Hottie in the Mirror Part 3 Rough Draft

It's here! After a lot of hard work, I'm proud to present part three of "Hottie in the Mirror"

Normally, even when I release a "rough draft", I have at least done a pass for spelling and grammar. In this case I finished writing this minutes ago. So in other words, it might be an even rougher and rawer draft than usual. I hope it is readable.

I wanted to push this out to you right away because if possible I want to edit this one and release it as soon as I can. So any feedback in the next few days would be much appreciated.

There are definitely some parts of this draft that need more work. Below I have put a few notes on things I want to work on when revising the draft. Any comments on these notes would be helpful of you have the time!

As always, when I spend so much time on a project, I lose all perspective on whether the story is good or bad, so please let me know if this one is a real turkey before I release it to the general public if that's the case.

Please read and vote to let me know how you like the story! What follows are some notes on the draft:

WARNING: READ THE STORY FIRST, THERE ARE SPOILERS IN THE NOTES

1. I considered having Alex continue to watch porn and masturbate while on the phone with Anton. I I decided against it to emphasize how hard he is trying to resist his attraction to Anton, but I'm not sure if this was the right call

2. The emotional beat of the basketball scene is supposed to be Alex's one last big try to be a man among men and his humiliating failure. I need to reread and make sure this is being hit very clearly.

3. Does the twist that Claire was in the room the whole time feel cheap? To be fair, this twist was planned from the beginning, although Claire's role in the plot changed a little from my initial plan. If it does feel cheap, it might be too late to change things, but I might fiddle with the reveal a little.

4. The early part of the Claire/Lexi makeover date feels a bit choppy and forced to me. Needs some rewrites. The scene where Claire convinces Alex to become Lexi full time for a while is pivotal, and I will be taking a close look at it to be sure it lands.

5. I'm worried that the call with Jake feels out of place. The reason it is in this chapter is to set up an important plot element in part four, but I'm concerned that it feels out of nowhere here. It does serve the purpose of immediately making Lexi's makeover and commitment to full-time femininity humiliating.

6. I feel like I'm going to hear some disappointment over the fact that I shortened a month of anal training for Lexi into a "montage" rather than spreading it into a full chapter. I just felt that a full chapter of Lexi slowly getting better at anal sex while doing strictly hand and mouth stuff with Anton would be boring in practice.

7. Would it be better if Claire used the dildos as a strap-on? I went back and forth on this, but decided that her using them by hand would make Lexi's first time having sex with Anton more special.

8. I worried that the dream sequence might be too over-the-top...

9. With how this story ballooned, I am concerned that the foundational "Bullying Incident" might be a little anti-climactic. I wanted it to be something that confused Alex's sexuality, while not being so crazy that it wasn't believable. But I could see someone reading about this big bad bullying incident Alex has hinted at and saying "lol, that's it?"

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