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ChaosExceed
ChaosExceed

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Personal Struggles and Advancements

I've been reliably posting Art on Pixiv twice a week for over a year now. Never missed a deadline until now, and I feel like I won't in the future.


When I started, I wasn't able to finish two Illustrations a week. I don't know how many of you know me from my Twitter times, but I'm sure there won't be many. As I started posting twice a week, I actually had maybe 30 finished Illustrations ready so I only had to finish one a week and still could upload 2. So it had been actually close to when I opened my FANBOX where my backload of finished Illustrations had gone dry.


At that point I felt some sort of despair. "Would I be able to keep this pace up?"

Summer wasn't over at that point and I'm honestly not able to perform over heat periods, like I get heavily depressed.


Somehow, I didn't want to stop posting 2 Illustrations a week, as that summer was a time where my Drawings really started getting attention and somehow, I pulled through.


Not only that but after starting FANBOX, I was also able to do extra variations for my supporters, sometimes up to 10 for a single Illustration. As an Artist, I feel like I've been evolving a lot lately. I'm still faaaaar away from where I want to be, but I consider myself at least decent which wasn't the case before.


I don't know if you feel the same, but looking back at my Drawings from a year ago, I definitely have gotten a bit better, and also a considerable bit faster.


Now, Summer is beginning anew, I'm already suffering heavily from the heat and stand before a new challenge. Living in a big City, without fresh air, temperatures going over 30ยฐC, I'm sure many of you are suffering as well. But my limit is around 15ยฐC. Anything warmer than that and I'm uncomfortable. I dress in the Winter times like most people would dress at summer, so this is a problem for me.


Until now, I've been able to master the Challenges I had, so I'm certain I will jump over this hurdle as well. Seeing my own progress and having your support is really pushing me forward, even through these insufferable temperatures. Maybe I really can someday call this my job.


I'm also working on a game. This is unrelated to everything I do here and it's "just" a RPG Maker game, but it's another passion I have. So maybe I can share something of that here too if you're interested. It's gonna be a big Dungeon Crawler with Base management Systems and a Gacha Character System. But more on that only if you are interested.


Well, I thank you for reading this. By the way, maybe I will be returning to twitter someday, I just have to explain to my old followers from there why I suddenly started drawing feet, haha.


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ใ‚‚ใ†1ๅนดไปฅไธŠใ€้€ฑใซ2ๅ›žใ€็ขบๅฎŸใซPixivใซArtใ‚’ๆŠ•็จฟใ—ใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚ไปŠใพใงไธ€ๅบฆใ‚‚็ท ใ‚ๅˆ‡ใ‚Šใซ้…ใ‚ŒใŸใ“ใจใฏใชใ„ใ—ใ€ใ“ใ‚Œใ‹ใ‚‰ใ‚‚ใชใ„ใ ใ‚ใ†ใจๆ€ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚


ๅง‹ใ‚ใŸๅฝ“ๅˆใฏใ€้€ฑใซ2ๆžšใฎIllustrationใ‚’ไป•ไธŠใ’ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ›ใ‚“ใงใ—ใŸใ€‚Twitterใฎๅ›žใง็งใ‚’็Ÿฅใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ไบบใŒใฉใ‚Œใ ใ‘ใ„ใ‚‹ใฎใ‹ใ‚ใ‹ใ‚Šใพใ›ใ‚“ใŒใ€ใใฃใจๅคšใใฏใชใ„ใงใ—ใ‚‡ใ†ใ€‚้€ฑ2ๅ›žใฎใƒšใƒผใ‚นใงๆŠ•็จฟใ™ใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซใชใฃใฆใ€ๅฎŸใฏ30ๆžšใใ‚‰ใ„ๅฎŒๆˆใ—ใŸใ‚คใƒฉใ‚นใƒˆใŒใ‚ใฃใŸใฎใงใ€้€ฑ1ๆžšไป•ไธŠใ’ใ‚Œใฐ2ๆžšใ‚ขใƒƒใƒ—ใงใใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซใชใ‚Šใพใ—ใŸใ€‚ใ ใ‹ใ‚‰ใ€ๅฎŸใฏFANBOXใ‚’้–‹ใ„ใŸ้ ƒใซใ€ๅฎŒๆˆใ—ใŸใ‚คใƒฉใ‚นใƒˆใฎใƒใƒƒใ‚ฏใƒญใƒผใƒ‰ใŒๆžฏๆธ‡ใ—ใฆใ—ใพใฃใŸใ‚“ใงใ™ใ€‚


ใใฎๆ™‚ใ€ใ‚ใ‚‹็จฎใฎ็ตถๆœ›ใ‚’ๆ„Ÿใ˜ใŸใ‚“ใงใ™ใ€‚ใ€Œใ“ใฎใพใพใง่‰ฏใ„ใฎใ ใ‚ใ†ใ‹...ใ€ใจใ€‚

ใใฎๆ™‚็‚นใงใฏใพใ ๅคใ‚‚็ต‚ใ‚ใฃใฆใ„ใชใ‹ใฃใŸใ—ใ€ๆญฃ็›ดใ€ๆฟ€ใ—ใ่ฝใก่พผใ‚€ใ‚ˆใ†ใชๆš‘ใ„ๆ™‚ๆœŸใซใฏใƒ‘ใƒ•ใ‚ฉใƒผใƒžใƒณใ‚นใŒ็™บๆฎใงใใชใ„ใ€‚


ใงใ‚‚ใ€้€ฑ2ๅ›žใฎใ‚คใƒฉใ‚นใƒˆๆŠ•็จฟใ‚’ใ‚„ใ‚ใŸใใชใ‹ใฃใŸใ‚“ใงใ™ใ€‚ใ‚ใฎๅคใฏใ€ใƒ‰ใƒญใƒผใ‚คใƒณใ‚ฐใŒๆณจ็›ฎใ•ใ‚Œๅง‹ใ‚ใŸๆ™‚ๆœŸใ ใฃใŸใฎใงใ€ไฝ•ใจใ‹ไน—ใ‚Šๅˆ‡ใ‚Šใพใ—ใŸใ€‚


ใใ‚Œใ ใ‘ใงใชใใ€FANBOXใ‚’ๅง‹ใ‚ใฆใ‹ใ‚‰ใฏใ€ๅฟœๆดใ—ใฆใใ ใ•ใ‚‹ๆ–นใฎใŸใ‚ใซใƒใƒชใ‚จใƒผใ‚ทใƒงใƒณใ‚’ๅข—ใ‚„ใ™ใ“ใจใ‚‚ใงใใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซใชใ‚Šใ€1ใคใฎใ‚คใƒฉใ‚นใƒˆใง10็จฎ้กžใใ‚‰ใ„ใซใชใ‚‹ใ“ใจใ‚‚ใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ—ใŸใ€‚ใ‚ขใƒผใƒ†ใ‚ฃใ‚นใƒˆใจใ—ใฆใ€ๆœ€่ฟ‘ใ™ใ”ใ้€ฒๅŒ–ใ—ใฆใ„ใ‚‹ๆฐ—ใŒใ—ใพใ™ใ€‚ใพใ ใ€ใชใ‚ŠใŸใ„่‡ชๅˆ†ใซใฏ็จ‹้ ใ„ใงใ™ใŒใ€ไปฅๅ‰ใจใฏ้•ใ„ใ€ใใ“ใใ“ใฎใƒฌใƒ™ใƒซใซใฏใชใฃใฆใใŸใจ่‡ชๅˆ†ใงใฏๆ€ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚


็š†ใ•ใ‚“ใ‚‚ใใ†ๆ€ใ†ใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใพใ›ใ‚“ใŒใ€1ๅนดๅ‰ใฎใƒ‰ใƒญใƒผใ‚คใƒณใ‚ฐใ‚’่ฆ‹่ฟ”ใ™ใจใ€็ขบๅฎŸใซๅฐ‘ใ—ใฏ่‰ฏใใชใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใ—ใ€ใ‚นใƒ”ใƒผใƒ‰ใ‚‚็›ธๅฝ“ไธŠใŒใฃใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚


ใ•ใฆใ€ๅคใŒๅง‹ใพใ‚Šใ€็งใฏใ™ใงใซๆš‘ใ•ใซ่€ใˆใชใŒใ‚‰ใ€ๆ–ฐใŸใชๆŒ‘ๆˆฆใฎๅ‰ใซ็ซ‹ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚ๅคง้ƒฝไผšใซไฝใ‚“ใงใ„ใฆใ€ๆ–ฐ้ฎฎใช็ฉบๆฐ—ใ‚‚ใชใใ€30โ„ƒใ‚’่ถ…ใˆใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใชๆš‘ใ•ใซๆ‚ฉใพใ•ใ‚Œใฆใ„ใ‚‹ๆ–นใฏๅคšใ„ใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚ใงใ‚‚ใ€็งใฎ้™็•Œใฏ15โ„ƒใใ‚‰ใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚ใใ‚ŒไปฅไธŠใฎๆฐ—ๆธฉใซใชใ‚‹ใจใ€ไธๅฟซใซใชใ‚Šใพใ™ใ€‚ๅ†ฌใฏๆ™ฎ้€šใฎไบบใŒๅคใซ็€ใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใชๆœ่ฃ…ใ‚’ใ—ใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใฎใงใ€ใ“ใ‚Œใฏๅ›ฐใฃใŸใ“ใจใงใ™ใ€‚


ไปŠใพใงใฏใ€่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎๆŒใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹่ชฒ้กŒใ‚’ๅ…‹ๆœใ™ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใŒใงใใŸใฎใงใ€ใ“ใฎใƒใƒผใƒ‰ใƒซใ‚‚ๅฟ…ใšไน—ใ‚Š่ถŠใˆใ‚‰ใ‚Œใ‚‹ใจไฟกใ˜ใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚ ่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎๆˆ้•ทใ‚’ๅฎŸๆ„Ÿใ—ใ€็š†ใ•ใ‚“ใซๅฟœๆดใ—ใฆใ„ใŸใ ใใ“ใจใงใ€ใ“ใฎๅŽณใ—ใ„ๆฐ—ๆธฉใฎไธญใงใ‚‚ใ€ๅ‰ใซ้€ฒใ‚€ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ™ใ€‚ใ„ใคใ‹ๆœฌๅฝ“ใซใ€ใ“ใ‚Œใ‚’ไป•ไบ‹ใจๅ‘ผในใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซใชใ‚‹ใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใพใ›ใ‚“ใญใ€‚


็งใฏใ‚ฒใƒผใƒ ใซใ‚‚ๅ–ใ‚Š็ต„ใ‚“ใงใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚ใ“ใ‚Œใฏ็งใŒใ“ใ“ใงใ‚„ใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใจใฏ็„ก้–ขไฟ‚ใงใ€RPGใƒกใƒผใ‚ซใƒผใฎใ‚ฒใƒผใƒ ใ€Œใ ใ‘ใ€ใชใฎใงใ™ใŒใ€็งใฎใ‚‚ใ†ใฒใจใคใฎๆƒ…็†ฑใชใฎใงใ™ใ€‚ใ ใ‹ใ‚‰ใ€ใ‚‚ใ—่ˆˆๅ‘ณใŒใ‚ใ‚Œใฐใ€ใ“ใ“ใงใ‚‚ไฝ•ใ‹ๅ…ฑๆœ‰ใงใใ‚‹ใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใชใ„ใญใ€‚ใ“ใ‚Œใฏใ€ๆ‹ ็‚น็ฎก็†ใ‚ทใ‚นใƒ†ใƒ ใจใ‚ฌใƒใƒฃใ‚ญใƒฃใƒฉใ‚ฏใ‚ฟใƒผใ‚ทใ‚นใƒ†ใƒ ใ‚’ๅ‚™ใˆใŸใ€ๅคงใใชใƒ€ใƒณใ‚ธใƒงใƒณใ‚ฏใƒญใƒผใƒฉใƒผใซใชใ‚‹ไบˆๅฎšใงใ™ใ€‚ใ—ใ‹ใ—ใ€ใใ‚Œใซใคใ„ใฆใฏใ€ใ‚ใชใŸใŒ่ˆˆๅ‘ณใ‚’ๆŒใฃใŸๅ ดๅˆใซใฎใฟใ€่ฉณใ—ใ่ชฌๆ˜Žใ—ใพใ™ใ€‚


ใ•ใฆใ€ใ“ใ‚Œใ‚’่ชญใ‚“ใงใใ‚Œใฆใ‚ใ‚ŠใŒใจใ†ใ”ใ–ใ„ใพใ—ใŸใ€‚ใจใ“ใ‚ใงใ€็งใฏใ„ใคใ‹twitterใซๆˆปใ‚‹ใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใพใ›ใ‚“ใ€ใชใœ็งใŒ็ช็„ถ่ถณใ‚’ๆใๅง‹ใ‚ใŸใฎใ‹ใ€twitterใฎๅคใ„ใƒ•ใ‚ฉใƒญใƒฏใƒผใซ่ชฌๆ˜Žใ—ใชใ‘ใ‚Œใฐใชใ‚Šใพใ›ใ‚“ใ€ใƒใƒใ€‚




Comments

As long as I dream, I'll be trying to achieve those dreams. As cheesy as it sounds, it keeps me going even if I feel down. I am really thankful for your words and support, it helps a lot!

ChaosExceed

It's sad to read about the despair you had endured, but I'm happy you were able to keep pushing through and reach a point where you're happy with what you're doing. It sucks that air conditioning isn't more popular where you live. (I live in America, so it's rare to find a building without air conditioning that wasn't voluntarily removed.) I've only been a fan since March but I wish I were a fan sooner...

a10e19

Thank you! I'm gonna keep doing my best!

ChaosExceed

It's more random than some might think. Back then, I wasn't even into feet, but it seemed like those were the thing people liked most about my works. I only really found out after gaining access to Pixiv Analytics and seized the chance. Well, thinking back, I may have provoked that reaction though as I always felt more comfortable than most artists drawing Hands and Feet as an amateur and liked to show that. It could be interesting to write a blog entry here about that topic because I think it's a random accumulation of coincidences.

ChaosExceed

The feet you draw really good and lovely, love it!!!

ๅœŸๆ’ฅ้ผ  Marmot (ddante123)

That last line really makes me wonder why you did end up drawing feet...


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