Update On My Health, Changes, Commissions, & This Week's Schedule

My health is Not The Best.

I'm not terminal or incapable of work, the Patreon isn't shutting down or going on hiatus. So if that's all you're worried about (no shade, I understand some of you just aren't interested in more detail) then you can stop reading here. Content Marches On!

I went to see a doctor about my ears, I was told I had received temporary eardrum damage due to a concert. But the doctor also noticed I hadn't had a physical in 2 years, and so we also just got that out of the way. This included blood work, taking my weight, and discussing my sleeping habits. On Friday, I got a call telling me that I am "Iron deficient, Vitamin D deficient, twenty pounds underweight, and not sleeping enough." I could've told him that last one, though. The Vitamin D one is especially embarrassing, because I live in one of the most fair-weather places in the United States... For the last two years, I've had more headaches, fatigue, and my nose has been more prone to bleeding than usual... and I chose to write it all off to avoid paying a doctor. Oops!

I had always internalized hard work as skipping meals, losing sleep, not going out much, etc. "The sleepless genius", I once heard it described as, as if these traits were admirable, and proof of one's dedication to craft. That's just called Being A Moron. When you eat only one balanced meal a day and supplement the rest with multiple bowls of dry cereal, do not see the sun ever, and go to bed around 5 in the morning each day... it's not very healthy! Apparently I needed a fucking medical professional to tell me this.

I want to be clear that no particular person has made me feel this way. Compared to some content creators I've seen, you guys have been very patient, understanding, respectful, and pleasant. I'm immensely grateful for that. No, this is an issue of personal perspective, and an unwillingness to acknowledge I'm getting older and cannot work like I did in college.

I took the day off yesterday, went out to a park for some food and sun, got horrendously sunburnt, and took some time to myself to think about how I can improve my productivity, keep my schedule, and still live to see my 30s.

#1: I'll only be working 5 days a week

This idea is particularly inspired. I've never heard of anyone doing it before. Jokes aside, I had a lot of trouble taking days off due to how much of this requires scheduling with VAs and artists with different hours and time zones. Since most of the VAs take weekends off, however, weekends also became the best time to edit. So I never quite found a convenient day to take off. I've decided moving forward, I will use Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday as my Friday, Saturday, and Sunday respectively. I will be unavailable on Discord, Patreon, and Twitter on Tuesday and Wednesday, then use Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday for all regular operation.

#2: Weekly Audios Will Not Be So Rigorously Scheduled

Moving forward, I will not be disclosing the audio scheduling, and only announcing which audio will be released that week once I am 100% certain I have everything I need to to complete it, and that I have enough time to finish it properly. Ideally, that means as much as 7 days of heads-up for an audio, but don't be surprised if its just 2-3 days heads up.

There's simply too many moving parts with audios, from VA availability, to how difficult an audio is to actually do (for example, if it has an improvised toilet, then it requires more unique sound effects than usual). Roadmaps were nice for keeping me organized and accountable but they also lead to expectations being dashed and they box me in to delay an audio rather than pivot to do something I can finish within the week in most cases. Plus, it will prevent all-nighters and crunch.

#3 Commissions Will Stay Open

As an extension of the above, I'll want to just have more content on deck to weather inconveniences. This means I'll be keeping commissions open indefinitely. I will be transparent about expected wait times and scheduling, as well as the high cost of voice work so that you can make an informed decision about whether you want to actually receive a comm or not. I'll make a commission sheet this week, but until then, I will make a post about it tomorrow and invite anyone who is chomping at the bit for a comm to DM me as of right now!

This Week...

To be honest? This week, I just need a little more rest. I need to try to go outside, and I need to start fixing my sleep schedule. I need to learn how to eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner again rather than JUST dinner. This is the best week for it, because the VAs and artist for the Palutena audio also need a bit of time for other obligations. That said, I intend to wrap up the Ophelia motion comic this week for free members/social media, and I have a commissioned audio for paid members. I may have another thing for paid members this coming week, but I'm not going to push myself too hard.

In all my endeavors both on this side of the internet and the more tame side, I'm known for chronic overwork and crunch. I never saw "take care of yourself" as more than a platitude. Some of you probably meant it from a place of genuine worry. It's a sick perspective in hindsight, to not trust the sincerity of the people who care about you. To all of you I've worried, I apologize.

And if it really is all you care about, and my state of being is secondary to your gratification, I am not here to shame you, as I don't take it personally. Hopefully you will not take it personally that I can no longer ignore the obvious signs in how I feel saying that this way of working and living isn't sustainable.

I now understand the true weight of the phrase "take care of yourself," so I'll be respecting just how important it really is to do so from now on.