Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero 88

Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero 88

…

Commissioned by Shaderic

Wordcount: 2800

…

Out of the interest of staying sane over a month-long journey to another continent on a sailboat, I prepared a few things to review ahead of time, and hired some of the best Wyverns in my transport crews as messengers. I had to ask for permission from a few of my contemporaries to have my people in their territory, but with a few compasses that pointed straight at our ship, I was able to get some work done during the first half of the journey.

Most of it was signing off on expansions.

The Dwarves officially filled up their stronghold and needed more room. For that they needed money and more bodies, with the steady trickle of interested Dwarves not enough to properly expand their hold. Sending out messengers, arranging for an influx of immigrants, and handling their paperwork was a headache, but Ylstu’s reputation as a place where only the best Dwarves worked took care of the rest. Young, talented people poured in from various Dwarven holds, apparently many hailing from centuries-old breweries and smithing schools, and they got to work carving out the mountain for the sake of their own work.

I had no issue with increasing the amount of alcohol, weapons, and armor I was selling to the rest of the continent, so I signed off on the requirements after a day of going over them with Tanis and Kurama.

The new residential districts were a bigger headache, since those coming into Ylstu were an eclectic bunch. In Kindred lands, unskilled labor came in many different forms. It ranged from small Goblins, large Centaurs, slightly-larger-than-average Orcs, and lithe Harpies and more. I had the foresight to make apartments that could be modified with the residents in mind, but the bureaucracy was overwhelmed by the influx of new Dwarves. The census that I gained was effectively a month out of date, but I couldn’t exactly keep stalling on how many apartments for which types of Kindred I would commission.

Slums were miserable cesspits where potential was left to flounder and die.

I needed the bodies inside them learning how to read and write, taking up vocations, and getting taxed off both their income and purchases.

So, after guaranteeing that we’d barely be in the black after doing so, I signed off on the most possible apartments of each type to be built.

Two more residential districts with their accompanying amenities were going to set me back a lot of money… but in the end the more people I had working for me, making Ylstu’s products, and contributing to my society the better. It also gave the added benefit of dealing with the slums, getting people in schools, and at work sooner, so that was a particularly massive plus in my book. I didn’t expect everyone to be geniuses or talented, but with all the bodies I was processing, I was sure that I was going to find a few hidden gems here and there that’ll start a business, make a product, or do something else that’ll make me more wealthy.

So, I let that message fly, ignored my budget looking too lean for my liking, and focused on simpler, easier things.

Like managing my efforts to handle criminal organizations in the Kindred through my completely-controlled criminal underground/front.

It was really the little things, like having a productive hobby, that kept me sane nowadays.

…

A’Bel’s efforts to empower the ship had some pretty nice results. Not only was the ship traveling faster than expected, according to the navigator, but any stint of bad weather was solved. Strong winds were battered away by A’Bel’s power, while waves were calmed before they crashed into the ship. The ballistae and the crew dealt with any feral, undersea Kindred trying their luck at nabbing a male, so overall I didn’t regret sending my newly-acquired cellphone away for an update.

In fact, I was sure that we wouldn’t have happened across an unmarked island on our voyage if I hadn’t sent her away.

Now, I know what you’re thinking.

Since I had a ship, and I was on a voyage under my control, I should claim an island for myself.

It was a totally normal idea that would cross anyone’s mind, especially since I was using the most efficient sea lane to get to another country. Owning an island in the way wouldn’t just let me extend my communication line from one shore to another, it’d also let me make a pit stop for boats that didn’t have a Demon protecting it. The island was large enough to host a forest and there were even a few birds flying in the canopy, so it could also serve as a resupply point for water and food.

Overall, I was very, very tempted to disembark and claim the land as my own… but I thought better of it.

“Get the fliers ready to scout it. High altitude with telescopes and armored up.” I gave my orders and Kurama was quick to bark them out. Much of the crew was on the deck waiting for orders, including a few of Wyverns and Harpies. I didn’t want to risk them, since they were my best bet for getting an emergency message back to Roseanne if something went wrong, but they were also useful for scouting. I’d thought about bringing Henri along, or one of her best students, but the Lich was better off finishing the education of the first batch rather than assisting me now. “No risks. This could be a trap.”

Reiser nodded at my words and stood beside me. Her gaze was locked onto the island, but she gazed towards the waters and the ship’s railings every now and again.

“A wise decision, my dear summoner.” A’Bel purred from behind me. The midday sun ceased to shine upon me a moment later. I took note of the fact that she was wearing her nearly-worthless bikini still. Was it a good thing that my battle-hungry Demon was in a leisure outfit and not in her “armor?” The answer was that it probably didn’t matter. A’Bel could fight without a shred of clothing and probably come out unscathed. “Islands such as these are rarely safe, given all those who live beneath the waves. This wonderful gift can easily be a trap meant for wayward ships looking for refuge.”

“Wood, water, and food. All the things needed by a beleaguered ship. It is the perfect trap.” Tanis agreed. After a few days of getting used to her clothes fashioned for the Pharoah’s land, she’d decided to go back to her usual dress, sans a dress jacket. The silver-haired lamia pushed up her spectacles and considered the island with an amethyst gaze. “Perhaps, Lord Hikigaya, it would be best to simply move on instead of attempting to scout it? Magic against flight from the isle might come into play as our troops fly above it.”

“No. Not from the height demanded by Hachiman.” Kurama shook her head at Tanis’s words and idly pushed herself against me. The scarlet-haired and tailed Kitsune was still in the flowy, fetishized kimono that she always wore. “I’d feel such magics from here. It would be impossible to miss… but just in case…” She looked up, past the mountains providing me shade, and smiled at A’Bel. “A’Bel, do you sense any malign magics from the island?”

A’Bel’s silence at Kurama’s question was damning.

Get it?

Because she’s a Demon?

“A’Bel answer the question.”

Even though I couldn’t see her pout, the ebony-haired Demon’s pout was something that I could “see” from her tone alone.

“Yes. There are a few traps. None that our Harpies and Wyverns will trip, but certainly many that will be triggered by those who use the island’s harbor.” A’Bel gave a long, sad sigh. She leaned forward and I felt myself being absorbed by two plush, pert, and barely-constrained mountains. I tried to escape, nearly failed, and only survived thanks to Ur and Reiser working in perfect unison to save me from marshmallow hell. “It would’ve been quite wonderful to fight against a tribe of undersea ne’er-do-wells. I’ve always wanted to conquer an island… so please reconsider, my dear summoner.”

Being an extremely magnanimous and understanding person, I did reconsider and acted upon the newly acquired information while considering A’Bel’s entreaty.

“Mark this place for our return trip. Full power to sails and everyone go back to regular hours. All prior orders are rescinded.” I levelled a glare at my Demon. Her eyes glistened with crocodile tiles as she gave half-hearted sobs. I glared at her until a cheeky grin formed on her face. “I’m not risking this mission for your amusement. Try that again and I’ll send you away, even if you’re useful.”

It would’ve been nice to see some anger on A’Bel’s face, but from the satisfied smile that formed on her features after my words… I knew that she was just making sure that I gave her stricter parameters for the upcoming meeting.

While everyone on the ship watched.

“Of course, my dear summoner, your will shall be done.”

Everything had to be a power play with her didn’t it?

…

After getting all the work I could do done, I gained a lot of free time that I didn’t know what to do with.

So, in the interest of not allowing any existential dread or depression to settle in, I decided to deal with the issue of what to do with free time.

Most of Kindred literature had two categories: smut and academia. The smut could have some comedy or romance sprinkled in, but it was mostly smut. The academia portion was dry reading and mostly focused on magic. The few pieces on regular, mundane things were wrong, but it was only fun to heckle at until one of Roseanne’s hires caught wind of it.

Since I didn’t want to be involved in re-writing literally every single field of science known to the world, I got rid of that hobby and made it clear that any revisions would count as work.

If I was going to get asked to correct every single mistake in the textbooks, I was going to at least get paid for it.

Anyway, since Kindred literature wasn’t at all that interesting, I had to come up with other things to pass the time.

Preferably things that I could make money off, but preferably things that would make me focus and pass the time sufficiently distracted from my responsibilities and failings.

It was a lot more difficult than I expected.

Chess, Checkers, and even Shogi were all easy enough to replicate and they were a hit amongst the Kindred. Checkers tended to find its way into the bars, while Shogi found its way to the nobles. Chess, however, was picked up by the academics and they shared it with their friends, so it spread with relative quickness in all the social strata. It was all fun and games, until I introduced the concept of clubs, registered rankings, and statistics.

I washed my hands of my creations when I didn’t find them fun and when the chess nerds starting having actual events and rivalries.

That left me with board games that I could shamelessly steal and sell off as my own.

That didn’t fare well either.

Monopoly failed since capitalism hadn’t taken root yet. Most of its systems didn’t make sense in the medieval setting. Life insurance wasn’t a thing, the lottery wasn’t a thing, property management and long-term increases wasn’t understood by the masses. It needed a lot of refinement, which meant a lot of work on my end, for it to become a product… and even then, I was sure it was going to fail so I didn’t bother.

Life was more interesting and my play-testers (maids) enjoyed playing it, but Kurama told me that it wouldn’t make much sense out of Ylstu. The concept of upward mobility in life was relatively new, most of the peasantry were barely acclimating to Roseanne’s reforms, and some nobles were passively against it. Though I considered having it made anyway, since I could use at as propaganda to convince the masses that they should be able to choose how to spend their lives, I decided against it.

Mostly because it got boring after a few games, even with a few crazier event cards added in.

Thus, most of my attempts to make a way to pass the time failed repeatedly, until I settled on something simpler.

Learning how to defend myself.

Was it fun?

No.

Did it make me money?

No.

Was it productive?

Yes.

Did it distract me from my problems?

Yes.

It wasn’t the perfect solution to my issue, but it was how I spent the remaining weeks during our travel.

Ur was a harsh taskmaster and didn’t take any excuses, though.

“Get up, Hachiman.” I heard the phrase a dozen times during every mock battle that we had. After I went through the motions and practiced my footwork and attacks, my Amazon bodyguard pit me against herself on the deck of the ship. Since she and the other Amazons were well-known, renowned champions, I had nothing to fear from getting knocked down by her… though that didn’t mean I liked getting knocked down at all. “You tried to parry when you should’ve dodged, again.”

Ur was using a wooden club, while I used a wooden sword.

Or, rather, since I was using to get up more than I was swinging it… it was more appropriate to call the sword a wooden cane.

I groaned as I got up, ignored the looks sent my way for being a sweaty, young man wearing only trousers, and did my best to focus.

Ur gave me a nod when I managed to regain a fighting stance, despite the tiredness settling into my bones.

“Watch me more carefully. Look to my shoulders. If they rise or move, it means I am putting my back into my assault. That means you must move out of the way.” Ur repeated her instructions, even though I heard it before. She was doing her best to ingrain the words right into my brain. “You may attempt to parry jabs or swift strikes, as you can overcome those with skill and speed, but never attacks of immense strength.”

There was no declaration on Ur’s part.

She charged right after she finished her sentence and I found myself on the backfoot immediately.

My Amazon bodyguard wasn’t using any magic, wasn’t using any specialized weapons, and not wearing any armor that amplified her abilities.

Yet, I barely managed to “fight” against her, even while she held back.

“Good! Well done!” Ur congratulated me with each successful movement, especially when I remembered to not let myself get trapped between her and the ship. For a regular human being, fighting against the likes of Kindred was a matter of survival until someone else better armed came along. “Now… what about this!”

Ur suddenly upped her speed and I lost my train of thought.

My world became nothing more than a series of reactions and movements to the onslaught of attacks coming my way. Attacks that I had to avoid and parry started to meld together, until Ur began to switch which hand wielded the club she was using. The additional angles of attack proved to be my downfall. By the third time she switched between her right and left hand, I was barely able to hold onto my sword, and with a final swing she knocked my weapon out of my hands and lightly tapped my head with her club.

I fell on my ass a moment later, out of breath, and with arms and legs screaming in pain.

I waited for Ur to tell me what I did wrong, but I was surprised to find her offering her hand to me and smiling.

“That’s your limits for now, Hachiman. That is the most that you can do in battle… and I’m happy to say that it’s more than enough with all those you’ve gathered beside you.” Ur’s words were music to my ears and I let myself fall completely on the deck. I didn’t even care about the fact I was half-dressed and sweating in the middle of a ship full of Kindred. I was too tired to care. “Well done.”

I did it.

After two weeks of constant training… I managed to reach a stage where I wouldn’t die immediately after entering a fight.

And, I suppose, there was the fact that I was now willing to work on protecting myself instead of just giving up if I didn’t have anyone around to help.

That was a form of progress too, I suppose.