8) 4 Reasons Why People Don’t Respect You.

Please do not take this as an attack on your character. This post is a self-improvement guide.

Before I start:

Realise it's a GAME people play. 

The game of SOCIAL STATUS.

Remember that 98% of the world is NOT LIKE YOU. 

Others are looking to put people DOWN and establish themselves as having HIGH status.

Trying to CONTROL and MANIPULATE you.

Basically, all the shit people do in middle school, are MOST ADULTS IN THE WORLD.

Pretty sad right?

But you have to be able to SEE the game people are PLAYING.

So use this as a PROTECTION against the dirty tricks of OTHER people.

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1. You don't set Boundaries

Do you OFTEN let things slide?

Now, this may be a GOOD trait to have as you never take things PERSONALLY.

But in the eyes of OTHER people, they may see you as SOFT.

How?

A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.

Individuals who lack appropriate boundaries often struggle with telling others how they feel for fear of rejection or ridicule.

However, it's crucial since boundaries are meant to safeguard your emotional well-being. 

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If someone insults you in front of others and you do not set a CLEAR LINE, then they will repeat it.

Making you look inferior.

Now in NO way am I suggesting you become a CRUEL person, but,

"Be careful of what you tolerate. You’re teaching them how to treat you.”

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If you're not used to setting boundaries, it can be CHALLENGING. 

You’ll probably be ASHAMED and AFRAID when you set boundaries.

Be prepared to FOLLOW THROUGH by ACTING with the boundaries you set.

If you say I will cut you off and they continue, CUT them off.

• “Stop doing that . . . or I’ll leave; report you; (etc.).”
• “I won’t be disrespected - If you won’t respect me, then stay away.”

You’ll be TESTED when you set boundaries.

Some people are happy to RESPECT your boundaries

It takes communication to establish boundaries. 

Don't ever fall into the TRAP of going into GREAT DETAIL of what will happen.

Just SET your line CLEARLY and concisely.

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2. You appear weak.

People don't respect people they believe are weak.

This is not your PHYSICAL appearance.

You do NOT need to be a bodybuilder to earn respect.

Instead, it is the way YOU carry YOURSELF.

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For example:

People interrupt you and you’re okay with it.

It’s normal in conversations for people to be interrupted and most of them aren't intended. 

But if it happens to you more often and you seem to be OKAY with it, you are allowing them to portray you as WEAK.

Even if you feel you’re being COURTEOUS, you should know when to draw the LINE.

When you allow people to interrupt you, you let them think that it’s okay to talk over you and that your opinions don’t really matter.

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The next time someone interrupts you, it's important that you let them know that you want to be heard.

Saying things such as “Hang on, please let me speak”, or “Excuse me, I’d like to finish what I was saying” can help. 

DO NOT increase the tone of your voice trying to get the attention drawn back to you. 

This is a weak way.

If in case you don’t get the chance to finish what you want to say, it’s okay.

What matters is that you let people know that you have something to say, so that later on, they will give you the chance to speak up.

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I know a friend who is 5 foot 2.

A full-grown man who seems very SMALL in front of total strangers. 

Weak target, right? 

NOT AT ALL.

If anybody ever said anything inaccurate in his presence he immediately calls them out. 

Doesn't matter how BIG they are or what they LOOK like. 

Everyone respects this man.

You have to EXHIBIT strength, power, and social energy.

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3. You say YES to everything.

How many times have you said YES to OTHERS and felt GUILTY about it later on?

You said YES knowing WELL ENOUGH you can't.

But you still did it anyways, why?

You don't want to HURT the heart of others.

You're concerned about how other people PERCEIVE you. 

You want to be liked, loved, and accepted.

In other words, you're a people pleaser.

Learn to say NO.

The day you learn to say “No” will be the beginning of a HAPPIER life.

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You have to realise that saying yes to others when you shouldn't, is actually you saying no to something for yourself.

That's why you hear me say:

PUT YOURSELF FIRST IN 2023.

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Understand that the inability to say NO is a major issue for MOST people. 

Plenty of people never get there.

Not everyone can do this even though they have the ability to do so.

And it's a practice, a HABIT that needs to be developed.

You must encourage yourself to establish boundaries of what is and isn't acceptable. 

It's vital.

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4. You dont follow through with your word.

If you make a PROMISE to do something and don’t do it, people will think that you won’t be able to keep your word in the FUTURE. 

You end up LOSING their respect and they won’t have a reason to listen to you ever again.

Trust is an expensive currency nowadays and when you build that with people by following through with your commitments, you GAIN their respect.

Make it a point to hold up your end of the bargain.

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You AUTOMATICALLY respect people who are GREAT.

The reason you respect athletes or entrepreneurs is because you know they are BALLING.

You should work on becoming the BEST version of yourself and you won't need to do anything.

They will want to show you respect PUBLICLY.

This is why the CEO status gets respect whilst CLEANERS do not.

It is easier to be respected when your HIGH STATUS, because they know you went through HARD WORK and SUFFERING to get to that level.

Unlike most people who DON’T get respect because they chase the easy route of mediocrity.

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Don't ever allow people to BELITTLE you, especially not in front of others.

Get angry sometimes and show people you can stand your ground, and win.

These status games are ALWAYS BEING PLAYED. 

You CAN choose to not give a shit about them, which, in a way is a high-status move.

But eventually, you will NEED to care, know your social standing and be able to defend it.

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So if you're in agreement with all this, here's what you can start doing:

1) Make a FIRM decision right now that from now on, you deserve MORE respect and never less, no matter what.

2) Make a FIRM decision right now that you're going to take YOURSELF and your life more seriously.

3) Take some NEW ACTION today that will demonstrate this to yourself. 

“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.”

@ionicxbt