endlessjess

Request Rat: Sonic 3

Added 2025-02-03 22:42:57 +0000 UTC

This movie was dumb as hell because of course it was. It's Sonic The Freaking Hedgehog 3. But someone just had to hear what I have to say about it. What even is there to say?

It's just Sonic, man. Everybody knows his whole deal. He goes fast, he's annoying, and his best friends are a gaybo and a dipshit. I'm on Robotnik's side because he's the only sane person in this world.

I swear Jim Carrey must have wrote his own dialogue because his scenes are like an entirely different movie that's actually funny and entertaining. Every second he's not on screen is a second i want back.

The fact that there are already 3 of these movies is proof that we're living in a vortex of Time Compression. I've somehow seen all 3, but i have about as many opinions on them as I have chili dogs when Sonic is around, which is none, cause i know the little bastard will steal them all.

Shadow is not cool. We all made fun of his assy game and his corny atitude back in the day, but now everyone's been gaslit by fake nostalgia marketing to believe they always liked him. That shit don't work on me. He sucked then and he sucks now.

The only good non-Robotnik scene in this movie is Knuckles making Pikachu sounds at the Chao Garden while mascots sing Japanese Jackson 5 Karaoke. That got a chuckle from me. ONE chuckle. That's all these varmints are worth.