NASA (Again)

A lot of you folks will recognize this video, which oddly enough, was (I think) my "greatest hit" on Instagram (last time I checked, I think it had like, 150,000 views or something, which is a little baffling? But, you know. Boobs.). So I apologize for the redundancy.

Thing is, when I logged into Instagram recently, I was given a big full-page message that informed me that this video (which has been up for more than a year, and was one of my first postings) had been taken down because it violated Instagram's Terms of Service. Seriously? The only thing I can figure is that "underboob" falls under "nipples." I've ranted in the past. I shan't do it again.

I haven't even tried to contest it, because you know what? Instagram don't deserve mah boobies! You know who does deserve mah boobies? You guys. So I'm not gonna re-post it over there, because they can just eat so many grapes that they get a stomach ache (OHHH, Aw, No she didn't!!!1!!). 

But I will post it here, where it shall live in infamy, for all of you. 

And I post it on a historic day. Yeah, I know the moon landing was 4 days ago, and I missed that (moon)shot. But! Today is the 50th anniversary of the day when the last part of Kennedy's Rice University speech was fulfilled: "...and return them safely to the earth," when the capsule splashed down safely in the ocean. 

Did you know that the astronauts had to be kept in quarantine after they returned, just in case they brought back any weird space bugs with them? Also, did you know that there are — scattered across the moon's surface to this day — bags of astronaut poop? And, that scientists want to study that astronaut poop for science reasons, but nobody has any idea of how to get close enough to retrieve them without unsettling sites of long-term historic interest? (Ain't no wind on the moon, so the footprints and buggy tracks are still there, undisturbed). 

And, so it remains intact (like a much-less-important version of footprints and buggy tracks), here's the caption that went along with the original post before it was removed by the Almighty Algorithm:

"Right now, less than a half a penny of each tax dollar we spend goes to NASA. Not only does investment in space exploration yield a substantial return on investment in the form of economic growth, but some of the modern era's great achievements have been made possible because of the space program: LEDs, artificial limbs, temporary artificial hearts, anti-icing systems, vast improvements in highway safety, advancements in chemical detection, video enhancing systems, landmine removal, firefighter gear, Posturepedic mattresses, enhanced nutrition for children, free drying technology, cordless vacuums, solar energy panels, pollution remediation, water purification, food safety, gyroscopes, weather monitoring. Also, a global network of intercommunicating satellites, meaning that the device you're reading this on right now isn't just a fancy thousand-dollar brick. Space exploration is a novelty for the super-rich, nor is it a purely academic exercise. Investing in our national space program yields real results, in countless ways, for people across the world, and continues creating jobs for decades after the initial investment. Plus, it inspires people, dammit, and we need more of that these days. Write your congressperson, and le's jack this up to a penny per dollar."

I think I wrote that after watching an episode of Real Time with Bill Maher. I generally like the dude — he's laid back, smokes weed like a chimney, and even though he solidly falls into the group of "Grumpy Liberal Baby Boomer," he hits the nail on the head most of the time. Still, he's (as I'm sure many of you might be, and that's cool, no judgement here) fervently anti-space exploration because "we have problems here that need to be fixed!". I just can't get on board with that argument. We can fix problems here as well, and the space program can help, ya' grumbly ol' goon. 

If, by any chance Bill is one of my subscribers... Hi Bill! Can you hook a girl up on some primo kush? That'd be super-cool.