Remember When... (short story)

Remember When...

Written by SteeleBlazer

Hey boys remember when in high school you used to strut about the weight room like you owned the place... How you thought you all were big and strong...

Well, now I’m bigger and stronger than all you little boys...

I’m large and in charge now...

Just look at me and my Mighty Female Muscles!

Do you remember me?

I was that perky little cheerleader cheering you on from the sidelines.

Do you remember when you all would laugh and joke and tease all the smaller and weaker boys in the weight room?

Do you remember what you said to them and what you called them?

You said they were weak like little girls, that had had weak girly muscles and that they lifted small tiny little girly weights.

But LOOK AT ME!

LOOK AT MY GIRLY MUSCLES!

They’re so much bigger than yours! Bigger than what yours ever were and ever will be!

My GIRLY MUSCLES ARE BIGGER AND HARDER AND STRONGER than your weak and pathetic manly muscles.

And I got these great big, gigantic girly muscles by lifting girly weights.

Big, heavy girly weights!

Bet you all wish you had girly muscles now don’t you... Well, you can’t, cos you’d need to be able to lift the big heavy girly weights, and you boys are just too weak to do that.

Girly weights and girly muscles are just for us GIRLS!

And you’re just lucky high school is over... Just like the days of you ruling the school and weight room... Because Mighty Female Muscles are taking over!

You were the big men on campus, but you’re tiny and weak next to me.

You were the jocks, and I was just the tiny little cheerleader, but now compared to me and my Mighty Female muscles, you’re more of a joke than a jock...

Look at my arms, so much bigger and thicker and harder than yours.

You call that a bicep, I call that a joke!

Look at my legs, so much harder and thicker and bigger!

Do you even lift bro!

Why it looks like you boys didn’t just skip leg day, but ALL THE DAYS!

I’m so much bigger and stronger than you all now!

I’m not the little girly cheerleader.

I’m a Woman with Mighty Female Muscles!

And I’m done cheering you boys on.

And you boys better make way, cos I’m coming through and I’ll stiff-arm and strong-arm any man that stands in my way.

Remember when you thought girls were the weaker sex! Men are the weaker sex, and trust me you wouldn’t want to find me on the football field now.

Because I hit like a girl.

And I hit way harder than all of you!

You tackle like a girl is no longer an insult but a compliment!

And you boys wish you could hit like a girl.

Cos no one hits harder than us GIRLS!

But you can’t cos you jocks are all jokes!

Look at this girly muscle.

Look at how it's so much bigger than yours.

Look at me now. I’m not the little cheerleader.

I’m fully grown and fully built. I have shoulders wider than any linebacker, wider than even when you’re wearing those football pads of yours...

Only I don’t need pads or protection, but you’d need all the protection you’d get, cos I’ll run all over you.

Because, I don't just have girly muscles anymore. I have Mighty Female Muscles. And let me tell you something. These muscles? They're stronger than any man's. Strong enough to dominate on the football field.

So, I want to hear you cheering me on!

Cheering me on and my Mighty Female Muscles!

I’ll give you a flex and you give me AN

B    I   C   E   P

And what’s that spell?

BICEP! Cos my biceps are so much bigger than yours!

Do you take offense that my muscles are stronger than any offensive line.

That you have no defense against me and my superior and stronger feminine might!

That I’d take you all down faster than a cheerleader on prom night.

That I’d sack you and your balls, dominating you over and over again.

Hate to break it to you boys, but I hit like a girl.

And I hit way, way harder than any of you.

So sorry, boys. I hate to bust your balls about you being weaker than me, but it's true. Nothing, and I mean nothing, is stronger than mighty female muscles.

Okay... Maybe I’m not sorry...

And maybe I like busting your balls!

So, tell me do you remember when men used to be stronger than us girls and our Mighty Female Muscles…

Those days are long gone!