It is my birthday!
Added 2024-06-14 13:00:12 +0000 UTC(Don't worry, there will still be the weekly strip at 10am Pacific today, and the bloopers strip at noon)
Some people are like, "Oh, I don't make a big deal out of my birthday. I don't want anything. I don't even tell people it's my birthday. It's not a big deal."
I am like, "In this landscape of expanding alienation, I am going to let people know that it actually feels nice when people use their excuse to say, 'Hi, thanks for doing what you do, glad you made it another year, because we've all been losing people who don't get another year, and, anyway, yeah, I know about you and I think you're swell.'"
If you want to get me a present, please subscribe to the Achewood Patreon, or consider upgrading your tier for a month! That way, we both get a present, which was the original promise of capitalism (?).
There are dozens of hours of top-notch folly in there at this point, and I promise you'll enjoy it much more than the equivalent five dollars' worth of leathery leftover pizza you're finally going to throw away on Monday. I mean, you didn't even close the foil all the way around it, and the mushrooms have these hideous crenulations on them now.
It is my birthday! I will see you in line at Lauretta Jean's pie counter on Division, if I am lucky enough to get to go there. Lauren has some kind of surprise cooked up.
Comments
Happy birthday! Odds are pretty good I never forget when yours is now, since it's apparently the day before my brother's. Spooky, almost birthday brothers, only just missed it
RaleighTSakers
2024-06-18 21:23:57 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday.
Alexander Rediger
2024-06-17 11:38:13 +0000 UTCHappy birthday! Thanks for the reminder about Lauretta Jean’s — headed there now for an early Father’s Day celebration
Sad Bros
2024-06-15 20:58:44 +0000 UTCHappy birthday!
Benjamin Seitelman
2024-06-15 19:36:25 +0000 UTCPlease let us know if you are joining the Great Outdoor Fight this year!
Brad Matheson
2024-06-15 19:30:03 +0000 UTCHappy late bdayyy!
Brad Matheson
2024-06-15 19:28:55 +0000 UTCHappy birthday, Onstad! Thank you for permanently altering my sense of humor and cadence of speech.
Dalton Reyburn
2024-06-15 18:46:14 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday!! I hope you bought a pepper plant, pepper plants are the best.
Ruxine
2024-06-15 03:29:14 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday! Thanks for all the chuckles, including the rough ones.
2scrogz
2024-06-14 23:36:20 +0000 UTCHappy birthday! You sure make us happy.
blair
2024-06-14 22:19:55 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday Man! I hope you get to do something cool today. Also, I'm a firm believer in Birthday pie!
C C
2024-06-14 21:50:57 +0000 UTCHap birf!
NotAnon
2024-06-14 21:47:43 +0000 UTCHappy birthday, sir. Thank you for everything so far and everything to come. For your special day, have you considered: manes? (This idea prompted by Lennon McAuliffe's userpic further up the thread with maned Beef.)
John Robinson
2024-06-14 20:28:31 +0000 UTCOh, I'll be stealing that. (Because it's amazing.)
John Robinson
2024-06-14 20:19:05 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday!
Jonathan
2024-06-14 20:14:49 +0000 UTCHappy birthday to the guy of vocabulary who has provided us with such mirth over the... decades 🫡
Formica
2024-06-14 20:03:50 +0000 UTCi think you are swell!
Brian Wakefield
2024-06-14 19:49:20 +0000 UTCHappy birthday, captain!
Andy Jennings
2024-06-14 19:37:10 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday Chris
Tom PM
2024-06-14 19:22:05 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday Chris! I grabbed that Nate Small download for the occasion (was going to anyway, it's one of my favorite things). Anyway as Alec Guinness said to Peter O'Toole, "what I owe you is beyond evaluation."
Mark Larkin
2024-06-14 19:15:05 +0000 UTCHappy birthday! Garden centers are underrated destinations for fun.
Ryan Boyle
2024-06-14 19:04:29 +0000 UTCHBD you old salty fuck. And thanks for the fish.
Rob Dalton
2024-06-14 18:42:52 +0000 UTCHappy birthday, Chris!
Gregory Sheets
2024-06-14 18:25:16 +0000 UTCGood job on the orbit!
Lionstooth
2024-06-14 18:12:43 +0000 UTCHappy birthday!!! Hope you have an amazing and thank you for everything!
Steven Guerrero
2024-06-14 18:05:23 +0000 UTCHappy birthday Chris. I hope you got the best feature plant.
Cymbaline
2024-06-14 18:04:44 +0000 UTChappy birthday!
Joshua Ruddy
2024-06-14 17:59:39 +0000 UTCHey man, I'm glad you exist, try to keep it up if possible
kdusjjdhxksj
2024-06-14 17:53:07 +0000 UTCChris, me love you long time.
Andrew Derho
2024-06-14 17:17:47 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday, You!
Dawson Smith
2024-06-14 17:15:01 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday!!! Thank you for being rad and making rad stuff!!!
Travis O.
2024-06-14 17:10:49 +0000 UTCFor your special day I promise not to do cocaine at you. Happy birthday!
b.zap
2024-06-14 17:01:59 +0000 UTCkeep on being corporeal ya beautiful bastard
s b
2024-06-14 16:46:53 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday Chris. It's been a wild ride. I'm grateful for all of the warmth, humor, beauty, and also malaise, fear, and loneliness you've shared with us over the years. Having Achewood ride shotgun through my adulthood has been an irreplaceable gift.
Ben Wilinofsky
2024-06-14 16:41:29 +0000 UTCHappy birthday, Chris! Every year, I get a kick out of it when I'm reminded you have the same birthday as my dad. But something tells me that, unlike him, you're not celebrating your 70th today! (But if you are, might I say that you're looking fantastic! 😉)
Jacquelyn R Walters
2024-06-14 16:32:47 +0000 UTCWell, happy birthday. I might see ya there since it's right around the corner and it was my birthday this week too... Also check out the new Wellsprung market next door. It's a nice addition to the block.
Michael G.
2024-06-14 16:15:27 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday to one of my favorite people in the world! I hope you have a wonderful day 🎂
Ismini Roller
2024-06-14 16:06:42 +0000 UTCHuuuuuugs!
Amy Lewis
2024-06-14 16:01:15 +0000 UTCHappy birthday you old sonofabitch, I hope it's fantastic. Thank you for 20+ years of the most formative comedy to who I am now
Tobias Sumrall
2024-06-14 15:49:41 +0000 UTCHappy birthday, dogg!
Kewkoh
2024-06-14 15:44:24 +0000 UTC🎂
Lennon McAuliffe
2024-06-14 15:42:49 +0000 UTCHappy Onstadday
Matthew Harris
2024-06-14 15:39:51 +0000 UTCPenblwydd hapus!
Steffan Thomas
2024-06-14 15:33:37 +0000 UTCHi, thanks for doing what you do, glad you made it another year, because we've all been losing people who don't get another year, and, anyway, yeah, I know about you and I think you're swell.
Carl Johnson
2024-06-14 15:20:53 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday Onstad, yours is the day after mine so I never forget it anyway yeah I know about you and I think you're swell
Bob Kasenchak
2024-06-14 15:09:58 +0000 UTChappy bday big dog your work has had a very good and personal impact on me and i look forward to every friday a little more now that it’s back. also hype about the book
Cy Heffley
2024-06-14 14:59:04 +0000 UTCHey man. I know about you! And I think you're swell.
Miles Crawford
2024-06-14 14:46:32 +0000 UTCHappy birthday, Chris! And thank you for the bringing of the best comedy of the last twenty years.
Dan W
2024-06-14 14:44:58 +0000 UTCFrom one Chris to another, happy birthday. Have a /good/ day dude.
Chris
2024-06-14 14:43:03 +0000 UTCHappy birthday Onstad. I was bidding on eBay for this Jane's Addiction shirt for you. I got outbid but at least I did try. No, but really: Happy, happy birthday and happy, happy existence. I can't overstate how influential your writing has been on my own, and how you've helped me widen my thinking about the possibilities of language, narrative and just, like, life. You've been making the world better for all of us, for (anyone here under age 46) at least half our lives now, and you are so appreciated.
Oppido
2024-06-14 14:39:43 +0000 UTCYou gave me pause with the truth.
Julie (HiDeeHoGal)
2024-06-14 14:39:10 +0000 UTCHappy birthday! Agreed, a small (or big) celebration of making it through yet another year in these uncertain times is warranted. It is a sort of personal New Year's Day. I just had my 50th and while there was no party, I definitely treated myself. So enjoy your surprise.
Julie (HiDeeHoGal)
2024-06-14 14:37:06 +0000 UTCHappy birthday!
AbandonedRocketship
2024-06-14 14:31:45 +0000 UTCHappy birthday Chris! I've been reading since the Assetbar days, thank you for everything over the years-- I hope you have a wonderful year!!
Brian Slattery
2024-06-14 14:31:28 +0000 UTCOnstad, your nativity is on my calendar of saints
Chadwick Crawford
2024-06-14 14:29:36 +0000 UTCHBD Chris! The Achewood crew popping up is always a bright spot in my week, and I’m grateful for everything you do
John Petroff
2024-06-14 14:24:58 +0000 UTCHappy birthday Chris! You brighten my day a little every time I encounter a Stella Artois, a rib-eye steak, some rough chuckles, or so many other things. Hope you have a wonderful year.
J M
2024-06-14 14:09:35 +0000 UTCHappy birthday! Thanks for doing what you do, but also just existing too.
Liz
2024-06-14 14:09:14 +0000 UTCHappy birthday!
Michael Cadger
2024-06-14 14:05:19 +0000 UTCCongrats on whatever age you have hit. Remember: Old and young - we are all on our final voyage. [Paraphrasing from novelist and poet Robert Louis Stevenson.]
Walter Cooke
2024-06-14 14:00:29 +0000 UTCHappy birthday!
Chase Macri
2024-06-14 13:58:31 +0000 UTCHappy birthday fellow gemini! Thank you very much for the years of joy you've brought to me and thousands of others!
M. J.
2024-06-14 13:51:12 +0000 UTCwe all have our projections from our true form into this often disappointing material plane congratulations on carrying it through another year inside your meat prison the "thank you teodor you can stay" representation of onstad is far closer to what i mean when i say true form
Zen Window
2024-06-14 13:50:24 +0000 UTChappy birthday ya little scamp
Yelahneb Unicornucopiax
2024-06-14 13:49:58 +0000 UTCHappy birthday! I found Achewood thanks to Songfight, when MC Hawking won the competition of August 18, 2003, with his rendition of "What We Need More of Is Science": https://www.songfight.org/songpage.php?key=morescience I swiftly went through the not quite two years of archives and have champed at the bit for each new strip ever since. Thank you for all these years of Achewood.
Charles Richter
2024-06-14 13:47:47 +0000 UTCHappy birthday and thanks for more than 20 years of momentary distractions on the long road to the grave.
A. Christopher Bowling
2024-06-14 13:39:29 +0000 UTCHappy birthday and thank you!
Jay Lawng
2024-06-14 13:34:25 +0000 UTCHappy birthday, my dude. Your e-content shaped a lot of my social group's in-jokes for decades. Hope you're like, havin' a good one. 🍻
awful_falafel
2024-06-14 13:27:33 +0000 UTCHAPPY BIRTHDAY!
trashdo
2024-06-14 13:18:21 +0000 UTCHey happy birthday, brochacho. Glad you made it another year
Spyguitar
2024-06-14 13:18:21 +0000 UTCHappy Birthday!
MangoIsOrange
2024-06-14 13:16:55 +0000 UTCHappy birthday! I’m glad you exist and continue to exist. Your work brings joy to my life and has done for many many years. Hope you’re around for years to come.
Nikita Fedorov
2024-06-14 13:13:57 +0000 UTCHappy birthday Chris. Hope it's a fine one
J Hardy Carroll
2024-06-14 13:12:37 +0000 UTCHappy birthday Mr. Onstad! I hope for you the wisdom and perspective of an old English bear and the resilience and exuberance of an otter who is always 5. Glad to have you and the gang back
Kevin VanEvery
2024-06-14 13:09:09 +0000 UTCHappy birthday. And thanks, man. You are great, and this is great.
Shepton
2024-06-14 13:08:02 +0000 UTCHi, thanks for doing what you do, glad you made it another year, because we've all been losing people who don't get another year, and, anyway, yeah, I know about you and I think you're swell. seriously though, happy birthday! I'm really happy that I get to experience your art again. it was a really memorable part of my life two decades ago, and I'm tickled that it gets to be now as well.
pieps
2024-06-14 13:06:23 +0000 UTCHappy birthday fellow June baby!
Max Kreisky
2024-06-14 13:06:16 +0000 UTCHi, thanks for doing what you do, glad you made it another year, because we've all been losing people who don't get another year, and, anyway, yeah, I know about you and I think you're swell.
Anthony Thompson
2024-06-14 13:04:11 +0000 UTCA very happy birthday to the Man Himself!
Billy Keenly
2024-06-14 13:03:36 +0000 UTC
