was but one sentence such vileness deserved and I named it gladly "Scorch."

My followers got to observe in most morbid fascination as my Glorious Golden Boy proceeded to utterly annihilate the group of three dozen hyena men, taking deliberate care to inflict as much suffering as he could without wasting too much time.

Many had looked away by the time he was done, the pained yips and yelps and whimpers drawing empathy from even some of the more hardened killers among their number.

Me and Durge though? We observed his work with learned eyes, and found it to be good.

"What in the gods' name is that thing?" Wyll muttered in horror.

"My familiar." I said, turning away from Scorch "I believe I already told you that."

"How did you come to tame such a beast?" He asked.

"Tame?" I tilted my head "Scorch is a part of me."

That seemed to confuse (and mildly horrify) the lot of them, and I was promptly bombarded by a wall of questions.

"You've seen how I behave towards those I feel deserve it, have you not?" I asked simply which shut them up "Scorch is all that, just without any of the restraints."

"But that is enough questioning for now." I said with a pointed look "He appears to be done."

And he was indeed, the gnoll corpses now nicely piled up and burning their stench away in glorious golden flame.

But that was not what I was focused on and instead looked down into the cave the hyena men were besieging to find a pair of lightly armored men armed with crossbows and what looked to be phials of some kind of alchemical mixture.

'A molotov-esque mix?' I mused as I looked down at he burned ground at the cave's entrance.

"Zhentarim." I heard Astarion mutter.

"Hm?" I looked to him with a raised eyebrow.

"A Baldur's Gate based... business association." He said, quite plainly meaning they were a gang or criminal organization of some sort "Very useful to have handy."

"Then go forth and get them handy." I shooed him on "I'm not in the mood for street thug doublespeak at the moment."

The vampire chuckled and quickly asked Durge and Shadowheart to follow him.

Wise.

Wyll, who was looking increasingly nervous about what was coming, walked up to me and asked "Did you manage to find out anything about Kagha's dealings?"

He was quite obviously desperate for a distraction "Her betrayal has been confirmed." I nodded "When we return, preferably with Halsin on our side, she will face consequences."

"Good." The man nodded to himself "At least the Tieflings will have safety."

"You doubt my guarantee?" I wasn't truly offended by the insinuation, that would take effort after all.

He shook his head, only a hint of apology in his expression "Of course not, I'm just glad they have a place to stay."

"They will still have to leave due to food constraints." I pointed out "No matter if the druids are suddenly nice and welcoming."

He frowned "Can they not hunt for food?"

I looked at him long and hard "You'd think a noble would understand boundaries, but I suppose I can't blame you for being addled. Whatever sword hangs over your neck seems to be sharp indeed."

His lips thinned and he looked away "I will... explain. Once we are camped."

"That is your prerogative." I ever so slightly inclined my head.

"You said something about boundaries?" He asked, once more reaching for a distraction.

"There is a difference between the druids offering hospitality." I explained patiently as I watched, and listened in, on Astarion haggling with the Zhentarim members and extorting them for money for services rendered "And the Tieflings pillaging their lands."

"As much as I dislike the treehuggers on principle." I sighed "You can't deny this is their domain, and to invade it as you suggest would justify Kagha's decisions near completely."

I looked him directly in the eye "You can only help others once you have ensured your own survival, anything else is idiocy."

That seemed enough to leave the self righteous adventurer to some contemplation, hopefully it would be enough to jog his brain into a bit more action but I shall alas keep my expectations reasonable.

The negotiations were finished quickly enough, and while they looked annoyed, the two... rogues?

Well, if the shoe fits and all that.

The two rogues were actually quite satisfied with their assured safety and even gave us a local point of contact that might prove useful before striding away, still looking at us, and mostly Scorch, with caution.

Seeing as the sun was slowly starting to lower in the distance, it was decided we would return to Moonhaven for the evening, and we spent the return march talking about what we discovered.

My retelling of the hag's death naturally surprised the hell out of them, and doubly so as they heard of me directing her victims to the grove.

Durge seemed the most put out by the revelation of Auntie Ethel's true nature.

Truly, anyone who offered you free food only for you to find out it wasn't quite as free as you expected was the epitome of evil!

Karlach seemed to have started relaxing somewhat at least on the way, especially since my tale rose her confidence in my words not just being platitudes to calm her down back at the toll station.

The poor girl really went through a lot of shit, didn't she? 

I almost hoped this Zariel would show its face. Burning it off would be quite satisfying.

No point in daydreaming about it though, for another concern greeted me as we ascended into the ruined stone village.

"Scorch." I said with some annoyance.

"Yes pops?" He chirped as he appeared atop my shoulder.

"What did I say about leaving a mess after you are done?" I asked.

He looked away "Not to?"

"Then get to work you gods damned bag of pillow material!" I flicked his head and he flew away before I could properly yeet him.

"A twenty year old baby, that is what he is." I grumbled and turned to my amused following "Let's set up camp, the stench should disappear soon enough."

That was thankfully enough to get them moving again and soon enough we had established a cozy little campsite just under the village's windmill.

One moment we were relaxing, and the next Wyll had stepped up to the campfire, drawing everyone's attention. His nerves seemed to be at an all time high but he held himself with... admirable spine.

"I have a confession to make." He spoke simply as the rest gathered, sending an apologetic look at Karlach "I am bound to a devil, and my patron wanted me to hunt you down. She is probably going to extract her punishment now that I have failed."

"The Blade of Frontiers, a warlock?" Shadowheart asked with subtle mockery "How unbelievable."

The Tiefling woman on the other hand looked at the man with completely new eyes, and nearly went up to hug his lungs out before realizing he wasn't quite as fire immune as myself.

In the end she choked down whatever else she wanted to say but a simple "You are a good man, Wyll. Thanks."

He offered a weak smile and went to say something else.

But that was exactly when just a few steps away from him a dark circle of magic carrying the same stench that followed the nautiloid's exit formed seemingly on its own, though I noticed it tugged at some connection it had to Wyll himself.

And out from within it stood a tall statuesque woman with a crown of four tall horns, wearing a fine dress that accentuated all the right bits.

She even went as far as to have the good taste to have proper grey skin!

However there was one detail that drew the eye more than anything else, and seeing it I knew there was but one thing to say to the new arrival.

"Of course the devil is a fucking ginger." I scoffed.