Her Idol PART 3 (His Idol Season 2)

Sorry for the delay on the next part for this

To catch anyone up - Paulene is all grown up and a councilor at Jacky's and Sonya's School. After her first encounter with Jacky, she's left frustrated she wasn't able to help.

Her Idol Part 3
I haven’t been able to shake the unease. Ever since seeing Jacky this afternoon, it’s as if something inside me has come unmoored. I’m furious with myself for taking it so personally. After all, I am trained not to. But with Jacky, it’s personal.

Maybe because, when I look at her, I almost see myself.

Pulling into our driveway, I sit in my car for a moment, gathering my thoughts. I left out a few stress relieving breaths, grounding myself before remembering the Egg Prime Directive.

Egg Prime Directive = not pushing an egg into tracking.

Once calmer, I step out of the car and rush to our porch. The wind is blustery, and I’d rather our elderly neighbour didn’t try and sneak a peek at my underwear. Honestly, it won’t be the first time. It’s a good thing he doesn’t know I’m trans. That would likely give him a heart attack.

As I walk inside, I hang up my bag, and Oscar peeks around the corner. He’s in the kitchen, being just such a gentleman. I can already smell the sweet aroma of food wafting around our house.

I really don’t deserve him.

“Hey, babe!” he calls out, ushering me into the kitchen.

As I join him, I’m greeted with the sight of him wearing a novelty apron with a lady's naked body. Something I asked him not to buy, but he thought it was amusing.

“Hi,” I kiss him on the cheek as he cooks. That’s when I notice he’s still wearing his office shirt. “Oscar…!” I let out a long breath, touching the color of his shirt. “If I get sauce on this shirt, it’s going to be ruined!”

He takes me by the waist and kisses the top of my head. “So,” he says, holding me tight. “I finished early today, and I felt like cooking my lovely fiancé something!”

My cheeks flush. We’ve been dating for years, but as soon as he says things like that to me, I just melt in his arms.

I push away from his embrace and compose myself.

“So, did you do any laundry?”

“Some.”

I fold my arms and lean against the counter. “Some….?”

“Yeah,” he smiles wide. “I did all your tiny little undies.”

“W-What?” I lean across to look outside to see the washing line. I hope to high heaven he hasn’t just put my underwear out there, especially with our neighbour.

“Haha,” Oscar tease, making me thump his shoulder. “Made you look!”

“Jerk.” I pout and look away. “You know, Mr Saunders next door would have a heart attack if you did that.” I glare at Oscar and stick out my tongue. “I should have known you were being silly. I only own like one pair of naughty panties.”

“I know. Shame.”

“Oi,” I thump him again.

“What…?” he laughs, reacting to me with a cheeky smile. “I like it when you walk around in your what-nots. You might be a little afraid of our mutual friend downstairs, but I’m not.”

Heat floods my cheeks, hotter this time. This is probably exactly what he intended.

“Shut up.” I thump him again, sticking out my tongue for emphasis. “Maybe our mutual friend takes a little trip with you down the back alley tonight, hmm…?”

He tilts his head to one side and gives me a wry smile. “I’m all for that, babe.” He replies with a glint of honesty in his eye. “But, are you going to be able to get it up?”

“Probably not,” I answer with absolute honestly, looking over at the food he’s cooking. “Pay attention, babe. You’re burning the food.

“Oh, crap!”

“Not housewife material just yet,” I giggle, thumping him one last time before I head out of the kitchen. I look back at him as I walk away. “Ima a go change. I’ll be right back.

Worked up and very aroused, I close the bedroom door and let out a long breath. I love that man, but my goodness, does he know how to get me going.

I quickly strip down and get naked. I glance at my naked body for all but a second. Something of an affirmation for me these days. Seeing my gentle curves reminds me of how far I’ve come and how proud of am of past me for making such a big decision.

(With help from my Mom, of course.)

I quickly pull out some leggings and a yoga top. For fun, I wear the one black lacey thong I own. If I’m going to get lucky tonight, and I think I am, I want to look nice for my husband to be.

Dressed and looking fire, if I don’t say myself, I rejoin Oscar in the kitchen. He’s set out dinner for us both. I perch myself next to him on the breakfast counter and look at the stir-fry that he’s lovingly made for me.

It might be silly, but it stirs something inside. Every time he cooks, it reminds me how lucky I am to have met someone so handsome and caring. Ever since our first date, back when I came out, he’s been nothing be spectacular with me.

Every single aspect of my transition has been like it’s his own personal mission. Yet, even in those earlier days, he didn’t push me to look feminine. He was just as happy walking down the street, holding hands with boy-mode me, as he was with trans-femme me.

“So,” Oscar talks with his mouth full. “How’d things go with you and that kid you told me about?”

“Jacky,” I reply, squirming uncomfortably at the mention of her as I eat. “Not so good.”

“Oh,” Oscar reaches for his drink and takes a swig. “Can I ask why?”

I lower my fork and stare at the wall in thought.

“I don’t know,” I reply, followed by a long breath. “I think I came on too strong.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s not like you, sweetheart.”

“I know,” I answer with a scrunched face. “I’m pretty worked up about it. Jacky is obviously confused about her gender. Her mother told me some very interesting things. Honestly, I want to get them down for assessment as soon as possible.”

“Should you….” Oscar stops eating to look at me. “Are you telling me any of this?”

I shake my head. “No, not really.”

“It’s really getting you down then, huh?”

“Yeah….” I let out a long sigh. “I just…just know that coming out fully will improve her life tenfold. I know it did for me!” I turn to look at my loving fiancé. “I mean, I met you pretty much as soon as I came out, and I’ve never been happier!”

“Lucky you,” Oscar grins, before turning serious. “But, sweetheart. That doesn’t mean the same thing will happen to them. What if Jacky isn’t ready?”

“In my professional opinion, SHE IS,” I snap back rather unintentionally blunt.

Oscar is silent for a moment. He resumes slowly eating his food, and I feel like such a jerk.

“S-Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Oscar points at my food without looking in my direction. “Eat. It’ll make you feel better.”

I ruffle my hair in frustration before picking up my fork. As I’m about to scoop up some rice, I know I need to get it off my mind, overwise I’m going to stress about it all night.

“I’m worried the mother doesn’t take her seriously as trans,” I explain.

Oscar wipes his face with his napkin and looks me straight in the eyes. “Not every mother is going to be as accepting as yours, Paulene. It’s not your place to interfere. Jacky is not your child. You’re only there to support.”

I look away from his gaze.

Bloody smarty pants. I know he’s right, but I don’t want to admit it

“But I think it’ll really improve her life if I say something!”

“Babe,” Oscar takes my hand, making me look at him once again. “Please don’t do anything silly, okay?”

“Silly!?” I huff, swiping my hand from his. “How is making a child's life infinitely better ‘silly’?”

“Well….” Oscar brings his hand to my chin and gently holds it. “I’m not saying it wouldn’t. I’m saying Jacky isn’t your child.”

Pouting, I fold my arms a look away.

“Babe……” Oscar says softly, stifling an awkward laugh. “I assume Jacky is not even eighteen yet, right?”

“So,” I reply petulantly.

Of course, I know what he’s getting at. I just don’t want to see the stupid male logic he’s throwing at me.

“So….” he says, bringing his ears to my lips to whisper. “Maybe concentrate on our little family first. We might be having the pitta patta of tiny feet in these hallways really soon, huh. You’ll be a mommy yourself!”

Once again, I blush like crazy. I just can’t help it. My body just reacts to Oscar's touch. It wants him to touch me.

Before I can even speak, he’s turned my face with the hand still on my chin and plants a passionate kiss on my lips.

“Yes, Mrs Davies-to-be.” He steals yet another kiss. “Do you agree?”

“Yes, I suppose so,” I reluctantly agree, kissing him back. “But I still think I’m right. Jacky’s mother is holding her back. It’s not right.”

Oscar smiles as he lets my chin go and sits up straight on his stool. Taking his fork to once again eat, he throws me a quick glance. “I know, babe. Just try not to worry about it. You can’t save everyone. You said that yourself.”

I nod in agreement, but deep down, I’m still unsettled. Is it right for me to just sit back and wait when it’s so obvious? It’s like I’m watching a blind person looking for food and just not telling them where to go.

Just doesn’t sit right.

Oscar changes the subject. “Did you talk with your Mom?”

“About my dad?”

“Yeah.”

“I still don’t want him to come.”

Oscar looks at me with concern, lowering his fork. “Why?”

I furrow my brow and give him a real frustrated look. “You know exactly why I don’t want him there.”

Oscar looks surprised at my reaction. The concern on his face makes me feel stupid or silly for feeling the way I do.

“I know it’s going to be heard, sweetheart, but that’s your dad.”

I turn away from him and remain silent.

“Ah, don’t be like that,” Oscar groans. “You said it yourself. Breakdowns lead to breakthroughs. If we have a child, do you want them to grow up without a grandpa?”

“Wouldn’t be his grandpa,” I whisper under my breath.

“Sorry?”

I shake my head and pick up my fork. “It’s nothing. Forget it.”

“No, come on….”

Oscar reaches over to me to take my hand, but I move away.

“Don’t,” I reply sharply. “You’re making my feelings trivial in the face of what the man did, or in his case, did not.”

“I-I…” Oscar lifts his hands, palms out, signaling he’s not looking for a fight. “I’m not trying to dismiss how you feel, Paulene. I just want to help.”

“Well, don’t,” I hiss, getting to my feet.

Tears welling behind my eyes, I storm off towards the bedroom.

“Babe…!?” Oscar cries out in confusion. “Please. I wasn’t trying to upset you.”

I stop, turn to glare back at him, and grit my teeth. “Your father was there for you when you needed him,” I hiss back at him. “Mine wasn’t. Even when I was a boy, he didn’t want to know. Then, when I’d finally come out as a woman and wanted to introduce myself, he disowned me.”

I wipe the tears running down my cheeks.

“Now, tell me,” I continue, talking through my teeth. “Does that man deserve to give me away?!”

Oscar’s shoulders slump, the worry etched clearly across his face. But he says nothing. I know him too well—silence means he thinks I’m wrong, but won’t say it for fear of upsetting me.

That only makes me angrier.

“Oh, whatever, Oscar!” I snap, throwing my hands to my sides before storming off. “Sleep on the sofa. I don’t want you in the bedroom tonight!”

“B-but….” He calls out as I slam the bedroom door.

I fall flat onto our bed, tears dribbling from my eyes.

“Fuck sake,” I groan, grabbing a pillow to hold. “He’s not fucking coming. No way.”