Tales From Asheville 3

“Yeah we decided to start potty training her. We’re not sure how well she’ll do, but we’re optimistic! She’s told us she wants to use the potty instead of her diapers for a weeks now. The doctor said we need to build on that positive attitude.” Trish said to her friend Elizabeth. Elizabeth nodded her head while taking a sip from her coffee mug. She exhaled after placing the cup back down on her kitchen table.

“That’s fantastic, I know she’s been somewhat of a ‘late bloomer’ for her age, but that’s fine! She’ll get the hang of it I’m sure. You two are great parents.” Elizabeth said, while shifting the weight in her chair. She seemed genuinely excited for Trish that her daughter was finally taking the steps toward potty training. Trish smiled and took a sip from her own coffee mug.

“Thank you, Liz. I really appreciate that.” She said, before putting the mug back down. “Oh.” Trish thought, feeling a ping in her bladder alert the need to relieve itself. Trish looked up at Elizabeth, “All of this talk of potty training is making me need to go! Haha. I’ll probably head out when I come back.” She said, the two shared a moment of giggles.

“No problem, you know where it is.” Elizabeth said, pointing down the hall. Trish’s chair scraped across the kitchen floor. She stood up, and began walking down the same hall Elizabeth just pointed down.

That’s all it took. Whirling. Lights. The device. Pop.

“Huh?” Trish said, suddenly stopping in the doorway. She peered cautiously into the small bathroom. Her mind felt lost. What was this room for? Why did she feel the need to walk in here?

“Where am I?” Trish though, wondering what purpose this room served. She felt the presence of Elizabeth behind her.

“Whatcha doing over here, Sweetie?” Elizabeth asked in a sweet tone. Trish turned around, feeling disoriented and lost.

“I… I don’t know.” She said, meekly. She subconsciously bit her lip and looked down at her feet.

“You don’t need to go over here, remember? You said you were going to start your diaper training? We were just talking about it!” Elizabeth said happily, trying to cheer Trish up. It was then that Trish noticed the bulging white underwear around her waist. She didn’t even realize it was there when she looked down at her feet. It felt too common to focus on in the first place.

“Did we? I thought we were talking about…. Um… Potty training?” Trish said. Her mind strained to recall the last 5 minutes. She was talking to her Mommy about potty training, and the fact she wasn’t optimistic about ever making it to the potty, so she should just get used to diapers? Was that it? The more she tried thinking about it, the more confused she was.

Her mind hung on that last phrase. ‘Potty Training.’ What was that? Trish could feel there used to be a space in her mind for that knowledge, but it was gone. What was the act of training yourself to potty? Didn’t Trish just go in her pants when she had to potty? How was she supposed to keep track of that in the first place?

“No, no. Trishy, we were talking about how you’ll do fine diaper training for your age! You’re a late bloomer, but that doesn’t mean you can’t start soaking your diaper for Mommy.” Elizabeth said, cupping her hand on the front of Trish’s diaper. “See, you’re already on your way!” Elizabeth said in a proud tone.

“What?” Trish said, looking back down at her diaper. She saw the bottom of her diaper discoloring and beginning to sag. It was then she registered the faintest feeling of her bladder releasing itself. It all happened so fast, and without warning. Trish couldn’t have stopped the accident if she tried. Stopping the flow into her diaper made zero sense to Trish. Was there ever a time she didn’t just soak herself? That’s what she wore diapers for.

Instead of looking like an idiot in front of her Mommy, she decided to just accept the situation and move on. She tried playing the situation off cool. “Oh yeah, you’re right, duh!” Trish said, before she decided to walk away from the bathroom.

Her mind was doing it’s best to get out of this embarrassing situation. She recalled her previous conversation with Elizabeth before she got to the bathroom. She stopped walking once she was back in the kitchen and looked back at Elizabeth.

“I’m gonna leave now! See ya later.” Trish said, turning toward the front door. She was content with the outfit she had on at the moment to leave Elizabeth’s. Her still warm diaper squelched as she made her way to the exit. Warm beads of pee tickled Trish’s inner thighs from the sides of her mushy diaper. Elizabeth didn’t stop her.

“Alright, have fun outside, Trishy!” Elizabeth said with a motherly tone. She smiled, knowing that Trish wasn’t going to make it very far from the house.

The warm sun greeted Trish’s skin as she flung open the door. She placed two proud hands on her diapered hips. She felt like life was finally back to normal. With a triumphant exhale, she placed her bare feet on the hot steps. She walked down the steps, and through the grassy front lawn.

“Dumb Mommy. Thinks I can’t be a big kid and use my diapers.” Trish said, her mind spinning up strange sentences to babble to herself. “Me gonna drive to da big kid store and show her that I can not buy diapers.” Trish muttered. Her brain felt soft. Ideas formed and rolled at the back of her skull. Nothing stuck. Any train of thought left the station into a warm misty bliss, never to be seen again.

Trish placed her hand on the red plastic door. It felt hot from laying out in the sun all day. Her hand pulled open the door, and she immediately crammed herself into the tiny one seat car. The yellow plastic frame of the “windshield” connected to the roof above. Trish looked down at the steering wheel. The words were hard to read, but she eventually sounded out “Li-tt-al T-i-k-es.” A common car brand for someone Trish’s mental age.

She looked down at the floor and was surprised to see the ground instead of foot pedals. Trish shrugged, reasoning that she must have bought the cheap model. Her feet started pushing off the hot pavement of the driveway, lurching her car forward. Her hands gripped the steering wheel. She tried in vein to steer the car’s wheels and instead started aimlessly driving around.

Trish had an absolute blast playing with her toy car. She couldn’t help herself when she fell into a giggle attack time and time again. Each rush of the car moving forward felt like it was moving hundreds of miles per hour in Trish’s mind. The thrilling acceleration of moving 5 feet forward. It produced a rush of adrenaline like she’d never experienced before.

The thrill made it impossible for Trish to keep tabs on her diaper usage. Even if she wanted to, she couldn’t tell that she was dribbling out warm pee into her drooping diaper. Each push of her feet caused another cascade of dribbles to flow into the saturated padding. Trish didn’t even register the streaks of pee that were spill out from the sides and back of her thoroughly soaked diaper. To her, the warm puddle of pee that was sloshing around her seat was part of the ride.

It felt like Trish was out there for almost the entire day. Spinning and rolling around in her toy car. It caught Trish completely off guard when she felt her momentum suddenly stop. It caused a surprised rush of pee to eek out and fill the puddle around her.

“Looks like someone is having a lot of fun out here! You need a change for sure. Look at how wet you are! Who’s a pee pee girl? Who’s a wet pee pee girl?” Elizabeth said in a motherly singsong voice. Trish was helpless at the bubbles of happy giggles that uttered out of her mouth. Mommy was saying funny things!

“Meee!!!” Trish giggled back, letting her Mommy open the door and pull her out of the door.

“Oof! We’re gonna have to get you thicker diapers, huh? You made an ocean in your car!” Elizabeth said, pulling Trish up and resting the diaper girl on her hip. Trish blushed and nodded. Her thumb snaked it’s way into her mouth. A cascade of calm started tumbling through her relaxing body.

Trish’s mind didn’t fight it when she was laid down for a diaper change minutes later. It didn’t even fight it for a nap afterwards. And it especially didn’t put up a fight when Elizabeth breast fed after she woke up. In fact, it never fought anything ever again. Her Mommy took care of boring stupid thoughts like that for her. That’s how it always was, and always would be for Trish.