This Drawing Model is Unsustainable

(tl;dr on bottom)

I've been here drawing for years. It's not hard to see that going through my history, I have a habit of finishing work at a very slow pace.

It's nothing really new, it's something I'm aware of and have been working at. While I have gotten somewhat faster at creating art, my interest in it slowly dwindled. I still enjoy drawing butt content and Puwas.

My productivity has been questionable at best. It's not very easy to work when you have ADHD. I've been seeking help for it for a few years, but it's been hard financially to get it, as it usually goes over a couple thousand to get proper help, and financially, I've been in the red for as long as I can remember. I'm not very good at taking care of myself, getting myself organized. Most efforts to organize last at least a week at best before it crumbles and I find myself in my old patterns.

I'm not going to entirely blame ADHD on my issues. I believe my issue was getting into art in the first place, and trying to make it something that can support me.

Deep down, I always repressed the idea that I couldn't make it in art. But I do like art, and drawing, learning new things to apply to my drawings, coloring, etc.

My issue was believing that it was for me, when I really knew it wasn't. I like art, but I love story telling and making jokes. I fell into the trap of trying to make art my living, when I always knew I would struggle doing it. But I always kept pushing on with it, despite how much it troubled me to do it.  I hoped that not giving up on it would eventually help me push through my own barriers.

But I can't get organized like most people, keep things in line like most people.

Art was a hobby, and it should have stayed that way. It wasn't the art I liked the most, it was the story telling and ideas. Art was always second. But I kept trying to push it as if it was something I could do always.

The truth is, I don't like art as much. I just wanted to like it as much as my peers. Art was a way to express my ideas, but instead of expressing my ideas, I fell into the trap of making art the priority instead of stories and ideas.

My Changes

I've had tiers to help explain my methods to people, but I've been way too slow on making tutorials of any kind, and no one really approached me for any one on one tips on Patreon or Discord.
From today, I'm removing all tiers above 2 dollars. I just don't see any reason to keep them, or even ask anyone to pledge anything above 2 dollars.

I don't care about the money as much as I thought I would.

I may be a struggling artist, but money hasn't really been a good motivation what-so-ever. It's HELPFUL, but it doesn't really get me moving to do more. It sort of does the complete opposite. It makes me over think stuff, makes me feel guilty when I have those weeks of art rot. It makes me think of all the people I've let down.

I'm no longer going to worry about making refined comics to tell my ideas. I will sketch them out, have fun with them, explain what I can in quick sketches. If I wanna make legit fap material, I will make them colored and refined. But with alot story ideas, I just don't see the point in taking weeks to color up a page just to tell a point.

I will also stop taking big commissions and stick to stream sketches. I noticed that every time I take large commissions, it stops everything. I've also been getting people who ask for too much in one sitting, and it's also been slowing me down considerably. I just don't have the patience for it anymore. I've been too slow on them, and there's not much that will speed me up. I take HOURS on single colored commissions, and my process is just too slow. 

I will only start taking very very few of them, and just stick with sketches for the majority of commissions.

TL;DR

• Things aren't working. I need to change the way I approach content creation. Starting with focusing on quicker drawings for lore and story ideas.
• Less tiers, I see no reason keeping other tiers, request that everyone only support what they feel like supporting.
• I do this for fun, not for monetary gain. My mistake was doing this for monetary gain.
• More Puwas