Pokearworm 3 - Re-released!

I said I’d have something and here it is!

For context (and minor spoilers):

Bruno - Midday Lycanroc

Charlie - Absol

Damos - Houndoom

Elric - Manectric

Garmr - Alpha-sized Hisuian Arcanine

000

“Whiskers..”

“Yep. I see it.” Whiskers dragged his hand down his face. “At least we’re still bipeds.”

“Small miracles.” Thalia harrumphed. She watched her boyfriend approach his mismatched pack.

“Bruno?”

An orange and cream colored dog moved forward. He barked a species name and sat, awaiting instructions.

“Good boy, Bruny.” Thalia praised, kneeling down and scratching the coarse coat. She hummed. “Gonna have to be careful with that spike though.”

“Charlie.” Whiskers sounded off.

The next to spring forward was an energetic white and blue-faced dog with a sickle on the side of its head.

“Sol! Absol!”

“Okay, okay. Down girl.” Whiskers scratched her head, careful of the new protrusion. “Let’s see…Damos?”

The horned dog with an orange snoot borked. He immediately started cleaning himself.

“Yep. That’s Damos.” Thalia deadpanned.

“This must be Elric.” Whiskers mused as a blue and yellow short hound trotted forward. It rubbed against his leg and he patted its head. “Good to see you too.”

“So then where is Garm?” Thalia asked.

A ground shaking beast landed, easily twice their height. They peered up at him.

“Is that an Arcanine?” Whiskers furrowed his brow.

“I think so…weird head, though.” Thalia mused. “Reminds me of those Chinese lions.”

“Weird, no Poochyena or Mightyena.” Whiskers muttered, scratching his chin.

“That’s because you fill that slot, Whiskers.” Thali smirked as she gave Elric and Damos their deserved pats.

“That might explain why we don’t have any Eevee or Jolteon then,” Whiskers shot back dryly. He opened his mouth to say more when his eye caught something behind her. His jaw dropped. Thalia arched a brow and turned.

She stilled.

A Raikou stared down at her from where it was perched.

“That…is blatantly favoritism.” Whiskers huffed.

000

“You were saying about favoritism?” Thalia smirked a while later as her boyfriend was used as a makeshift bed by a crystal blue canid with a flowing purple mane.

“Not one more word out of you, Tree Girl. Not. One.”

000

“So in this timeline, we didn’t meet Ketchup-“

“Ketchum.” Whiskers corrected as he brushed Suicune’s mane. Much to Charlie’s clearly jealous ire, as she glowered at the aloof Pokemon Legendary that claimed him as her ‘trainer’. Thalia rolled her eyes and gave Raikou another pat on the side so he’d shuffle up and make a better pillow to lean on.

“Whatever. We didn’t meet the kid. Clearly.” Thalia looked at her arm, not as toned, tattooed or as long as she was used to it being. “And we’re, what, inhabiting our duplicates’ bodies?”

“Could be a botched reincarnation.” Whiskers offered with a shrug. He was once more officially older than her, at fourteen to her twelve. Lucky bastard. “Or an illusionary trap.”

“Why would anyone make this as a trap? There’s living monsters that work WITH people here.” Thalia argued.

“I don’t know, Thalia. Maybe they’re fans of the show?” Whiskers sighed. He set the brush down and gave Suicune a gentle pat. “All set. Nex-?”

Charlie nearly bowled the Legendary over to get her turn under Whiskers brush. Thalia snorted.

“I think Charlie wants to go next.”

“No, really?” Whiskers deadpanned. “What gave it away?”

000

“…What’s Ho-enn?” Thalia asked, squinting at the sign. They finally decided to abandon the weird shack they had woken in with The Pack and two Legendary Beasts nearby.

“Pretty sure it’s another name for Aphrodite.” Whiskers deadpanned. He crossed his arms before one reached out and traced the map. “So we’re here, southeast of Petalburg…which means…Littleroot, is the closest. I think?”

“Your ability to read maps fills me with so much confidence.”

“Well, there is the giant volcanic landmark I'm using as a reference to determine our location.” Whiskers shot back. Thalia opened her mouth to retaliate when a bush rustled nearby. Lo and behold, a small pack of Poochyena tumbled out, snarling at one another. The smallest of the bunch squirmed away from the louder group and ducked around Whiskers’ ankles. It looked up at her boyfriend and whined pleadingly, pawing up at his knee.

“…Guess you’re still King of Wolves, Whiskers. Can’t wait to tell Annie about this one.”

“You’re a regular comedian, Tree Girl. Don’t quit your day job.” He deadpanned back as he knelt down and scratched the literal wild animal’s neck. “What’s the issue-…Okay, new development.”

“What?” Thalia asked. The pooch whine-barked when Whiskers looked away and she scowled at it. “Hey, don’t get snippy by losing his attention.”

“She said, getting snippy as she lost his attention.”

“I will have Raikou shock you, don’t think I won’t.”

000

“Oh,” a spectacled boy in a green polo blinked as he opened the door. “Mom! Dad! There’s another new challenger here!”

“Actually, we’re just hoping to find somebody and confirm a theory of ours.” Whiskers explained, his arms crossed. He sniffed and peered around into the house. “Something is burning.”

“Torchic, no! You can’t reheat your own food on my clothes!” A girl cried out from within.

“Huh, good nose.” The boy blinked. He looked up at them. “So, if you’re not here to challenge my dad, who are you looking for?”

“…challenge his-Gym Leader. Right.” Thalia shook the confusion off and smiled at him. “Look, kid, we’re just looking for some twerp and his Pikachu-“

“Twerp-? Team Rocket!” A scratchy voiced prepubescent cried out. The young kid was pulled back and Ash Ketchum in some kind of hoodie pointed at them. “Pikachu, Thunderbolt!”

“…Tree Girl, absorb.” Whiskers said just as the mouse let off a bolt of lightning. Thalia casually redirected it into the dirt and gave him a scowl. He shrugged. “What? It’s funny.”

“You know what, next time I’m letting Raikou CHAR you.”

“Nah,” Whiskers smiled as he hugged her. “You like me raw.”

“…Pikachu, use a thunderbolt. Please!” The young kid plead with a gag while Ash stared at them. Dumbfounded.

000

“Weird, I could’ve sworn we were outside the Petalburg Gym.” Thalia frowned as she and Whiskers looked around the snowy new land. A bell of laughter had her look up. She arched a brow. “…Whiskers?”

“Yeah, I see it.” He nodded in her peripherals.

“That’s an Onion Fairy.”

Rude!! The little fairy flew into Whiskers’ face. I’m Celebi! The Time Legendary!

“…Oh gods dammit.” The couple groaned in unison.

Language. Celebi chided. Now, my telepathy isn’t that strong and my time here is limited. Update? You’re in Sinnoh, two years from when you were in Hoenn.

“Oh, so that’s how you say it.” Whiskers muttered.

000

“…Is…are those Squirtle?”

“I believe they are.” Whiskers nodded. He scratched Bruno’s ear as they sat in the stands of a contest hall and went back to reading. A quintet of Squirtle were performing a series of over the top poses before Withdrawing and Shell Smashing, revealing themselves in new colored costumes.

“Huh, says here in this ‘Pokémon for Beginners’ book that Squirtle are notoriously strange,” Whiskers mused as he flipped the page. “Oh, it says here that they’re otaku.”

“They’re what?”

“Big on Japanese culture.”

“…They are Japanese culture.” Thalia deadpanned.

“Well, Tree Girl, I don’t think that they know that.”