LARP 2.14 - Defiance

As I made my way further into the Heights, and made my way to my 'stronghold,' I realized that it really wasn't much to look at. In fact, it was just an open field in a valley, nestled between the two valley walls filled with hastily constructed squatter's housing.

Here was where the elves and dwarves and humans of the continent had fled, in the city of Cliffside. I had no way to charge tickets, nor did they have money to pay. (Part of me, a distant part of me, thought -- oh, how clever, Zoe is giving my character a big audience, without tons of money). But the actual visceral reaction I had was one of sadness. Here were countless people, detached from their future, detached from their hope. I was just one person who could sometimes come by and provide a moment of reprieve.

And as I went through this throng of people, I could feel my misgivings about my body melting away. Yes, I was a woman -- and yes, some of the men looked at me with longing -- but for the people here, they were looking to a friend, a source of hope, as I sat down and began to play for them, to wind away our time of the fading sun.

I wanted a song that addressed their heartache, their sadness, their desperation -- but also their resolve, their resilience.

The words came to me:

I’ve seen the darkness to the east,

I remember when hope there ceased.

They called us horrors, monsters, vile,

But our love will hold the while -- 

Even as I sang, I felt a cold chill wash over me. I could remember seeing them. The army of Rowlandson, riding on. We -- the elves, the dwarves, the humans, all of us -- were unprepared for the invasion. I could feel my heart racing, the memories coming so strong it was like I could feel the hoofbeats landing across the fields.

I had to keep singing.

We will rise

We will fight

Through the shadow

Through the night

We are the defiant

We become the giant

When they come for us with flame

They will not forget our name

They may want us gone

But come again, we are the dawn

I looked down to see a dwarf child clapping along to the song. Her body small and frail, but in these moments, I felt like we were here together, feeling this hope together.

Hand in hand, we face the storm,

But it's our love that keeps us warm. 

I sang, before just letting my lute play for a time, feeling more memories washing over me.

The desperate wait for more ships to flee the city -- the smoke on the horizon as the army of Rowlandson broke through.

Many of us were there, still jumping onto whatever small dinghy we could to escape the city as they came. I could still smell the smoke, now, thinking back on it -- could still hear the wailing of separated families.

I was there when the horses fell, 

I can hear the sadness still, 

I was there when the city fell,

I can hear the sadness still,

Our queen may have lost her crown,

But we still remain unbound.

I nearly had to wipe a tear away as I finished the song.

I swallowed, and whispered quietly to myself, "If you think tragic backstories will be enough to make me leave your world, Zoe, you're wrong -- I still love it here."

Even though I could feel heartbreak in saying the words. Why was Zoe's world so harsh?