I've begun to finalize the story, finally getting a "vomit pass" in so that I can look at everything now thats it fully written down on a sheet paper.
Without offering too many spoilers, my biggest critique is to deliver more on the fantasy aspect during the fun n games section of the story. There's a lot of talking, not a lot of doing.
While I re-write the re-vision, I've started sketching up rough pages to start zeroing in on the style goal. It's funny, I was showing my boyfriend everything I've worked on for this project and he said "Wow you've been in a lot of work into this huh?"