Harry Potter and the Monster Books Part 10

Dudley hit the mat feeling like he'd just gotten hit by a brick or a baseball bat rather than a person.

"Get up," Mikey taunted as he tossed a couple of shadow punches at Dudley, breaking several of his ribs with his magic. "I'm going to break you and then I'm going to fuck you."

"Hey!" the ref shouted at the smug teen that was breaking the rules. "Knock that shit off. You can't hit people when they're down."

"Sorry," the smug young man replied with a smirk, not in the least bit sorry since Dudley had been screwing with him and they had healers that could fix it once the tournament was done.

Dudley couched up blood as he used the ropes around the ring to pull himself to his feet, knowing that giving up wouldn't help as he couldn't go home until he won the tournament.

"Hey Mikey, two hundred if you throw the match," one of the fighters called out as he pulled two hundred dollar bills out of his wallet.

"Don't start that shit!" Frankie complained, well aware how Mikey typically tossed matches, generally by fouling out. "He's not throwing the match."

"Not a chance," Mikey replied with amusement, wondering if he'd up the offer.

"Three hundred?" the fighter called out as he pulled another hundred out of his wallet and held the money up to show Mikey that he was serious.

"Fuck that!" the bookie called out. "Just beat the shit out of him!"

"Shite," Dudley complained when he realized that Mikey was going to take the money.

"Don't!" the ref complained, knowing it wouldn't make a difference.

"Nothing personal," Mikey told Dudley then kicked the air, causing Dudley to crumple to the ground when his magic struck Dudley right in the nuts with the force of his kick.

"Yes!" a busty blonde teenager with cat ears and a long fluffy tail called out from where she was standing with a bunch of topless girls.

"Out of the ring!" the ref shouted.

"Worth it," Mikey replied with a grin as he jumped out of the ring. He walked over and collected the money from the guy that had bribed him to throw the match. 'Paid twice for the same job.'

"That was fucking cold," Frankie complained, glaring at Mikey.

"If he didn't want to get hit in the nuts, he shouldn't have stolen the last piece of pizza from Tiny," Mikey replied with a grin.

"You're all insane," Frankie complained.

"Nah, we're just monsters," Mikey replied with a grin, showing off his fangs. "Besides, Tiny said she'd fuck me on the roof of the church if I tossed the match and the grand prize is only five hundred."

Frankie glanced over at the attractive catgirl that didn't have any business being called Tiny since she was a couple of inches short of seven feet and busty. "Fair enough."

"Fuck that shit!" the bookie complained as he stalked over to confront Mikey. "I'm not paying.…" he trailed off as the leader of the gym stood up, reminding him that Al would step in if he didn't pay out since the idiot had actually won the match. "Fucking bastard."

"Nah, my parents were married," Mikey replied with a grin as the bookie pulled a wad of cash out of his pocket.

A blond teenager wearing a pair of gym shorts jumped into the ring holding a baseball bat. "Hey Ref, how long do I have to wait before I can start beating him to death with my bat?"

The ref glanced at the guy that looked like a surfer wannabee then over at the teen crumpled on the mat clutching his nuts. "I'll give him two minutes, if he hasn't gotten up I'll just call the tournament over."

"Get up pig!" Ralph taunted. "I'm going to break your arms and legs and leave you in a dumpster, you don't belong in the ring, you've got no talent, like everyone else in the fucking gym."

"Toss the bat, unless you want him to be able to use weapons," the ref told the idiot that was probably going to end up in a bodybag by the end of the night if he kept running his mouth.

"He's fucked up, he's going to need them," Ralph replied with amusement.

"Your funeral," the ref replied as he looked at his watch, marking the time.

Dudley blinked a couple of times when the pain and exhaustion vanished between one breath and the next, leaving him feeling fantastic and clear headed. 'What the fuck?' he thought as he pushed himself to his knees. "Hey Bookie, one thousand on me," he said, slurring his words and not looking directly at the man.

"Deal," the bookie replied with a smirk, seeing the bet as a good way to make up for having to pay Mikey.

"Five hundred on Dudley!" Mikey called out, having noticed that Dudley wasn't as screwed up as he was pretending.

"Deal, sucker," the bookie said he started collecting bets, surprised by the number of students that were betting on the nearly dead guy. 'Gym loyalty, gotta love sentimental idiots.'

"Maybe you should just sit this one out," Frankie told Dudley, worried about her friend since Ralph was enough of a bastard to cripple or kill him, especially if he was using his enchanted bat.

"I'm going to fuck your boyfriend up," Ralph told Frankie with a smirk. "Unless you agree to let me spank your ass in public."

"Go fuck yourself," Frankie told him, knowing that he'd just beat the shit out of Dudley no matter what she promised. "Just because I like showing off the goods, doesn't mean you can touch them."

'Fuck that,' Dudley thought as he used his lightning glove spell while Ralph was distracted, replacing his boxing gloves with black work gloves. "Leave her alone," he told Ralph as he pushed himself to his feet, making sure to sway a bit to make him think he was more screwed up than he was.

Ralph laughed when he turned and saw Dudley looking like a leaf could knock him over. "I'm going to enjoy this."

The ref glanced between the two fighters. "Do you agree to fight with weapons?"

"Yeah, that's fine," Dudley assured him as he pulled his pocket knife out of his pocket, slurring his words so that the asshole wouldn't change his mind.

"Let's go," Ralph said with a smirk as he spent the mana to charge his bat so that it would hit harder, rather amused that Dudley thought his pocket knife would do anything with the reach the bat gave him.

The ref moved out of the way. "Go!"

Dudley smirked as he dropped the pocket knife, raised his hands and unleashed a blast of lightning at the asshole that liked causing trouble every time they had a regional match.

Ralph screamed in agony as the lightning made his muscles lock up.

Dudley lunged forward and slammed his right fist into the bastard's face, knowing he didn't have enough mana to hold the lightning on him until he was dead.

Frankie smiled as she watched Dudley work Ralph over like a professional. "Go Dudley!"

"What the fuck is this shit?!" the bookie demanded, feeling cheated.

"Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose," Mikey told him.

"He was barely conscious," the bookie complained as he glanced at the door, wondering if he could make it before the fighters tore him apart.

"Ralph should have kept his mouth shut about his girlfriend," Mikey replied with a smirk.

"And match!" the ref called out as Ralph was finally allowed to collapse after Dudley had broken his jaw and half of his ribs.

Dudley smiled slightly when a glowing portal appeared in front of the door to the supply closet, letting him know that he'd completed the objective and could leave, feeling a bit conflicted about leaving as he'd made some real friends over the last six months and built up a life for himself that didn't involve being a pathetic piece of shit. He reached down and picked up Ralph's enchanted baseball bat, figuring there wasn't a point in leaving it behind.

"That was awesome!" Frankie told Dudley as he climbed out of the ring.

"Thanks," Dudley replied. "I couldn't have done it without Mikey taking a fall."

"Sorry about the nuts, it's tradition," Mikey replied with a grin as he collected his money from the grumbling bookie.

"Liar," Dudley replied, making a mental note to sucker punch his friend when he wasn't expecting it, even if he probably deserved it for sticking garlic on his pizza. He smirked as he collected his money from the bookie that was trying to set him on fire with his glare. "Pleasure doing business with you."

"Fuck you kid!" the bookie snapped as he paid the rest of the assholes that had cheated him.

"Not my type," Dudley replied smugly as Frankie pulled him into a one armed hug. 'At least she's not wearing the fake bolts today, Mum would flip.'

"Damned straight," Frankie replied with a grin. "Where are we going to celebrate?"

"Through a portal," Dudley replied as he gestured at the portal, unwilling to leave his friends behind. “All of us. I told you, when it appeared I wanted you guys to go with me.”

"Ride of die," Mikey replied with a grin as he picked up the cat girl and headed for the portal, looking forward to having a night on the town.

Frankie laughed then followed her friends.

Dudley smiled as the owner of the gym walked over. "I want to thank you but I'm hitting the road."

Al glanced at the portal then focused on Dudley. "Treat the girls right or I'm going to find you and beat the shit out of you."

"Always," Dudley agreed as he turned and followed his friends, grabbing his duffle bag on the way to the portal. 'At least I have plenty of cash, even if it's American,' he mused, looking forward to a change of pace since he'd spent the last six months getting the shit beat out of him to get ready for the tournament.

The bookie glared at the owner of the gym. "If you don't cover the losses, I'm going to talk to the police."

Al stared at the bookie for a couple of seconds, wondering if he was really that stupid. "You're a fucking bookie, they're going to throw you in jail."

"I've got friends," the bookie warned him as a black haired girl came up behind him with a sock filled with nickels.

"So do I," Al replied with a smirk as the girl hit the bookie with her homemade sap, dropping him unconscious.

"Never did like the guy," Faith said as she started looting the bookie, starting with his expensive leather jacket since the guy was about her height. "Where are we going next?"

"Florida," Al replied with a grin as he pulled a sliding device out of his pocket and pushed the button, creating a portal.

"What's in Florida?" she asked as she stole the bookie's expensive coat 

"Zombies and hot girls," Al replied with a smirk then jumped through.

"Good enough," Faith muttered and followed her watcher.

0o0o0

"What are you going to do if the slimes eat the house?" Molly asked, not particularly happy with the group's current plan.

"I'll probably throw a party," Sirius replied, not particularly worried about the house.

James laughed. "You're already throwing a party."

"You're allowed to throw a party when your friends come back from the dead," Sirius argued.

"Damned straight," the older Lily added.

"And if the slimes escape?" Molly asked, hoping Dumbledore could talk some sense into him since they weren't listening to her.

Sirius gestured at Moody. "They'll vanish in two hours and Moody said that he'd stick around and keep an eye on things from outside."

"I don't mind helping," Moody assured them, looking forward to seeing how well the slimes dealt with the dark magic that had soaked into the house over the years. 

"I doubt the slimes are going to leave," Harry cut in as Ron walked into the drawing room, looking washed out and pale like he had a fever or like he'd just run a couple of miles without a break. "The house is filled with dark magic and the slimes love eating it."

"I'll be sticking around to help make sure the slimes stay contained, enjoy the party," Albus suggested.

"Fine…" Molly trailed off as she turned and saw how pale Ron was. "Are you sick?"

"I'm fine," Ron assured his mother, not feeling particularly good after burning as much magic as he could so he could escape the book. "I'm just a bit hungry," he lied as his mother checked his temperature, wondering who all of the extra people were. 'I shouldn't have grabbed the third class before jumping out and giving things a chance to settle.'

"You're a bit clammy," Molly told him.

"I'll be fine," Ron assured her, knowing that she'd probably tan his hide and try to ground him for life if she knew that he'd nearly gotten trapped in a book.

"He probably just needs to get out of the house and walk around," Sirius offered, looking forward to getting out of the house himself, now that he didn't have to worry about getting arrested or shot because someone recognized him since he had his cowgirl form.

Molly gave Ron a suspicious look then sighed. "Fine, go have fun with your friends. I have a couple of things to take care of at home."

"He'll be fine," Lily assured her.

"Let me know if he takes a turn for the worse." Molly turned her attention to Fred and George. "Behave or else."

"Yes, Mum," the twins replied at the same time.

"If they don't behave, feel free to hex them," Molly told Sirius then left to grab her travel bag so that the slimes wouldn't eat her clothes.

"Not a problem," Sirius assured her.

Fred snickered once his mother had left. "You'd think she doesn't trust us."

"With good reason," George said with a grin. "So, what's the plan?"

Sirius glanced at Ron then focused on the twins. "We're going to toss all of the clothes through the mine portals and then Harry is going to start in the attic and summon a bunch of slimes on every floor then we're going to grab some fish and chips and see a movie."

"And maybe hit a pub," the older Lily added.

"Works for me," Harry agreed as he headed for the door, looking forward to spending time with his family doing all of the stuff he'd never had the chance to.

Ron walked over and flopped down on the couch as one of the people that looked like an older Harry headed into the hall with Snape and Moody to have a conversation. "Let me know when I have to move."

"What happened?" Hermione asked Ron, surprised that he looked like crap.

"You look like shite," Ginny offered.

"I feel like shite," Ron admitted as he glanced around the room at people that were strangely familiar. "I spent a bit too much magic escaping the book."

"What happened?" Lily asked.

Ron glanced at the young woman with blue skin and pointed ears that looked in her late teens or early twenties then focused on Hermione. "How much did you tell them?"

"I just explained about the monster books," Hermione told him. "We've mostly been talking about our plan to cover the house in slime to deal with the dark magic."

"Okay, let me know when I have to move," Ron told her then leaned his head back and closed his eyes, too exhausted to concentrate at the moment.

'I'll have to get the details later,' Hermione thought as she turned to look at Lily. "Do you want an alternate form?"

"Absolutely," Lily agreed, curious what she'd end up with.

Hermione focused on Lily and cast the cowgirl spell on her. "That should do it."

"Thank you." Lily pulled her wand out of the pocket of her robe and conjured a standing mirror and a dressing screen so she could change. She walked behind the screen and activated her new ability, causing blue sparkles to wash over her and change her appearance.

"Did it work?" Sage asked.

Lily stared at the mostly naked teenage girl looking back at her in the mirror. 'Same eyes, same ears and nose, larger breasts,' she mused as she studied her reflection, fairly sure she'd need a picture to spot any actual differences from how she looked as a teenager. "So much for the spell being random."

"What do you mean?" Sage asked.

"One second," Lily replied as she twisted around so she could look at her butt in the mirror. 'Yeah, that's an improvement,' she mused as she tapped her wand on the chaps and transfigured them into a blue summer dress. She checked the dress in the mirror to make sure she hadn't screwed anything up then walked out from behind the mirror. "I look like I did when I was sixteen or seventeen."

"Smoking hot?" Sirius asked with amusement.

"Damned straight," Lily replied with a grin.

"Liar," the older Lily teased.

Lily stuck her tongue out at her doppelganger, looking forward to having a chance to get to know her a bit better, over a glass of wine or five since she was probably going to be sharing James with her.

"You're not exactly what I was expecting," Rose admitted.

Lily turned to look at her daughter. "What were you expecting?"

"I don't know, I was sort of expecting you to be a more adult or something," Rose admitted, feeling a bit silly once she said it since she knew how old she was when she died.

"That sounds boring," Lily replied with a grin. "Joking aside, I spent a couple of years fighting a war before I got murdered by a lunatic, I'm allowed to have a couple of days of fun before I jump back into the fight."

"Is there a reason we can't just bomb Malfoy manor while he's inside?" Henry asked, wondering if they had different wards than what he remembered.

"Moral or practical?" Sirius asked thoughtfully, not seeing a lot of reasons to play by the rules since the Ministry already wanted to kill him.

"Draco's not a Death Eater," Remus pointed out.

"He's a Malfoy," Tiger said, thinking about the shit Draco had pulled over the years.

"From a practical standpoint, they have wards," Sirius cut in before Remus stuck his foot in his mouth.

"I need earplugs," Tonks muttered, making a mental note to obliviate her knowledge of the conversation if they actually went through with it.

"Unless the wards are radically different, they won't survive dropping a truck filled with explosives from a thousand feet up," Henry pointed out.

"Personal experience?" Lily asked.

"Yes," Henry replied with a faint grin as if recalling a happy memory.

"That sounds like a good way to screw up the statute," the older Lily pointed out.

"Not if you turn it invisible before you portkey it a thousand feet up," Henry pointed out.

"Especially if you do it in the middle of the night," Sirius suggested. "We'll want to wait until Draco and Narcissa leave but it's not a horrible idea if we can't figure out a better way to kill Voldemort."

"I don't have an objection if you're waiting," Remus offered as Harry, James and Severus walked back in.

"Can you teach us the slime spell?" Lily asked Harry.

"Yeah, not a problem," Harry replied as he pulled the spell tile out of his pocket. "This should let everyone learn the spell, you just concentrate on it."

Sirius pulled his wand and waved it in Harry's general direction, using the Gemino charm to copy the spell tile. "That should speed things up."

"That's assuming it actually works…" Harry trailed off as the tile Sirius was holding turned to dust. "I'm guessing that means it didn't work?"

"It worked but I grabbed the wrong spell," Sirius replied then copied the tile again. "Everyone Gemino copies."

"Remember to actually get the slime one," Remus told people.

Harry just held the tile out as they hit it with spells, rather amused and looking forward to the havoc he knew was coming as the spell to conjure slimes was going to be handed to the Weasley twins, both sets of them.