'No Laughing Matter' (Becca Version)

[Alternate Text: A header image of a Wonder Woman ring. It has a relatively understated design, appearing to be made of aged bronze with her double 'W' symbol in its center. It's resting on what appears to be a stone surface. The title 'No Laughing Matter' is in a unique font that's whimsical with squiggles and little lines above each letter. It has a golden-orange glow effect around it.]

Clack… clack… clack…

You minimally lower the outdated, lifestyle magazine from in front of your face to stare down Ruby. She doesn't immediately return your attention, but when she does, her smirk is paired with an additional toothy smile. It has way too many teeth showing because that's meant for dental demonstrations. "Put it down, Verner."

"You have the only good magazine," she points out, waving a hand at the paltry offerings in the waiting area. "I already read 'When You Give a Mouse a Cookie' in school, not that it stopped me from revisiting it today… But I am bored." A particularly sharp clack comes from the resin teeth to punctuate her statement. "You are stressed despite not being the one on the operating table. Also, extra prickly and gruff."

"It isn't that kind of surgery," you retort. "She's nervous, so I'm nervous in sympathy."

Ruby appears unconvinced by your reasoning, though she does set aside the jaws to settle in the chair beside you. The fact she's here as well shows just how anxious Becca is. Of course, she would want you by her side inside and out of Fernweh; however, you're both firmly still in the town's boundaries. The way the townsfolk have treated her could influence the dentist who needs to perform a minor operation that requires at least one person accompanying the patient. The Verner heir being present ensures the Hippocratic oath. Becca's nerves about the level of care prompted you to invite your friend.

The dentist seems perfectly professional, yet Ruby happily went back to talk with him.

It gave you and Becca more time together until she was called, except that was hours ago. It isn't a packed practice. Routine cleanings might take time away from the hygienists, but not the actual dentist. You're getting antsy.

"At this rate, they could never use you for any of their smiley brochures, [Surname]."

Your concerned frown deepens after Ruby's attempt at levity for your sake. She mirrors it to a lesser degree before elegantly standing up to approach the front desk. She's inquiring about a status update on Becca. Her voice hardly carries over the folk music playing in the area, which only prompts you to lean forward some.

Within a few minutes, Ruby returns with two lollipops in hand that you're tempted to smack because something's up. She dragged her feet on the return walk; it wasn't her usual stride. You're starting to know her better as friends.

"It seems counterintuitive to me as well," she starts. "But they had blackberry, and I got you the—"

"What'd you learn?"

"—orange one," Ruby breezily finishes. "I will go with the good news first then the bad. Good: it went perfectly. She is coming to. Bad: your dearest was so anxious, they used laughing gas hence the longer wait time for its effects."

"It wasn't her wisdom teeth just a little—"

"Yes, I know," Ruby gently interrupts. "We will be invited back shortly to see her. She is fine."

"I should've gone back there." She fiddles with the plastic wrapper, still giving you her total attention while letting you speak. The lollipop is a rich mauve color that shines. "I know the rooms are tiny, but still… I could've helped."

"You also could have been a distraction, a very well-meaning one," she clarifies. "It is done, and you will be there now for her recovery period, which is mostly just ice cream for a day."

"That's not what the nurse said."

"It's the rough translation of soft foods for a day and swishing with that stuff. I did listen."

Ruby smirks around her lollipop when you do finally crack a smile at her teasing and care; however, you won't be relieved until you're with–

"Becca Warrick?" A lady in scrubs pops her head out from a door, scanning the room. "Oh, excuse me, her spouse and Miss Verner."

Her what?

Ruby seems less floored than you are by this woman's kind-hearted assumption, setting her treat aside to stifle a laugh as the two of you follow after the nurse. She's quick-footed, only sparing you a quick glance, whereas Ruby's is a couple seconds longer. The scent of mint mingles with that of a sterile cleanliness; there are multiple rooms for cleanings. Surgery must take place in the back rooms. You follow along.

"Please remember she might experience mild confusion and disorientation. She's such a champ—never had a patient squeeze my hand that hard. Reminded me of my sister's labor, but Becca did very well," she shares. "Here."

You pause by the door at the thought of Becca squeezing someone else's hand, which allows Ruby to open it first. She knows better than to go inside before you. You're the first one in to see Becca leaning back on the reclined chair, just staring up at the boring ceiling tiles until she hears her newfound company. Within a split second, she's beaming at you. "Bee," you exhale her nickname. "How are you feeling?"

Becca flashes a double thumbs up, becoming mildly distracted by the left one before her eyes are back on you again. "Floaty, not gonna lie," she admits. "I missed you so much." She gestures to a nearby chair that's been pulled into place by hers. "Yours—I made her do it."

There's a conspiratorial edge to Becca's comment about the nurse as she continues to take you in. The warmth to her expression is yours alone, cutting through the after effects from the laughing gas. You take her hand in yours before—

"Where's your wedding band? Did you lose it?"

Her pure happiness at your arrival becomes cratered with worry before you feel exactly what that nurse was talking about in Becca's grip strength. It doesn't hurt; she would never, but it's a solid hold. Her eyebrows knit together in honest befuddlement as she flips your palm over as if the ring is hiding somewhere. That isn't how a band of metal even works. "I—"

"And who is she?"

Ruby's budding amusement abruptly fizzles out after that's posed by Becca in what seems to be confused hostility. "Oh, rest assured I—"

"She's blonde," Becca interjects, stating it as a hard fact or final conclusion. She twines a section of her light brown hair between her fingers in obvious scrutiny. She's still holding onto your hand. "They have more fun—a movie said so."

"It was one movie. There are plenty of blonde jokes as well. You are absolutely gorgeous."

"I made my vows to only one"—Becca prods you in a gentle poke—"person, sorry. We're full up."

Ruby tries and fails to mask a good humored smile at your girlfriend's behavior—the happiness, hostility, insecurity, and then loyalty to you is all blending together. She uses her lollipop to gesture between you. "A shame."

"Verner, don't," you warn her. "Let's not confuse her more. Becca, we aren't married." Her face falls in an instant, crushingly disappointed, and it causes your heart to twist even if this is a dumb drug's fault. How much was the dosage to calm her anxiety? "Uh, yet. My ring's at the cleaner's—getting cleaned. Ruby is in my wedding party, okay? My friend; you're more."

Ruby appears unimpressed by your rushed lie, but she endorses it with a nod. "Yes, we need to finalize the ice cream pairings for your cake."

Through her hazy confusion, your girlfriend carefully weighs each of your words before she pulls you closer for a hug that you relax into.

"Okay," Becca happily agrees. "As long as I'm marrying the most beautiful person in the world, the blonde can be there too, I guess."

You barely hear Ruby's hushed scoff in the background while so focused on Becca now.

. . .

. .

.

"…Did I hurt her feelings?"

Becca's question is mumbled against your neck as she cuddles you on the couch. It helps to wake you up after a binge marathon of her favorite movies. "Who? Ruby? Absolutely not," you reassure her. "We both know you were still under the gas's effects. Please don't worry."

She says nothing for a while, pulling you closer.

"Her name just wasn't coming to mind." She shuffles so her left hand is in easy view. "I don't see how I thought a Wonder Woman novelty ring was a wedding one either… I just—it was so easy to remember you, [Nickname]. I thought of you before anything else—everything else, really." Becca rests her hand in its place on your waist. "I did miss you though."

"I never left."

"Still missed you," she murmurs, placing a soft kiss to your cheek before pulling back to regard you more earnestly. "But don't take anything I said as pressure. We haven't talked about that stuff yet, and I don't want one dentist visit to make things weird… I do want to be in your life for as long as you'll let me, but the marriage thing isn't—I didn't really have a filter."

"Yeah, I think 'the blonde' would agree." Becca half-smiles at your humor that was more for her than you. "I know what you mean, but I didn't mind being called your spouse either…"

Becca's eyes widen slightly at your honesty, an adorable flicker of surprise mingling with her raw hope. She'll start to blush soon enough, and you'll be right here to admire her as 'the most beautiful person in the world' too. You lean in to share an affectionate kiss with her that's also a reassurance for your future plans.

You had already thought about spending the rest of your life with Becca Warrick.