Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero: 151: Interlude: Tanis

Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero: 151: Interlude: Tanis

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Commissioned by Shaderic

Wordcount: 2500

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Lady Kurama gave a soft hum, as she read through my request, and when she nodded I let loose a sigh of relief.

“Oh, come now. Did you think that I’d refuse to give you the funds you need to do your work?” Her eyes glittered with mischief and her lips curled into a smile. Even bereft of teeth, I couldn’t help but shiver. She had something planned, or wanted something. “It might be a lot, but it’s nothing a favor between friends can’t put into motion.”

I did my best to straighten my back at her words, but when Kurama giggled, I knew that I had no choice.

“Very well, if it can be done, then it shall be.”

“Oh, good! Then, I’d like for you to assist my husband more directly. I heard that you once worked in the same room together all day. Why not try it again?” Lady Kurama suggested and one of her Kunoichi immediately appeared. The esteemed warrior despondently held her head in her hands. So, this was how it was. Lord Hachiman’s wife was conniving towards getting as many women ready and eager for her husband in preparation for victory. “I’ve prepared I wonderful uniform with the help of A’Bel that I’m sure Hachiman will enjoy!”

Although I was surprised that the scarlet-haired, ever-smiling Kitsune didn’t simply produce a collar from one of her drawers, I could only sigh at what she did provide.

It was a heavily modified version of the uniform we utilized in the office. However, the skirt was transformed from thigh-length to barely cresting over the crotch, while the blouse beneath the jacket was outright gone. The jacket itself only had one button and it was positioned a few inches above the belly button, ensuring the complete showcase of chest and abdomen at any given opportunity.

I could only dryly look at the uniform for a second, before losing my composure and addressing Kurama as a friend instead of my superior.

“What? No crotchless panties or nipple-exposing bra?”

“The only underwear allowed is a smile. Toys only after Hachiman has shaped you properly. Piercings if he likes them.”

I nodded at her words, before providing an answer.

She’s been like this since Hachiman declared his intention to stop being chaste after victory.

“Kurama, you should speak to your mother about this disturbing fetish. Everyone is worried about you not wanting to be your husband’s first.”

“My mother wouldn’t understand! We’re different people. And, everyone should worry about my desire to be Hachiman’s loving wife not being met, instead!”

“Kurama, being the woman who cleans other women off him and licks up whatever’s spilled out of his lovers isn’t being a loving wife.”

“This is MY marriage, I am the wife, and I know what I want!” Kurama levelled a glare at me and the glared at the Kunoichi fake-sobbing in the corner. She pointed aggressively at her personal guard. “This insistence that I be his first is treachery of the highest degree! Have you lot even considered how Ur would feel!?”

I held up my hands at that accusation and defended myself.

“It’s been accepted that she’ll be with him first. There’s no possible way that she wouldn’t even with A’Bel put into strong consideration.” I ran the numbers and possibilities in the back of my mind. All the statistics pointed towards my stated conclusion, but it never hurt to double-check my work. My notes on the matter were secure in my bedroom. “Henri is the only possible contender, but she came on too strong in Lua’Kona. The wildcard who sent herself careening into the abyss, but with every intention of clawing her way to the top.”

“Whatever the case, I should at least be fourth!” Kurama stood up and bit at her thumb as she considered her circumstances. Once more, she glared at the Kunoichi that revealed herself. I wondered if she ordered them to— “I’d be much farther down, if my own guard weren’t so insistent on ruining my desires!”

Of course, she’d try to have her entire retinue of guards be with Hachiman before herself.

That’s simply how Kurama is.

“But enough about that. Even if you’ve seen through my plans, for your request to go through, you must agree to this change in uniform!” Kurama shook her head after looking upon Ylstu through her office window. Sometimes, even with her triumphant work in the background, I couldn’t believe my friend accomplished so much. Her degenerate desires demeaned her that much. I’m sure that she enjoyed it. “No matter how much you and everyone else tries to resist, I remain the lady of this land! If you want your funding increased ahead of time, then you WILL do your best to be impregnated by my husband and turned into one of his loving wives!”

I scratched my cheek at Kurama’s direction.

This situation was far better than the norm. Most Kindred nobility loathed to share their husbands.

However, Kurama’s reaction was immensely overblown in the opposite direction to the point that there wasn’t even a thrill having sex with her husband.

What’s the point, if the other woman wants to see it happen?

If Hachiman were a normal man, I’m sure that fact would’ve turned away many.
Luckily for us, and unfortunately for him, his quality was so high that Kurama’s fetishes on the matter could simply be ignored.

…

“Tanis.”

“Bekat.”

I greeted my fellow administrator with a nod, as I settled next to her. The Wolf Howl was a tavern that most of my staff and I frequented. It had closed during the war. However, its lease was frozen, supplies purchased for the war, and it was included in the influx of money Hachiman had sent into Ylstu after our victory, so it opened quickly and returned to being a prime spot for me and my compatriots to gather.

That number included the Anubis, who wore her country’s traditional clothes, albeit with some more fabric added to the torso to protect her more from the elements.

I raised a hand towards rose and pointed at the meal on offer on the menu.

“The whole roast chicken and a loaf of bread, please.”

“You got it, Tanis!” Rose was a red-haired Beast with tanned skin and golden eyes. She was a very capable cook and tavern owner. Not only that, but she attended many of the classes Hachiman had for business owners. Her success on the financial front and the service front made it so that she was already having a second tavern built along the main route between Ylstu and the rest of the Kindred empire. Without moments she pried off a chicken from a roasting spit, placed it on a tray of roasted vegetables, and took a warm loaf of hearty bread from a heated box. “No drinks, tonight?”

“Just dinner and a break. Lots of work to do, even while everyone celebrates.”

“Ah, all-nighters again! Tell everyone that I’ll keep the tavern open for them and a few chickens in reserve!”

“Thank you, they’ll appreciate that.”

“Hah, I’m sure they will. My roasts are the best!”

With that the dog-eared girl turned away to speak to another of her customers, leaving me to eat a meal I couldn’t have imagined having regularly as a child, and Bekat addressed me.

“Had I been told that a battle of legend took place a day’s walk from here now, I wouldn’t be able to believe it.” The Anubis spoke and I nodded at her words. Once upon a time, the meal I would be eating would be shared between me and the rest of my clutch. As the runt, I’d get the least and go hungrier than the rest. However, the simple fact was that we were always hungry and yearning for more. With that hunger in mind, with my current clarity and control, I was surprised that I had the willpower to choose my path and not become a roving warrior searching for mates like the rest of my tribe. “Ylstu’s victory is total.”

“Not if you heard it from Hachiman. Or have seen the ledgers. We’re going to make up the money, especially with all the magical arms and armor that we’ve salvaged, but it’ll take time.”

“Time that we will get by Lord Hachiman’s insistence to have a vacation and a monthlong celebration.” The Anubis spoke and I stayed silent. I wasn’t telling her everything. She was technically from a foreign nation, so her talents were used, but she did not know everything that Ylstu did. She was assigned to work on grand projects that could make use of her skills and impress the Pharaoh she swore her allegiance to. I wouldn’t place her anywhere that kept secrets, until she succumbed to our lord. “His wisdom is carefully hidden by the exterior that he hides behind.”

I took a moment to chew my food thoroughly, before speaking to the Anubis once more.

“…sure.” Lord Hachiman was most certainly not hiding behind anything. Perhaps, he was holding back terrors and fears from his time on the battlefield, but he certainly not pretending to be someone who he was not. I had no reason to believe that my lord was not an absurdly irreverent individual. One that made every dominant Kindred want to make him sing their praises, and one that made every submissive Kindred want to roll over and present themselves with utter glee. This one didn’t know, since Hachiman kept her at a distance. “That might be the case.”

The Anubis preened at the praise.

Yes, the moment she spends any time with him and does anything earnest, she’ll melt into a puddle.
Given the expansions to the bureaucracy set to occur, that might be within a few days.

I could only hope.

We needed more people.

…

Hachiman looked over the cost and estimates of the upcoming expansions, sighed, and then shook his head.

“Yeah, this can’t continue. We need more processing power. Training up and taking the most talented people isn’t enough.” Hachiman wore a white button shirt. His jacket was discarded and his tie undone, while he looked over form after form with a fierce glare. In my time in the capital, I spied many men clad in little more than straps of rope. I’d paid them a glance or two, but I could barely hold myself back from clambering atop Hachiman. He had one button undone and I could see a bit of his shoulder… and some clavicle! “Did anyone respond to our calls about artificers?”

“Yes. One. One that was determined to come, despite the war, after seeing your promised budget.”

“Sounds like the kind of crazy person we need.” Hachiman nodded. “Have you prepared the equipment and supplies for the project?”

“Yes. Everything is ready. Approximately twelve Automata can be produced, and Lady Henri has finished studying the basics to be capable enough of verifying whatever work is done.” This project took much time. Hachiman had judged it to be too large of a risk with his resources. However, with the costs of expanding the bureaucracy even further increasing, I agreed with his view that it was now worth the risk. “For your peace of mind, most of the Golems that I have spoken with are quite happy. I am sure that many of the Automata you have forged will be willing to do as you ask.”

“The Golems were made for manual labor and were given just enough intelligence to do their jobs well. You’ve seen their testing results. They’re not going to be taking up any clerical positions.” Hachiman grunted and shook his head. I knew what he was implying, even though he prevented himself from saying it. Their lower-than-average intellect made it easy for them to accept their current circumstances.  “We’re going to be creating Automata meant to process stupendous amounts of information in conjunction with whole departments. They need to be smart, trustworthy, and willing to do what we ask without their lives on the lines. We’re already cheating by making someone’s who smart.”

“Therefore, it will be a gamble whether they’ll also have the latter two traits. I see.” Hachiman’s concerns had a basis. Artificers who created Automata and forced them into servitude rarely had favorable ends. There’s a reason why some Artificers suddenly disappear, along with most of their wealth, tools, and “loyal” servant. Hachiman was already ensuring that he would not disappear by not forcing loyalty upon the creatures he was having made. Or, so I believed would be the case. “Still, you’ve judged the risk acceptable…”

“Yeah, I did. Even if only one of them accept, giving your department a mechanical mind capable of running all the numbers properly would be worth it.” Hachiman nodded and then laid his eyes on mine. My breathing quickened and some part of my mind went back to Kurama’s presented uniform. Was this her plan all along? Was she sowing the seeds of my fall by presenting such ideas right before I met directly with Hachiman? Was that bitch that much of a cunning submissive!? “Hm? Do you have something to say about that plan?”

“N-none at all. It’s fine. I was simply lost in my thoughts.” Because of Kurama, I was going to have to change underwear after this meeting. I usually had to already, but the thought of Kurama having a hand in it infuriated me. Which was probably what the Kitsune wanted, however, she made a mistake: she thought that I could only think of one way to get back at her. With a full stomach and my sexual urges in check, I could easily come up with a more proper vengeance. “By the way, Kurama has been quite excited about your proclamation. Have you thought of names for your children yet?”

Hachiman sputtered and found himself tongue-tied.

I apologized to my beloved leader in my head, but this was the best way for me to get back at Kurama.

I want to see her try and fulfill her depraved fetish to be the bottom of the pile when Hachiman brings up baby names!