How Do Other People's Kinks Affect Your Daily Life Exactly?

There is only one submissive role that won’t get you shamed in the kink community: the altruistic, 100% obedient sub. In BDSM, we've got no room for human fallibility. Community mores state that thou shalt not be a brat. Thou shalt not be a service top. Thou shalt not be a sub who struggles with submission.

Please alter your  personality to suit the website’s judgement panel because there’s no reason they should have to tolerate your relationship with your partner day in and day out. They think about your poly furries family for at least a second a day. Their lives will be profoundly affected by that unsubmissive glitter bomb you planted behind your boyfriend’s steering wheel this morning, and that shit gets everywhere. For godsakes, stop being so selfish by handling your relationships your way.

Back in the Nineties,  right wing pundits claimed that gay marriage threatened the institution of marriage. We’ve evolved a lot since then. These days, we know traditional gender roles aren’t worth the bibles they were printed in, and yet, right here in the kink community, we’re making a similar claim every day: That other people’s kinks threaten our own BDSM experience.

The reasoning isidentical. Kink-shamers claim that unsubly subs are destroying everything the BDSM community stands for, that they’re a *bad influence* on “purer” partnerships. That if subs start behaving like individuals, it will be harder to find the perfect partner.

How does someone else’s kink threaten your D/s relationship? Has your partnership been put under undue strain as a result of the little and daddy dom down the road? Is your sub being less obedient because cK keeps bratting Solo? Have you lost credibility as a dominant because the bottom two oceans away from you only has relationships with service tops? Has the kajira who went to the munch the other day changed the way your BDSM community functions?

I thought not.

The times, they are a’changing. We've managed to find our way into the 21st century, and in this day and age, people celebrate their uniqueness. I can guarantee you don’t fit exactly into Twuist concepts of D/s either, so please feel free to join us in 2023 at any point.