lushaani

Weekly Draws - May 25th! (Horror Pic Warning)

Added 2024-05-25 19:13:04 +0000 UTC

Alright, so, time to start getting back into a commission swing.

And just some momentum for drawing in general. Did some mayternity brainstorming, took a couple commissions, and drew some zombies. Still trying to balance mental health and work pace this week!

Speaking of...

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I've been doing a lot of thinking about my relationship to my work the past few days. My goals is definitely to still become a visual novel and game developer. But, I'm still trying to learn how to balance my life and mental health to make that conducive. My habits of perfectionism, anxieties over my ability to make decisions, and multi-layered concerns about failure or alienating my audience made the first attempt difficult.

I learned a lot, lots of about Object Oriented Programming, Image Composites, and Renpy's library. I think I totally could make something fun. Whether it be short or really long. BUT- my mental health is clearly holding me back. My fear of commitment or doing something "wrong" keeping me from just having fun and dedicating myself to one project to it's completion.

I'm not sure how to fix it... but I'm working on it. I've boiled down that a big part of my fear- is that by picking one idea, that means I can't do another. Which is technically true- but choosing to do neither idea isn't helpful.

We'll see! We'll see...