4 - An Innocent Chat with the Queen
Added 2024-10-02 21:00:08 +0000 UTCComments
Thanks for the chapter! Suggestions: “Misplaced?” That was an odd. How could a goddess lose a thing? -> “Misplaced?” That was odd. How could a goddess lose a thing? But she only shrugged. “Forewarned is forearmed. You know what will be com ing. Prepare yourself for it. And with that in mind, to your Quest.” -> A unnecessary paragraph space. “That is how it civilized realms handle such things,” -> “That is how the civilized realms handle such things,” She clucked at me disapprovingly, then with a flick of her finger, vanished my shame into who-knew-where. -> A unnecessary paragraph space. Between vanished and my. I can have more that one aim at once. -> I can have more than one aim at once.
BrokenOlive
2024-12-31 12:09:36 +0000 UTCHa!
Nathaniel Bartley Logee
2024-10-08 21:55:09 +0000 UTCDonum clan motto: Live fast, die several times.
Ryan
2024-10-05 02:28:30 +0000 UTCWell... it isn't going to be the next chapter.
Nathaniel Bartley Logee
2024-10-04 21:52:59 +0000 UTCShe tasted like… The edge of a cliff. Time for a classic quest for the elixir of youth. I hope there’s some downtime soon where the crew can relax a bit, I’m feeling stressed just reading it.
Ryan
2024-10-03 09:28:48 +0000 UTC
