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Malcolm Tent
Malcolm Tent

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Wish upon the Stars chapter 975

It was time to leave. Two days since the resurrection, one hundred and eight scrolls on hand, all my locals paid up and ready to head off…and I was going my own way. “You need to be careful with that dragon,” I told Benny sternly. “I know Sebastian is going to be helping you learn to work with it, but it’s still a dangerous animal. You need to treat it with respect, and feed it, and take it for walks.”

“It’s undead, Shane, it doesn’t eat. Or atrophy. Or care if it goes on walks.” His voice was exasperated, but kind of hoarse, and I could tell this was going to be tough for him too. I leaned forward and pulled my friend into a tight hug.

“Just take care of yourself, idiot,” I told him roughly. “Don’t make Celine worry about you. She’d be super bummed if you got eaten by a zombie lizard.”

He snorted. “First of all, Toast is NOT a zombie, that’s an incredibly low class form of undead and even saying it is insulting. Second of all, you want ME to take care of myself? Anyone want to take bets on how many dead gods Shane is going to unearth on this trip? Because statistically the answer is ‘more than zero’.”

“Benicio Cortez,” my wife said threateningly. “If you just jinxed my honeymoon I’m going to throw you off the tallest building I can find with an anchor tied to your boots.”

He just shrugged. “Jinxes aren’t real. You’ll be fine. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“I will STAB you!” Callie hissed, manifesting Gossamer in one hand as she stepped towards my best friend menacingly.

“Kidding!” Benny squeaked. “I was kidding, please don’t impale me on your giant demon weapon. I’m just a harmless little D-ranker.” He darted behind Celine, who rolled her eyes, but we were all pretty relaxed. If Callie had ACTUALLY meant to hurt him he’d be hurt.

I grinned at the elf girl my friend was so crazy about, someone we’d known for years now and who I’d trusted to basically own a planet for me, and considered how far we’d come. From her betrayal back on Callus to her help on Stratholme, Celine had been with us through so much. “So, you excited to have him all to yourself? I think he’s still in warranty if you’re sick of him. Maybe return him for a nicer model.”

She chuckled at that. “I would, I suspect, miss him.” She gave my best friend a soft smile, the kind I recognized from the looks I got when Callie was feeling affectionate. “He’s…special. He’s always been there. Whenever I needed him. I’m sure you know what I mean.”

“I do,” I said without hesitation. “Take care of him for me, will you? He’s got this stupid idea that he needs to catch up to me. I’m worried he’ll overdo it.” She nodded solemnly.

“I am RIGHT next to you,” Benny protested. “Like, I can hear you both. This is super demeaning. Wait, Shane, where are you going? You can’t just walk away while I’m still talking! You’re such a dick!” He called that last one at me from a few feet away, and I had to work not to laugh as I strolled off.

Callie caught up with me, smiling wryly. “You could have said an actual goodbye, you know. You two don’t have to be dysfunctional ALL the time.”

“We function fine,” I said with a shrug. “And this way is better. He would have been all sad if we’d just said a teary goodbye. Now he’s annoyed and motivated. He won’t get all weepy for another few hours, and by that point we’ll be gone. It’s just…I get the feeling I won’t see him for a while. Not forever, obviously, but…for a while. Longer than the few months we’re spending on the honeymoon.”

She took my hand and squeezed, but didn’t comment. My instincts could be complex, but they weren’t often wrong. I just had to hope whatever the reason was, it wouldn’t be something negative.

“You finish saying your goodbyes?” my mom asked as we approached my family. “My mother is taking us home in the Acheron, and the rest of your people will be heading for Stratholme on the Necromedes. Obviously, we’ve got a small party coming along, of course.” She pointed to the crowd of people behind her.

Gabe, Holly, Serah, Fade, Alanna, and of course my sister. But more unusual than that was…”Bethy why are you coming on my honeymoon?”

“She’s not,” Chelsea said primly. “She’s coming home with ME. Got a problem?”

I just laughed. “I mean, I don’t, but is the holy dominion really ready for Bethany Lark? Give those poor people a chance.”

Bethy stuck her tongue out at me. “I’m not going to do anything. I’m just going to check out the fashion shows. Seraph is the crown jewel of the universal fashion industry. They’re doing things there with water vapors that are going to revolutionize the textile industry, and don’t even get me STARTED on lightweave.”

“My mistake,” I said apologetically, holding up my hands. “Happy to have you aboard. And you two?” I hadn’t seen the angel sisters in a while, so it was surprising to find them lined up with everyone else, after all, it wasn’t like my sister needed guards.

Holly scoffed. “Your wife is an ARCHANGEL now,” she said derisively. “The tower doesn’t even have one of those. Our Tower Master is a Throne. So we’re sticking to her until we can convince her to pay a visit. Plus we have so much we can teach her about how to use her powers. Magic bullshit soul weapon and magic fire aside, she doesn’t know much about being an angel. We can help.”

Serah nodded solemnly. “We’ll make sure her competence soars.”

“Right,” I said with an eye roll. “Well if she doesn’t care it’s not really my business. Just don’t bug her when she’s trying to relax and we’ll be all good. So…where is dad? Is he hiding from one of my uncles? Are they coming to pick us up?”

Mom snickered. “My oldest brother Samuel is coming. He was in the neighborhood and wants to meet his nephew.”

“Uncle Sam is coming!” Chelsea squealed happily. “That’s amazing! I haven't seen him in ages! Is he bringing Roxy?” Seeing my sister so excited about relatives left me feeling a little conflicted, but mostly just enthusiastic. They must be pretty great people for her to be this worked up.

My mom shook her head. “Roxanne is deployed as an attache to one of the legions the empire lent us. Samuel is coming by himself. He travels faster that way anyway.”

“And dad is afraid of him?” I asked with amusement.

Zeke snorted. “Your father is not AFRAID of Samuel…he’s terrified. Like a little baby. It’s hilarious. I thought he was going to cry when Sasha told us.” He threw back his head and laughed mercilessly…and loudly. I was sure my dad had heard that, and that Zeke had meant him to.

“I am NOT terrified,” my father said as he stepped out from behind a nearby stone pillar. “I simply assumed that things would go smoother if I let Samuel calm down and greet his niece and nephew before he saw me. And possibly if we had a couple of human shields in the way when it finally happened. For SASHA’S sake, because I know she doesn’t want her brother to get hurt.”

“Ezekial, please don’t TAUNT my husband when I’m trying to deescalate his meeting with my brother,” my mom said acidly. “Don’t forget I’m asking my mother to take Stacy on for training. I don’t expect gratitude, but baseline civility would be nice.”

Zeke was about to respond when he was cut off by a booming voice. “BABY SISTER!” Bellowed a person so LOUD that the wall of sound from his shout pushed my BOOTS a couple of inches. Then there was an explosion of air pressure hitting me in the face and my mother was being picked up and squeezed in a spine cracking hug that I was worried might snap her back in two.

The man holding her was…big. Like…absurdly big. Seven feet tall, long flowing blonde hair like a lion’s mane, well groomed blonde beard and bright blue eyes. He had a wide smile on his face that seemed like it belonged there, and he was already setting mom down and turning to beam at Chelsea before any of us had time to relax. “And my favorite niece! Don’t tell Lara or Sonya, they’ll go crying to my brother and I don’t want to listen to Eric bitch.”

Chelsea giggled, wrapping him in a warm hug. “Your secret is safe with me, Uncle Sam.”

He pulled away, then rounded on me, his grin wide and welcoming. “And THIS must be Shane. Look at the size of you, boy! That’s how I know you’re an Anders. None of those tiny little Wyndham noodle arms here. And that ARMOR. That’s suit’s a real beauty! Come here!” He pulled ME into a hug next, and I just kind of…stood there. He laughed, then stepped away, still patting my back hard enough that I had to bend my knees not to fall over.

But his jovial mood vanished in an instant when his eyes settled on my dad. “Elijah,” he said coldly. He walked towards him slowly, his steps measured, and I think we were all waiting for him to attack. Instead, he held out a hand. My dad looked at it like a venomous snake, but eventually reached out to take it and-

I didn’t see what happened next. It was too fast. But because of the aftermath and the distortion in the air, I was vaguely able to reconstruct the probable events. Step one, Sam grabs dads hand. Step two, Sam pulls dad forward. Step three, Sam slams his forehead into dads nose so hard it breaks spewing blood everywhere. There was no step four. My dad stumbled back, nose gushing like a fountain, and my mom whirled on her brother in a rage. “Samuel Aloysius Anders!” She hissed. “What was THAT for?”

“That was for making you cry,” he said bluntly. “I told him if he ever did that I’d break his face. Cause. Effect. We’re good now. Right Eli?”

Grunting in annoyance, my dad nodded. “It’s fine, love,” he assured my mom. “He’s not wrong. He DID warn me. Admittedly I kind of assumed he meant it in a traditional, rhetorical sense. But I can’t say I wasn’t told in advance. You have an unusually hard head, Samuel.”

“If you idiots are done,” called a voice from behind us. I turned to find my grandmother looking none too pleased, and I noticed Uncle Sam duck his head to avoid eye contact. “We really should be on our way. It’s a month to Seraph, even with the Acheron, and I want to make good time.”

Uncle Sam hunched his shoulders. “Sorry mama,” he muttered. Then walked past her towards the ship. Celia just rolled her eyes at him. I did note that when he passed my grandfather, Nicholas gave him a pleased nod, then quickly looked away when his wife turned to glare at him. I couldn’t say I wasn’t amused my self. I’d been planning something similar when I saw him again the first time, after all. Must run in the family.

Callie didn’t seem too upset either as she folded my arm around hers and followed me into the ship, the others taking up a steady pace behind us. My mom, meanwhile, fussed over my dad despite his insistence that it was fine, and weirdly, despite all the chaos and nonsense, I couldn’t help but smile. This…this was what family felt like. And I kind of loved it. I had a feeling this trip back to mom’s homeworld was going to be a fun one.

Comments

Oh, I like Samuel. An over the top, loud, but ultimately caring dude? My kinda people.

LobskiTheMagicLobster

Damn i lost half a sandwich... And a fiver but those are worthless.

Peter Smith

Based on how this guy acts i wouldn't be suprised if he and the other brothers show up with 18 years worth of birthday gifts disguised as honeymoon gifts.

Anime Problem

And that's the end of book 14 folks! Book 15 starts tomorrow!

Malcolm Tent


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