Midnight Pals: Internet Beefs

[mysterious circle of robed figures]
Maya Forstater: dark lord! dark lord! terrible news!
Forstater: i just heard they're going to put you in jail!
Forstater: also i heard that antifa supersoldiers are going to execute all the small business owners in the town square

JK Rowling: ah yesss apparently sscotland thinksss it can jusssst pass sssome law ssaying you can't hate crime transs people
Rowling: ha "hate crime"
Rowling: what doess that even mean?
Rowling: you don't even know what you're getting

Rowling: well i won't sstand for thiss
Rowling: i don't care if i have to beef with every random transss on twitter
Rowling: they had it coming
Rowling: bitches shouldn't have mouthed off

Forstater: but dark lord! what if they put you in jail for beefing on the internet?
Rowling: i'm not sscared! i don't care whosss toesss i ssstep on!
Rowling: here i beef, i can do no other!
Forstater: oh my god what a fearless truth teller!

Rowling: sssee i have a plan to tessst the limitsss of thisss ssso-called law
Rowling: i will sssyssstematically beef with every SSINGLE transs on twitter, one by one
Rowling: that will sshow them!
Rowling: you're firsst, @Girldick_Cheney240!!

Rowling: [typing furiously] ok @blahajj_to_Mecca, you're up next!
Rowling: "you suck"
Rowling: "don't like me fearlessly telling truth to your face?"
Rowling: "then you should have got more followers"

Rowling: [typing furiously] i took down @bigfatboypussy69 and now i'm taking down @puppygirlforsaleX__X
Rowling: now for @fatwerewolfmommydom3
Rowling: oh wait that follow count iss kind of high
Rowling:
Rowling: maybe i'll sskip that one

Rowling: whosss next on my lisst?
Rowling: "@anarchroach"
Rowling:
Rowling: i'm not sssure about thisss one
Rowling: but i'll risssk it
[elsewhere]
Franz Kafka: why is jk rowling yelling at me

Rowling: well well well
Rowling: i've ssuccessssfully yelled at EVERY transss on twitter and yet
Rowling: the sscottish police have not arresssted me!
Rowling: i guessss i proved that lawsss aren't real
Rowling: door'ss open, boyss!
[terfs hooting and hollering]