The set begins! The five opening shots.
Added 2024-11-30 01:53:22 +0000 UTCKayla and Breanna arrived at Yelena's royal residence. They've been brought to a waiting room where they have to kill some time. Not having seen anyone for a while, but also not having been summoned yet, Kayla begins to think the two ladies can distract themselves without anyone seeing.
Breanna's clearly keeping busy with selfies and social media, obsessed as she is with her own looks. But doesn't she just look perfectly fuckable? Kayla's not gonna let Breanna's narcissism stand in the way of a good time, but things might not turn out the way she expects!
Comments
Please try TheDude! And even if it doesn't work out in time, please let us know what your plan was.
TheGreatCornholio
2024-12-01 07:54:27 +0000 UTCAs much as I keep going on about them, I do also find comics not optimal. Shots get smaller, details can be missed unless you zoom in which affects the flow of going through the story, and there's a lot to work on when it comes to editing and adding the text I presume. I don't love them because they are comics, I love them because they come with a lot more narrative and direct dialogue. The more I think about it, the more I believe simple, linear VNs are the way to go. Present images as they are and you have the bottom bar for dialogue and narration. It's not 0 effort, but I think you can find a way to have a quick pipeline to make them, and it will be probably less then the time you take to edit and piece together comics.
TheGreatCornholio
2024-12-01 07:53:38 +0000 UTCSo my oldschool style is basically what you're seeing in these shots: implied dialogue, implied evolution of a scene. You read the bodylanguage and you can figure out what's happening. Eventually I started doing comics. I'm still not entirely happy with that format as a storytelling medium despite at this point having done quite a lot of them (and I'm not done doing them). For this story I was thinking exactly what you were saying: supplying text. I also said this in my reply to Eppy: I'm working on something to add a little more narrative punch. But no promises yet. If nothing else, the shots will be able to stand on their own two feet. But the coming week will have to prove whether or not I can deliver on the narrative front too for this set.
TheDude3DX
2024-12-01 03:52:34 +0000 UTCHaha, almost! I'm working on something to add a little more narrative punch to these shots. No promises yet.
TheDude3DX
2024-12-01 03:50:15 +0000 UTCBreanna looks like she's pissing off Kayla initially with her selfies like |"look at me in this big posh house" and Kayla is like "please spare me" lol. But then her sideways glance from beind her hair says someting like "well she's looking fit and sexy, we're on our own, a quick fuck out of the question"
Eppytaff
2024-11-30 11:18:11 +0000 UTCI see that Breanna is also sporting something more casual compared to the header. While it would have been nice to see all girls in something more elegant/formal/fancy, I'm happy you're giving both Kayla and Breanna something in the same category. It would have been jarring to see one walk in like she's ready for the club, and one like she's ready for a formal dinner :D. The is a nice start, I love how both girls look. Lol at the note about Breanna's self focus. I don't know how you plan to further develop Breanna, but having the exterior of a little vapid whore combined with a lot more intelligence than she lets on would work great for her imo. Mari is quite "soft", so she needs a partner to look out for her lol. Looking forward to more! <3 As a side note I have to say these shots look more ready for a comic, than for a set. I mean in the sense that some seem to be there to convey dialogue. I know you don't mean to turn this into a comic, but have you ever considered doing text/dialogue to support these kinds of sets? Just text at the bottom, no need for speech bubbles or things like that that requires editing. This will help you flex your writing muscles as well as let you pour some more context/story in these sets. I don't know how you envision this set, but as I've said before, I see it as the occasion where Kayla/Tatiana get approval from Yelena to bring Breanna into their plan. And of course use the occasion to lay down pipe :D.
TheGreatCornholio
2024-11-30 08:52:25 +0000 UTCWill try to do daily :)
TheDude3DX
2024-11-30 05:17:54 +0000 UTCBack to daily drops or as you're feelin the comin days ?
Anton Krstic
2024-11-30 03:51:31 +0000 UTCKayla looks seriously bored and annoyed! Lol
Samsungnote007
2024-11-30 02:48:20 +0000 UTC
