heatherbeck

Letters From Heather - 2022 - Bought It For The Bathroom

Added 2021-04-11 05:15:39 +0000 UTC

(The next in a series of vignettes about alternate reality Heather, whose boobs never stopped growing. Illustration by the fabulous @aldoinheaven [on Twitter and Insta].)

I think I definitely bought it for the bathroom. The view is still a little whamp-whamp, but it’s a few floors off the ground, and the layout is really solid and modular. My first big-girl purchase with the last couple of royalty checks.

But that bathroom, though. I think three people could lay down in that crazy garden tub (or at least one whole Heather), and (achievement unlocked) I finally have achieved my dream of having a huge walk-in shower with a rainfall showerhead. I get so grumpy throughout the day if I skip rinsing off in the morning.

It still feels wonderful, even after a couple of weeks living here. Gentle hot water cascading straight down, dripping onto my toes from the terminus of my chest; long after the hair is washed and the soap has been cleared from all the underboob, it’s the kinda shower where you just want to stand around in, swaying side-to-side, humming whatever is playing on the Spotify.