December Plans

Hey everyone.

I'm going to try not to be as self-depricating as possible in this post, but recently I've come to the conclusion that my work is lacking. Not that I've ever not felt that way, but in the past few months I've seen a sharp decline in quality and a sharper decline in viewership of my drawings. Part of that of course is that in the past year I've been banned twice on Twitter and I've never been able to recover the followers, but I can't just blame being shadowbanned for that.

Lately I've been struggling with staying focused, which slows down my work. I've been demotivated for various reasons; low viewer engagement, low satisfaction with my own work, getting very few commissions, etc. And while I'm not in any danger financially, it's only because I have family and friends to lean on in that respect, so I feel like a burden.

All of this is to say, for December I won't be doing anything directly with this Fanbox. I will still post when I have something to post, and I will keep the tiers up for those kind enough to keep supporting me, but again there will be no polls or suggestion gathering or theme works. I will be concentrating on what few commissions I do get and personal projects.

Part of me feels like this is counter-intuitive. If I need money and I'm struggling with popularity and work satisfaction, shouldn't I be trying even harder? But the truth is I'm very tired. This time of year has historically been the worst for me for mental health, AND physical health, and I don't feel like I can add more strain and expect good results. I know that I desperately need help; I feel that deeply. But for the life of me I don't know what that means or what it entails. I'm not "taking a break". I've BEEN on break for the better part of a year, and it's not helping. If anything, I suppose you could say I'm going on autopilot mode. Not because I think it will help, but because I can't think of anything else to do TO help.

I'm truly sorry for any inconvenience this will cause anyone, although I'm sure that's minimal. If you feel that you are not getting your money's worth supporting me, please make sure to unsubscribe before the end of this month so it does not renew in December.

As always, thank you to everyone who's supported me and continues to support me.