and the world's sickest cunt award goes to

spent 30 minutes writing a bunch of HORSESHIT so had to leave it in the drafts... maybe i'll rework it into something worth reading. not that i actually want you to read any of the sick podcast, bro that spills out of my mouth of course, but i do format and style it to be readable just in case..

here's the fundamental problem with being hardcore: it's only impressive to other hardcores.. so when you come thru the other side of all the bullshit and the toil pays off and you achieve the impossible, and finally become the world's sickest cunt at something, it's a fairly hollow experience, as there are very few equipt to recognize it.. in fact being the sickest cunt really doesn't get you much. not to say that i'm the world's sickest cunt ofc.. but at the risk of sounding conceited i've got a few rare qualities you simply will not see many people out there capable of doing.. not that such a thing matters of course

the 2010's was a pretty bleak time, not that this decade is in any way better, but a lot of layers of the façade have now been peeled off and what a cynical farce it all is is fairly laid bare. no one is even pretending that there is a society anymore. but one of the big preoccupations of the 10's was all this self improovement horseshit, which no doubt came to fore as social mobility and eventually living standards in the west began to nosedive. it could all be solved by doing reps in the fucking gym and meal planning and listening to malcolm gladwell audio books and going keto. we all knew it was horseshit at the time too, but it permeated everything to such a degree that these attitudes were inescapable. seriously everyone was in the fucking gym squatting and doing stronglifts for all of the 2010's, myself included. no idea why. art grindsetters were especially susceptible (i was a serious conceptart grindsetter).

the prevailing wisdom, and in retrospect this so embarrassingly cringe and obviously completely fucking stupid, but it was to make yourself IRREPLACEABLE by becoming SUPERLATIVE and EMINENT in your field. So yeah just enter the 0.0001% of skill bro and you'll always have job security. So this was something a lot of us, i mean, a lot of people, internalized from places like concepart dot org, cghub, crimzon daggers, /ic/ and concept art facebook groups.. the types of places grindsetters would congregate. the answer to any roadblock you encountered was a deficiency in skill, and it could only be remedied by grindsetting. once you're the sickest cunt the world will lavish praise and reward on you and it will have paid o.ff.

Once upon a time in a bookstore (Rönnels Antikvariat) i found a pretty interesting book, the Letters of Mozart. There's a drawing by W. A. himself on the cover, well worth cover price for that alone.. Anyway it starts off cheerfully enough with 14 year old Wolferl on one of the Italian tours being inducted into the Bolognese Music Academy or knighted by the Pope or something along those lines. But by the end, it's the harrowing story of the world's greatest artistic genius, basically dictionary definition of, slowly expiring of illness, destitute, penniless, overworked, mailing letters left and right to wealthy patrons asking for loans and advances until he eventually dies in a ditch at my exact current age. Can't quite put a finger on it, but even tho I read it over a decade ago, it was on my mind often in 2024... Might have been because he laid out his work schedule and mentioned that he also only slept 5 hours per night... but for sure. one of, if not, history's sickest cunts at improvising on keyboard and composing music..

ty for making it to the end of my sick ass podcast here is your reward. is this not the most incredible set and costume design you've ever seen? exquisitely rococo.. yet stripped back and modern.. do listen to the opening aria too, it's exceedingly witty... in the manner that only a mozart aria can be..