Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero: 125

Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero: 125

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Commissioned by Shaderic

Wordcount: 2500

…

I’m fairly sure my current tactics could be explained and executed better by someone else. Hell, I’m sure that that someone could probably get everything done cheaper and earlier than I’m doing now with the assets that Roseanne had. Maybe, they’d have gotten away with just the bulletin boards and the schools, or perhaps they’d have gotten things done with just flyers and my transports. A genius would’ve probably pulled off using merchants all over Kindred lands to sow just the right rumors everywhere to get things done at the earliest possible time and for as little cost as possible.

But I’m not a genius.

Hell, I’m barely a half-decent military commander and I’m pretty sure all my success as a noble is because I have centuries of innovations and educational development backing me if. Most, if not all, of my noble colleagues could probably do better than me with my assets at their disposal, and without having to kowtow to Roseanne. They’d use everything I had to propel themselves into the stratosphere and get everything that they wanted, while assuming as little responsibility as possible and working less than they did at the start.

Unfortunately, all I’ve got is a willingness to break rules, grind myself into dust, and a willingness to spend as much as possible for a sure victory.

That’s where the schools, postal service, bulletin boards, and new markets came into the picture. Someone better than me could’ve pulled off the current plan with less, but with everything in that’s set into place and they widespread adoption of the new systems, what Roseanne and I now had at our disposal was an indomitable juggernaut in terms of spreading her influence to the populace.

For a long time, she’s had to work carefully with her influence and pick her battles against her nobility, but now that wasn’t the case. Her voice, her wishes, and her desires for the people under her rule could now reach those people, and they’ll listen to her. Since she’s rescued me, she’s made their lives better given them more opportunity to advance, and kept a firmer hand upon their masters. Many Kindred have gone from living in huts and dugouts to fabricated housing in large containers massed at the capital and flown over to their lands, and they’ve been told of their rights, and those rights have been protected.

The perfect message for Roseanne was that she was fighting for them against the nobility that wished to take those rights from them, that people were trying to strip her agent of his power after he undid a corrupt household that sold Kindred to the Empire, and that if they did nothing they would lose what they have gained and returned to what they once had.

But, if they rallied to her, if they refused to work, and if they accepted her protections, then there was a chance that they’d keep what they now had.

If Kindred were humans, I would be sure that not enough time would have passed for this to work.

But, from what I’ve seen of Ylstu, the Kindred are more fiercely protective of their luxuries and necessities after they’ve been met. They don’t just want, they desire, and that desire is something that drives them forward. They’re greedy, lustful, and jealous creatures that work themselves to the bone to get what they believe they deserve… and hate the concept of what they like being taken away. Give a Kindred incentives, a home, and their necessities… and that Kindred will fight to the death to protect every single ounce of what they had.

They were monsters unwilling to receive less than what they’ve earned… and that worked to Roseanne’s advantage. With a single propaganda campaign at my direction, Roseanne nearly set her lands alight in a revolution under her name. If we didn’t step in to stop it from getting out of hand, I was sure that she’d have become an absolute monarch with no peers or aristocracy to call upon, as the masses would’ve given up their lives in mass to bury the aristocracy with sheer numbers.

What’s that?

You’re sure that I wanted that to happen since the relationship between the peasantry and the aristocracy is just slavery with extra steps?

That’s ridiculous.

Why would I dismantle a system that’s already falling apart and disrupt my reinforcement lines?

I’d be working harder and making my life in the future more difficult.

It’s much easier and safer to destabilize the current Kindred society slowly and have the aristocracy just give up or be forced into obscurity.

I mean, I’d enjoy seeing a peasant revolt all over Kindred lands and a lot of my fellow nobles lose everything for being assholes, but I had responsibilities as the leader of Ylstu.

Such a thing happening would put my people in danger, so I couldn’t let it happen even if I wanted to happen.

Okay, fine.

I wanted it to happen.

I just couldn’t let it.

Personal responsibilities suck.

…

Roseanne was displeased with my suggestion nearly burning down her empire and turning her into a god-emperor of Kindred kind, so I was left to handle some minor details like “stabilize certain territories” and “assure the nobility that they weren’t going to die.” So, I found myself stuck behind a desk in a room at the palace to hear complaints from noble houses, and make them feel less bad about nearly getting dragged out of their castles and chopped to bits by their peasantry-turned-zealots.

The first few messengers were pretty threatening and the letters they carried were appropriately worded, but Kindred were Kindred, and when they realized I was stuck in a room to listen to them… the nobles arrived themselves or with their daughters. For a woman who wanted to give men rights amongst the Kindred, Roseanne sure was ready to throw me into the piranha tank when given the slightest reason.

Anyway, Roseanne gave me a budget for bribes, gifts, and hush money, while the nobility demanded entire divisions of troops, castles, or to get bent over the table right now. It was my job to be intimidating, to make it clear that we were going to do it again if they keep trying to stir shit up, and firmly, but politely introduce the lewder ones to Ur, Ashe, Reiser, and A’Bel.

Of course, the more reasonable ones were told that there will be a place for them in the future, and that elite Kindred with experience, money, and power were always going to be needed. While I would certainly like to just cut them down and do away with them, Roseanne wanted to reform them into elite cadres that basically operated in their own circles, while the rest of society developed. They’ll have influence and voices on the new laws, especially laws that concern them, as the peasantry will. And, not only that, but Roseanne wanted their wealth to be reinjected safely into the economy through banking, owning large fields, and domestic trade routes.

The future of Kindred aristocracy was bright under Roseanne’s vision, and if they refused it, they’ll face someone who wanted them dead.

Many were mollified, a few glared at me, some told me to step on them, and a few just walked out silently.

Each one was monitored now, and if they were up to something, they’ll be taken out with barely any chance of anyone coming to avenge them.

Well, maybe they can try to become martyrs, but with the populace against them and the moderates content with the promises offered… it wouldn’t be martyrdom.

Just suicide with more flair to an audience that wouldn’t care.

In the end, it was a lot of work that I would’ve rather not have had to deal with, but couldn’t refuse not to do.

Still, though, it got interesting when my mother-in-law came around.

…

“How are you alive?”

“Mostly because I want to see the Empire burn, kinda because I want to be, but a little because I’m actually surrounded by decent people that I like.”

“Hilarious, but you know what I mean. You must know that assassins are after you from every direction. Not just the kind that will steal you away to their hidden villages and keep you forever, but actual killers.” The Kuzonoha matriarch grimaced and looked around my office. Then, she snapped her fingers and Kunoichi came forth from her shadow. They were older than mine, which meant they were just curvier and little else, and they met the gazes of their younger colleagues. “I’d expected you to ask for assistance against them, but it appears you’re doing fairly well.”

“I’ve got more than a few people protecting me from attempts on my life, and I’ve got a magical artifact or two to keep me from dying.” I stayed behind my desk and looked over the list of my future appointments. I was booked for another four weeks. Most of the remaining appointments were with nobles who just had concerns. Roseanne and I didn’t release the propaganda full-bore on all the territories. That would’ve made the entire affair impossible to stop. We just hit the real problems with the hammer… and barely managed to get the troops there to stop the riots before they turned into armed revolts. “Honestly, it’s probably because I have an Archdemon of War and Destruction under contract.”

The Kuzonoha matriarch barely blinked at that particular revelation, because like most she probably knew what A’Bel was from the start, unlike me.

“Greater protections have failed against lesser foes.” Kurama’s mother spoke with a grimace, before taking a seat, and partaking in the refreshments offered by my room. If I was looking after people, it’d just be fingerling sandwiches without crust and tea. For Kindred, it was a platter of hamburgers that would make any American hyperventilate and an offering of rich soup. A few hamburgers and cups of stew was good refreshment for these calorie-hungry monsters. “I wouldn’t have you die on me, especially when you’ve proven to be so capable at making my land and yours so prosperous.”

“Tell that to the rest of the continent, if everyone just listened to Roseanne, we’d all be fat, rich, and ready to roll over the Empire.” I grumbled and shook my head at the thought. The Kindred’s natural instincts were a double-edged sword. The nobility were as willing to die for what they had as the peasantry were willing to die for what they have, unless someone was present to scare the shit out of them with overwhelming force. “Anyway, I’d like a small break before the rest of my afternoon is spent with Vampires and Dhamphirs trying to get in my pants. What are you here for?”

The Kuzonoha Matriarch paused in her snack for a moment, before snorting and shaking her head.

“You’ve changed since we last met, but not nearly enough for me to even remotely like you.”

“That’d be gross, so thanks.”

“Tch. Well, then, besides checking on your success, I’ve come here to inform you that the Kuzonoha’s neighbors are now Kurama in but name.” I blinked at that, because it was impressive. It took a lot to convince Kindred to work together, let alone work beneath someone else, but my mother-in-law managed to do that without being the Demon Lord. Scary. “The new advancements, the increased funds, and the new training methods all culminated in my clan dominating my neighbors. That means I have the space to mount a trade expedition for my ancestral lands. It will take months, even with access to one of the flying barges we’ve commissioned.”

“Ah, so Kurama needs to look the place while you’re gone.” I put two and two together. “That’s fine.”

“Hmph, you say that full well knowing that she will complain to me incessantly about her new position, despite being but a day away.” Oh, I wouldn’t know about that mother-in-law. I’ve been spending enough time with Kurama to know that she’s into a lot of things that are frankly quite disturbing. The threat to my power and influence that I met long ago is long gone, and I’m afraid to figure out what makes the real Kurama tick. “But, yes, that is the case. It will take her from Ylstu, but she will be training her sisters while she is away, and she will return soon… but preferably after the assault the Empire is going to launch on Ylstu.”

I nodded at that.

“Sounds good.”

The Kuzonoha matriarch glared at me for saying so little, but there really wasn’t much else to be said.

I had assassins after me commissioned by domestic opponents.

I had the Empire ready to set a crusade on Ylstu.

It was better for me to keep people away than keep them close.

These were all obvious problems that I had to solve, so I had little to say about them besides that.

But, my mother-in-law didn’t seem to be happy about that, so I preserved and used a few more words.

“Roseanne has my back, as do a few Pharaohs, and the people beneath the waves.” I listed off the people that’d be pissed if I died and who’d come along to protect me from direct threats. Bekat’s reports back to the Pharaohs resulted in trade offers sent my way for things I knew they didn’t need, in exchange for all sorts of goodies that’ll fuck over the Empire. Trade with the deeps was going well and my coffers were filling up to the point I only took on debt because I needed political influence more than money. Then, there was the fact Roseanne would kill herself if I died before telling her everything in knew. I had a lot of support. “Quite frankly, I don’t need to try to win. Just holding on and killing people that come after me or Ylstu will get me everything that I want.”

Time was on my side.

The Kindred were building up, my connections and wealth were strengthening, and if nothing was done about me… I’ll get away with everything that I wanted.

It was honestly a great feeling and I couldn’t help but smile at the thought.

Being the big, bad lose condition is the absolute best.

That’s when my mother-in-law spoke and drove a metaphorical dagger into my heart.

“What a disgusting smile. I preferred you depressed, Hikigaya Hachiman.”

Seriously?

I couldn’t have a single smile without being called out on it!?