Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero 92

Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero 92

…

Commissioned by Arksoul

Wordcount: 2500

…

International politics were something beyond me. It was probably since I didn’t manage to get to college. The humanities course I intended to take had plenty of required classes on global affairs. Most of it would’ve been filled with propaganda, but a little paranoia and a willingness prove people wrong went a long way.

Anyway, since I was abducted as a high school junior, my studies on foreign culture and interacting with them were extremely limited.

Americans liked freedom.

The French fancy, expensive food.

Brazilians liked samba.

That sort of mediocre stuff.

My current methods of foreign policy were limited to: threaten them with overwhelming force, or assist the with overwhelming force. Both of those very, very good options were currently unavailable to me.

Since I lacked anything theoretical to fall back upon, I decided that the best course of action was to evaluate the situation simply and effectively with my own eyes.

I was able to walk, talk, and experience the Pharaoh’s country myself, since I had a capable bodyguard and a Demon that could conceal herself when ordered and fly me around.

With A’Bel and Reiser around, I was more than capable of surveying the outlying villages of the Pharaohs and take stock of their country.

Henri had told me a long time ago to not look at the castles and cities of kings, but the villages at the edges of their territory. The former-Heiress informed me that the most basic village reflected the kingdom’s true state. All the problems and gifts that a that a kingdom had manifested themselves in those villages. There was no better way to survey a land than to infiltrate one of its villages and gather extensive information upon it, especially when those in charge of it couldn’t arrange for it to be something else ahead of time.

Bekat was a strangely nice Anubis with a decent head between her shoulders, but I wasn’t going to take her city of magic and attribute it to every city and village that the Pharaohs had. The Pharaohs could easily be either hiding their full strength or how weak they truly were. Bekat’s port city was a point of first contact, a place meant to impress and amaze foreigners, therefore it was meant to look industrious, magical, and inspiring.

So, I followed my teacher’s advice and went to look for the truth with my own eyes at the nearest village.

In all honesty… I was prepared for a lot of things.

The Pharaohs having a sham of a country that really just employed mindless Undead Kindred to do massive amounts of labor for free.

The Pharaohs actually being far more powerful that they had to downgrade their shit, so that no one was too scared to approach them.

The Apophis being the good guys for some reason… complete with a tragic backstory and how they weren’t really rapacious enslavers.

But, in the end, I was surprised to find what I did… and what I kept finding.

Village after village after village… of gilded limestone tombs connected by roads, untamed fertile lands, and surrounded by arcane obelisks.

Everyone in the fucking country was asleep.

…

“This is the third village where absolutely no one is around.” I considered petulantly kicking a rock, but decided against it. It was a rock from the Pharaoh’s lands, so I could only suppose that it was taking a nap on the unused, but well-built road that went through the village. “How the hell does this country get anything done?”

A’Bel was still strutting around in her bikini, but since she was out of sight and hidden, she wasn’t affecting my sanity. Thankfully, we could still “talk” to one another without trouble from her hiding spot, since I wasn’t across an entire continent.

I didn’t know how she made thoughts sound sultry, but I didn’t want an explanation.

“The Pharaohs invested themselves in many forms of magic, but they also sought out talented inventors and tinkerers. Their mines and industries are worked by mindless things bereft souls and will… Golems resembling beasts of burden suited for singular tasks.” A’Bel’s thoughtful hum echoed in my brain. I wanted to send a glare her way, but I didn’t want her position to be found. Reiser was a decent fighter, but she couldn’t get us both out and back to the guest palace quickly. “Their people’s craftsmen worked for decades and decades to create them, but thereafter the labors and needs of the nation were forever sated. After that the Pharaohs worked to save souls of their people.”

And, after they did that, everyone had nothing better to do that sleep and dream fantastic dreams, since they had shelter, wealth, and their afterlives handled.

“Correct, my dear summoner.” A’Bel’s nod made me feel phantom impressions on the back of my head. Big, large phantom impressions. I had to bite my lip as I felt feelings of victory and superiority arise from my contracted Demon. “Do you now understand why I wish to fight the Pharaohs? Not only did they defeat my people, but they remained victorious in their victory. They were never usurped or beaten… they created and maintained a peace of thousands of years unknown to the rest of the world!”

I had a lot to say about a utopia of endless slumber… if that endless slumber was enforced and involuntary.

A bell resounded across the town of tombs just like it did in Bakat’s city… and suddenly the obelisks began to glow. Winds blew that cleared hidden platforms from beneath the sands. Then, with a burst of magic, feasts came into existence on the stone platforms in numerous, woven baskets.

The baskets were laden with fruit, bread, waterskins, and jars of beer. Large hunks of roasted meat and fish lay at the center of each platform on beds of vegetables. There were even a variety of desserts available. Breads studded with dried fruit, small, round cakes glistening with honey, and fried pieces of dough covered in honey, dates, and ground nuts were present in every square platform before each tomb.

Y’know the stuff that only the nobility usually ate in Roseanne’s territory, or those in well off cities.

All the people of the Pharaohs ate the same as their rulers.

With a gesture, I had Reiser take me to the top of the nearest tomb and hide in the shadow of the obelisks.

A’Bel spoke to me as the inhabitants of the town came forth from where they spent their eternal rest.

Their clothes were simpler than those in Bakat’s city. Linen instead of silk and carved, wooden bracelets and charms instead of golden bands. From the groups of each tomb there were one or two people who wore gold and silk, but they approached the same places where their fellow did in order to eat.

What surprised me the most was the mix of Kindred in the village.

Anubis, Sphinxes, Mummies, Desert Harpies, and other Kindred lived together. A few tombs larger groups of each species, but most were mixed, and they all spoke, dined, and ate the same food around the same tables. Those who had better clothes weren’t limited to the more powerful Kindred. In fact, there were more Mummies clad in gold and better clothes around each table than there were stronger monsters.

They ate together, laughed, and shared their dreams with one another while they slept. Some of them had rivalries with one another, talking about how intended to beat them in their next game, or get a promotion before them. A few boasted about their plans to make their temples more beautiful and challenges their neighbors to do the same. That went around and garnered the attention of a few officials and eventually and impromptu town meeting was announced for the following day… and a lot of people complained about having to wake up an hour earlier than usual to which the officials told them to just come.

This is the part where I say that men don’t matter in the Pharaohs’ society… but in all honesty, they were just there and doing the same things as the rest of the Desert Kindred. They spoke with Kindred, lived amongst them, and eyed them up. The Kindred were eyeing them up more than they were doing it, but there was actual desire behind both the men and the Kindred’s eyes.

Some men latched onto one, some latched onto a few, and some luxuriated with entire groups.

Everything that I saw told me that everyone was living the way they wanted to.

They were all living their absolute best lives under the rules of the Pharaohs and their strange culture.

The same scene played out at every village at every meal time.

“Utopia, huh.” I was vaguely familiar with the concept. Nothing to want for. Nothing to fear. Heaven on Earth. Shelter, food, and you can be whoever or whatever you want to be while you dream. “It’s neat, but it’s too fragile for my liking.”

Reiser nodded at my words and spoke when I turned her way.

“This place is in grave danger, if it is ever found by the Empire. Even if the Pharaohs are comparable to A’Bel and even if they have a standing army in waiting beneath the sands… the number of bodies and power the Kingdom can acquire from this place is worth the risk.” Reiser looked at the Kindred of the Desert. She had a hard time believing what she saw in the Pharaoh’s lands since we arrived, but now it seemed like she got over her culture shock somewhat. “These villages are utterly incapable of defense. Their only means of protection are the obelisks and they are suited only for defense against powerful magics.”

I could see what Reiser was describing.

The Empire was excellent at rapidly deploying powerful troops onto the battlefield at critical times. With their new, disposable troops taking up the attention of the Pharaohs and their professional armies, the Empire’s elites could start raiding the coastline. The Pharaohs would handle the issue within a few years, probably securing their entire coast with powerful, magical defenses, but the damage would already be done by then. The Empire would have tens of thousands of well-raised, magically-rich Kindred at their mercy… and I was sure those fucking psychopaths didn’t even know the meaning of the word.

However, that still wasn’t my problem.

At best, if the Kingdom could theoretically start raiding the Pharaoh’s lands, they’d have to build a navy, docks to support it, and start sending out manpower to the Pharaoh’s lands.  I was all for the Empire opening a second front while Roseanne ramped up the development of the Kindred and started a continent-sized assault. Valuable Empire soldiery dying over here, or in the ocean, was something that would help out the lot I’d thrown myself with.

So… as the sun began to set in the distance and the third village we’d visited began to unwind and return to their homes… I still couldn’t exactly find a reason to do anything more than the bare minimum expected of me.

There wasn’t anything here I was willing to stick my neck out for.

Roseanne could deal with the trade routes and the information exchange, after I put her in a better position on the negotiating table. The Demon Lord sent me here to show off, to present myself, and to convey that we had valuable things worth engaging in trade for. Helping the Pharaohs with their Apophis problem wasn’t necessary, unless I could get something out of it in return.

And, so far, I wasn’t seeing here that could personally benefit me.

It was a peaceful place.

Even if the Apophis faction won, I doubted the lives of the regular citizenry would change.

Even if the Empire attacked them, they’d just be signing their own death warrant as they bled soldiers and material they couldn’t lose.

Eventually, the excursions into the south will stop and the Empire would fall.

Thousands of years will pass with these people living the same, happy lives as they always did, with the past ages being a faded memory.

These people were of no use to me or my goals.

…

Kurama brought me up to speed after my day visiting the outlying villages, while she read Reiser’s report on what we found.

Bekat’s treasure fleet interested me a lot.

The treasure was barely worth my attention, besides being free money that could speed up a few projects, but the ships and the obelisk were interesting. I’d like a powerful shield that could help my crops and herds grow better outside of battle, while protecting my entire city during the battle. I could have my witches focus on something else besides defensive spells, if I had an Obelisk at my disposal.

The flying ships, naturally, were flying ships.

I wanted to rip through them, find out what they made them tick, and mass-produce them to augment my transport business and beef up my magical pirate ship. If I could have real planes going around carrying cargo, then my efforts to jumpstart the Kindred’s industrial revolution would speed up immensely as products, money, and innovation could take off.

A bigger market met more products.

More products meant more competition and innovation.

With innovation being more valuable, education was going to increase in demand, and literacy rates will rise.

It was a whole process, but Roseanne’s Kindred will immensely improve in almost every respect, while I made boatloads of money owning most of the transportation business that made it happen. The Harpies can service the cities, the Wyverns could service inter-city routes, and the magical transports could set up continental delivery services.

Maybe, if the treasure fleet was set to return to the Pharaohs, one would get into an accident and disappear on the way back?

My ruminating on having magical plans ended when Kurama cleared her throat.

“Hm?”

Kurama’s eyes twinkled mischievously as she sent a smile my way.

“My dear husband, it seems your efforts today went in vain.” Kurama slinked closer to me and held out her hand. A Kunoichi dressed only in fluttering silk handkerchiefs handed her a scroll and sent a licentious wink my way. The Kitsune unfurled the purple scroll while I glared at the shadows the Kunoichi disappeared to.  “But it does seem that you merely searched the Pharaohs lands, instead of those of the Apophis, so why not take this invitation they have sent our way to take stock of them… and see if there is anything of theirs worth taking?”

Huh.

Kurama was suggesting that I scout the Apophis by accepting their invitation with the purpose of scouting them and finding stuff of theirs I could take after helping the Pharaohs.

That… that was a great idea.

“He is amazed by your idea Kurama.”

“I can tell, A’Bel, but thank you.”

Oi, I’m out of practice when it comes to complimenting people for brilliant ideas, so give me a break!

I was going to totally compliment Kurama, dammit!

I might be an asshole, but I know to appreciate good work!