Hop To It - Advance 5

[Gamma]

Unedited transcript of the Emerald Coast News interview with a defected Eggman robot

Reporter Gabrielle Ritten: Thank you again for agreeing to interview with us.

E-102 Gamma: I have been convinced that this will be a worthwhile endeavor.

GR: Before we begin, can you tell me why you chose to speak with Emerald Coast News over the other publications that approached you?

Gamma: I was directed to you by a friend of a friend.

GR: I see. Well, Mr…. Gamma, is that what I’m meant to call you?

Gamma: Correct.

GR: You caused quite a stir a few months ago. Station Square was being terrorized by Doctor Eggman, and when that giant monster attacked many of us thought we were done for! So imagine our surprise when one of Eggman’s own robots arrived to save the day. Some people were wondering if the Doctor had had a crisis of conscience for a while.

Gamma: Highly unlikely. The Doctor has not in my experience ever expressed concern for someone other than himself.

GR: So, then why did you save all those people?

Gamma: I chose to do so. It was a logical extrapolation of my first self-assigned task.

Gamma: I recognize that this may require context. Allow me to start from the beginning.

GR: Please do.

Gamma: Approximately two months before what is now known as the Perfect Chaos Incident, I was created as the second model of Doctor Robotnik’s E-series line of elite badniks. My first experience was being pitted against my older brother, E-101 Beta, and defeating him. Afterwards, Beta was tossed aside and immediately forgotten about. I did not know enough then to recognize the feeling, but that, so soon, was the first time I doubted the Doctor’s methods.

Gamma: He created us with the capacity to become people, and still treated us as disposable.

GR: Oh. …What happened next?

Gamma: Over the next two months leading up to the discovery of Chaos, I distinguished myself as Eggman’s most successful elite. Beta was allowed to accompany us, but was rarely sent on missions, and my younger siblings Delta, Epsilon and Zeta proved less effective than I. Eventually, while hunting for the Chaos Emeralds, I was tasked with hunting down a specific frog that had somehow eaten a piece of Chaos, and an Emerald as well.

GR: A frog? How did that happen? What was a frog doing with a Chaos Emerald?

Gamma: The frog belonged to a resident of Mystic Jungle, who possessed the Emerald. I do not know more. To continue, I successfully retrieved the animal, where my brothers failed to even find one that was green, and were tossed aside like Beta. My mission complete, I was then left to my own devices for a time, which I used to try and take another Emerald-laden animal for the Doctor: a bird that was accompanying Amy Rose.

GR: Amy Rose. That name sounds familiar. Isn’t she one of Sonic’s friends?

Gamma: Indeed. She rebuked me.

GR: She fought you off?

Gamma: False. Her actions forced me to analyse my own existence. She was imprisoned, disarmed, and completely at the Doctor’s mercy, and yet she defended a mere animal from a superior foe. She was frightened, but stood up for those weaker than her. I could not understand why. And when I expressed this, she turned my words back on me by asking why I served Eggman.

Gamma: It was not a question I had ever needed to ask myself before. It was simply the nature of my existence. But then Amy Rose attempted to appeal to my better nature, which confused me so much that I simply… let them go.

GR: Just like that?

Gamma: Just like that.

GR: Huh. If it’s that easy, why don’t more of Eggman’s robots defect?

Gamma: It was not easy at all. There were extenuating factors, massive coincidences involved, and my own design quirks allowing me greater freedom of thought than other badniks.

GR: What kind of coincidences?

Gamma: …I would prefer not to say.

Gamma: Continuing. Shortly after releasing her, Sonic and Tails arrived on the Egg Carrier. I was ordered by Eggman to battle him while the Doctor fled, and I immediately understood that I was being sacrificed. Amy Rose talked Sonic and myself down, and then the Egg Carrier was destroyed and we all became separated during the crash.

Gamma: Afterwards, left bereft and with no loyalty to the Doctor remaining, I was forced to decide my OWN mission. Are you aware of the Doctor’s history of using animals as power sources for his machines?

GR: I’ve heard that’s what he does, but I never believed it. I couldn’t imagine how it even worked. Are you saying it’s true?

Gamma: He experiments with other battery types on occasion, but he has perfected the animal battery. It is not the most powerful he has available, but it is the most reliable. All of the E-series robots were powered by them.

GR: …Wait, all? Does that include you?

Gamma: I recalled the care Amy had for her bird friend, and I decided to expand on that. I made it my new mission to undo the cruelty of Dr. Eggman by destroying my brothers and freeing the animals within. And I succeeded, destroying one after another Delta, Epsilon, and Zeta… and Beta. And then only one was left.

GR: …

Gamma: …I believed that the end of my mission would require a sacrifice. It was one I was willing to make. But luckily, I had friends willing to convince me otherwise.

GR: And then the flooding?

Gamma: Correct. After seeing Heyu and Big rescuing civilians, I realized that I was uniquely suited to the task with my multiple terrain configurations, and committed the rest of my energy to saving lives. Afterwards, when the crisis was over, I allowed my battery to go free, shutting down. Tails has only recently powered me back on.

GR: That’s quite a tale, Gamma. Thank you for sharing. Can I ask what you’re being powered by now, if not an animal?

Gamma: I am uncertain I should, as I am unaware of its current patent status. I will say that the technology is an original creation of Tails and Humi.

GR: Right, moving on. You actually aren’t the first “goodnik” in Station Square. Y-Iota is pretty well-known to the locals.

Gamma: Yes, my younger brother. Formerly E-108 Iota, he was destroyed and then rebuilt by Miss Humi.

GR: I noticed that you still introduce yourself as “E-102.” Is there a reason for that?

Gamma: Iota was rebuilt from a head. Most of his original parts have been replaced, and he is more a creation of Humi and Tails than of Eggman now. I am still 95% my original parts, and I see no need to alter my name to reflect my allegiance. Perhaps in time, I will change my mind. For now, I am not concerned with it.

GR: Well put. Now, you’ve mentioned several of these friends at this point. What can you tell us about them?

Gamma: I will gladly tell you about Tails and Amy and Humi. I will not be telling you much about Heyu, however, as he requested. He values his privacy, you see.

(cont.)

-----------------------------

[Heyu]

That alligator was still parked on our lawn.

It occurred to me, when we ran into him at the station, that I wasn’t aware that it was even possible to get from Station Square to Mystic Ruins without the train. I didn’t think there was a road.

Turns out, there isn’t. Fry drove over miles of barely traversable hunting trails to get to Mystic Station, and then again over the ancient brick roads and to get from there to our house, and his tires were put through so much abuse that they finally gave up the ghost. So he was stuck.

I watched him go about his day from the porch, sipping from a soda can. The tires were leaking at different rates, I guess, or maybe the ground underneath was just uneven. Regardless of why, the food truck was off balance and making things difficult. Fry was trying to fix it so he could get on with things, but he didn’t have a jack or anything.

He tried to lift the back of the truck himself, and it almost looked like he was going to make it, but then he lost his grip and dropped it on his foot. He had to squeeze out of his shoe to get away.

“Humi,” I said, turning my head slightly. “Do you have any spare tires?”

She popped out the window to look. “...Not sized for a vehicle that big.”

I frowned. “Where’s that G.U.N. robot you put together?”

After a moment to get our things sorted, me and Humi walked the Hunter over to the truck.

Fry looked up as we approached, wearing a fixed grin. “Uh, howdy! If you’re looking to buy, I’m afraid I’m a little, uh… I’m facing some technical difficulties right now.”

I nodded to Humi, and she made the Hunter move to lift the truck off its back wheels. The robot’s feet sunk slightly in the dirt, but it held.

Fry blinked. “Whoa.”

Humi quickly moved to remove the busted tires, then slapped together a mix of cinderblock and wood for the wheel rim to rest on. The Hunter set it down and moved on to the front.

Fry finally reacted before it could lift again. “Wait, hold on. The front’s got nonstandard construction. You gotta hold it right or you'll crack the frame.” He adjusted the Hunter’s grip and once it was lifted he helped get the tires off. “Thanks, guys. I was running out of ideas.”

I shrugged, smiling. “Don’t worry about it. It looks like we’re neighbors for the foreseeable future, until we can get a mechanic to come all the way out here. And neighbors take care of each other.”

Humi raised a hand. “I’ll accept payment in good food!”

Fry laughed at that. “Well, that much I can manage! You officially qualify for the friends and family discount, kid!” He leaned down to inspect the blocks, still chuckling. “Mm. Yeah, these’ll do for now. If I’m here for a long while they’ll need to be shored up though. Best bet would be to make a pavement platform for it to sit on.”

Humi shook her head. “I don’t know how to do that, sorry. I’ve never worked with concrete before.”

Fry waved it off. “Don’t worry about it, simple as can be.”

“Let’s hold off on that until Iota gets back from his trip,” I suggested. “He might object to paving over a section of the grass.”

“Sure, no rush.” Fry stepped into his newly-level truck and started up his stove. “If you guys got strawberries, I’ll make some pancakes.”

Humi lit up and ran to get them while I leaned on the truck’s counter. “So, how does one end up driving a food truck anyway?”

Fry shrugged. “I like cooking and I like driving. Always wanted to travel. My last job had layoffs, and I decided, why not?”

I nodded. “Fair enough. What was your last job?”

“Construction.” Fry looked over his shoulder at me, grinning sardonically. “A’course, a few months after I was fired, the whole Chaos thing blew up, and my old place was one of the ones hired to fix the city up. Strange how life works out, huh?”

Humi came back with the bag of strawberries at that point. I grabbed a couple to snack on and handed the rest to Fry, who got to work chopping them up and adding them to the pancake mix.

My ear twitched.

I looked out to the treeline, and I would have sworn I saw something move. I frowned.

“I’ll be right back.”

Leaving Humi waiting by the truck for her food, I went over to investigate, rotating my ears to pick up any stray sounds. I pulled a large ring out of my vest and held it at the ready.

I wasn’t entirely sure what I heard; not everything my ears picked up registered on a conscious level. Whatever it was must have been familiar though, because it set off my nerves. Whatever it was was dangerous.

A bush rustled in front of me, and I tensed--until a goose waddled out from between the leaves. …Wait.

“You?” I exclaimed, pointing. It was that stupid goose that harassed us sometimes before the renovations happened! It wasn’t able to get inside anymore now that the windows had glass in them, so I assumed it just left like the rest. The woods around the house had been quiet since we returned. I could only guess that several weeks of construction had driven the local wildlife away. The prolonged silence was probably encouraging them to return, but I’d hoped the goose would stay away a bit longer.

Sadly, not so. And because I broke my hand away to point, I dropped the ring I was spinning as the connection broke, and this terrible goose grabbed it in its beak before it could hit the ground. It immediately took off, running as fast as its webbed feet could take it.

“Hey, give that back!” I ran after it. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to find rings that size?!”

----------------------------

Behind him, the bushes rustled again, and quickly made an escape.

----------------------------

[Iota]

Encyclopedia: Swallowwort, colloquially known as ‘stranglevine.’ An invasive plant that latches on to trees and grows in dense clusters. The high humidity and temperature of the jungle would normally be a mitigating factor in its growth.

Analytics: This specimen is isolated, having found a cool spot under a particularly dense canopy. Nearby instances of stranglevine are withering. This specimen is wrapped around a magnolia tree and is slowly choking it. Once the host tree dies, the leaves will fall and the vine will lose its protection from the heat.

Iota observed the botanical interaction and contemplated culling part of the vine to give the tree a chance to recover. He ultimately decided against it. Swallowwort possesses thick root systems that would be difficult to remove with current tools without harming the already-weak magnolia. Instead he marked the tree on his minimap; maybe later he would return and try to do something about it, even if it only turned out to be removing the tree once it died.

Such was nature. In order for one thing to live, something else had to die. It was tragic, but necessary, and beautiful in its own right.

Iota enjoyed wandering the jungle. There was always something new to see, and it was always changing as territory lines shifted, birds came and went with their migratory patterns, plants sprung up or fell… Mystic Ruins Jungle was alive, and it was wonderful.

He continued his hike. This deep into the jungle, there were a variety of animal tracks to be found. Animals that weren’t Mobini or birds rarely ventured close to the ruins, likely due to the extended archeological activity, so seeing scratches in bark where a leopard had sharpened its claws was interesting.

Owing to the fact that the jungle slowly transitioned into a more temperate forest as you went further west, there also deer tracks, and even the very rare bear footprint, preserved in thick mud.

Iota was very careful not to leave tracks of his own. When he could not step on stone, he endeavored to step across roots, disturbing as little as possible. He naturally didn’t want to erase the tracks by his actions, even if he was taking pictures whenever he found something that fascinated him.

Hoofprints, deer… paw print, leopard… sloth stool, fascinating, Iota didn’t know there were sloths here. Boot print…

Iota paused, zooming in on the unexpected track.

Analytics: Child’s rain galosh, size large. Right foot. Print is deep. Subject likely jumped from root onto what they assumed was solid ground and got stuck before forcibly pulling out of the mud.

Encyclopedia: Children are unlikely to get this far on their own, and a large group would leave more signs of their presence. Possibility that the subject is a Mobian using human footwear.

Tactics: Reminder.

A memory surfaced of Heyu asking him to keep an eye out for someone who allegedly vanished after taking a train to Mystic Station. But that was several weeks ago now.

Nevertheless, Iota opened up his full sensory suite. Infrared detected… birds, nesting in a tree. A sloth, slowly consuming a moss patch overhead. A small group of tree frogs. And a misshapen blob, fifty meters north-east. Iota moved towards it.

------------------------------------

[Heyu]

The bird got away with my ring.

I walked back to the house, grumbling, and found Humi and Fry setting up a plastic table and folding chairs.

Fry looked up. “Hey, just in time! Grub’s ready!”

“What’s got you looking grumpy?” Humi asked.

I waved her off. “Don’t worry about it. What do we got?”

Fry clapped his hands. “I made the strawberry pancakes, a’course, but I also whipped up some scrambled eggs and pigs-in-a-blanket.”

“Is that a breakfast food?” I asked.

“It is if you eat it in the morning,” was the reply, which, you know, fair.

I took a seat as Fry laid it out. Then I snapped my finger and got up again. “Need a drink. I’ve got… mm, Humi, you want apple or orange juice?”

“Apple.”

“What about you, Fry?”

The gator’s eye ridge rose briefly. “Uh, orange. Thanks.”

I popped in to get them. I took a bit longer than strictly necessary so I could enjoy the air conditioning, then returned with everyone’s drinks. By the time I got back, everyone’s plates had been set. I speared a pancake on a fork--

--And that was when Iota crashed out of the forest, carrying something indistinct.

“Urgent: This man needs water!”

“‘M fine… geroff me…” Whoever it was weakly batted at Iota’s arms, slurring his words.

Iota set him down on the grass next to our table, and I got a look at the strangest Mobian I’ve ever seen. I’m usually pretty good at recognizing what species morph a Mobian is, and I’ve seen a lot of different ones over my life, but I’ve never seen whatever this guy was. He was a peachy color and had smooth, shiny skin with a noticeable give wherever Iota touched him. He was wearing a raincoat and galoshes for some reason.

He was awake, but just barely. Once Iota let go of him he tried to sit up, grunting in pain, and allowing me to see the odd hat he was wearing that looked like a spiralling snail shell.

…Wait, was it a hat? Or, part of his body? Did Mobians come in snail? Or… No, this wasn’t important right now.

“What’s wrong? What happened?” I asked, standing again to look the stranger over.

“I found him while exploring. He was passed out. I believe he consumed something that poisoned him.”

The snail(?) groaned, rubbing his head. “‘M not poisoned… dun GET poisoned…”

Fry furrowed his brow. “Sorry to say this, but you’re not making a good case of that right now.”

“Shaddup… too loud…”

I looked at my glass of apple juice, sighed, and handed it to the snail. “Here.”

When I held it under his nose, he sniffed, and his eyes peeled open. “Apple juice?” he asked, voice much more clear all of a sudden, “Don’t mind if I do.”

He took the glass and downed it in one gulp. Then, perplexingly, he swished the last mouthful around for a few seconds before swallowing.

He grimaced. “...Ocean Spray? Bleh. I could make better juice in my sleep.”

My face fell flat. “...You’re welcome.”

“Oh. Thanks, yeah, sorry.” He got his feet under himself and tried to stand, but almost fell over again. Iota grabbed his arm and let him brace against him. “Oh, hey, robot. Cool.”

“What happened?” Humi demanded. “What were you doing in the jungle?”

The snail looked at her, squinting like he couldn’t quite see her. “I’m searching for ingredients! There are so many different plants out here, there’s got to be something worth making into a drink! And I’m going to find it!”

I tilted my head. Making drinks… “Are you the bartender who went missing?”

He looked confused at that. “Missing? I’m not missing? I’ve been out here.”

“Did you tell anyone where you were going?”

He opened his mouth, then closed it again. “...Huh. Yeah, no, I don’t think I did. But I haven’t been gone that long?”

I pulled out my notebook to check. “...You were declared missing three weeks ago.”

“What? What’s the date?”

Iota rattled it off for him, and he turned pale. “Oh, heck. My paid time off ran out ages ago! I’m so fired…”

“Dude.” I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Why is that what you’re… Okay, hold on. What’s your name anyway?”

He held out his hand. “Name’s Shelldon.”

“Of course it is.” I accepted the handshake, and finally noticed that he was wearing long, elbow-length gloves. It squelched when I squeezed his hand.

Humi’s eyes were wide. “...Do you have bones?”

“Humi.”

Shelldon ignored my tone and looked at his hand. “I think so? I’ve never asked.”

“...I think he’s still drugged,” I said, turning to Iota. “He’s really out of it.”

“I am not drugged,” he insisted. “All I did was drink something I brewed out of this.”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a slightly squashed bushel of purple flowers.

Iota took the bundle and inspected it. “...Encyclopedia: Rhododendron. A wild variant of a popular commercial flower.”

“See? Perfectly safe. Found in flower shops everywhere. I knew that.”

“Rhododendrons produce a substance called grayanotoxin in their nectar. This toxin is persistent enough that bees that process the nectar create what is known as ‘mad honey,’ which can cause a variety of symptoms once consumed including dizziness, nausea, and fainting.”

Shelldon paused once the explanation concluded. “...Ah. Okay, so that was a bad call. Not good for drinks.”

“Right.” I cleared my throat. “I think you’ve had enough adventure. Let’s get you to the train station and--”

“Oh, no, no no no,” the snail said, waving his hands frantically. “I’m nowhere near ready to leave! I haven’t found what I’m looking for yet!”

I stared at him. I turned to someone else, hoping to be backed up, but Humi had gotten bored and gone back to her lunch, while Fry had left to get Shelldon a plate. At least Iota hadn’t moved.

“I understand the need to follow a passion,” Iota said. “But perhaps you should not be doing it alone.”

Yes, thank you Iota.

Shelldon considered that. “...Maybe.” He rubbed his chin, producing a distracting squeaking sound, then turned to me. “Do you mind if I set my camp up here?”

“What.”

“Well, your robot says he likes to wander around, I think I heard him say that, and frankly I need more people to try my drinks. What tastes good to me might not taste good to everyone, you know?” He said it matter-of-factly.

I gave up. I threw up my hands and went back to the table. “Sure. Sure, why not. Knock yourself out. Except don’t, you’ve already done that once.”

I sighed heavily. At least the food was good.

So now we’ve got a crazy drink mixer along with the breakfast truck. My, how the neighborhood grows. No, it was probably for the best. He’d just hurt himself again otherwise. At least this way he’d have someone to keep an eye on him.

As Shelldon took a seat of his own and thanked Fry for the plate, I looked around.

I suppose it was a little lonely out here before. At least things are never boring.

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[Gamma]

Unedited transcript of the Emerald Coast News interview

GR: …I never knew Sonic’s friends were so interesting!

Gamma: They are all big personalities, true. I hope that I can count myself among their number.

GR: I’m sure you can.

Gamma: Thank you.

GR: You told us about everyone else, are you sure you can’t tell us about this mysterious Heyu?

Gamma: …I suppose if I have to say anything… He takes hospitality very seriously. He cannot seem to stop helping people.