END OF JULY UPDATE

hey folks!

it's the end of the month again, so i wanted to update y'all on The State Of Things here in the zedig household.

i've got three videos filmed and in the editing process. one of them is my stream discussing the rhetoric used in michael smerconish's interview with roger waters. that would have come out by now except i made a really dumb oversight in the edit that requires me to essentially start all over. i've switched from premiere pro to davinci resolve for video editing, which hasn't been nearly the hassle i expected but still has a bit of a learning curve.

the second video is a discussion of the use of spectacle in the marvel film shang-chi, and the third is a look at the queer themes of both the todd haynes film velvet goldmine and orson welles' citizen kane (with a lengthy side rant about the creative economy and the shocking regression of culture in the last 20 years that may or may not end up becoming a backer-exclusive thing).

the reason for the delay of these as well as any new trans questioning comes down, as ever, to economic circumstance and untreated ADHD. let's set aside the always stress-inducing crumbling american empire and its fascistic verve for eugenic covid policies, transphobic fearmongering, and infinite blank checks to the cops. part of the problem has been that, now that i am well and truly (KNOCK ON WOOD) out of crisis mode for the first time in two years, i'm able to see just how outdated so many aspects of my process are. i basically haven't changed anything since like... 2017? so i've been playing around and trying new things.

i want to address my Tunic video- i still still intend for that to be my next fully scripted video! but i needed to get my hands dirty with some messier projects first. the fact is i'm rusty! there's a lot i need to change and frankly i'm embarrassed at myself for being so thoroughly roadblocked for so long. i've got a chip on my shoulder about it, i do have some shit to prove, but it does feel like things are moving again. they're just, you know, not quite moving as fast as i'd like. anyway my goal is to get one of the vids i've already shot out there in the next week or so, and then time my Tunic vid to come out close to the game's PS4 release date of september 27.

but honestly the biggest reason for the delay is that at the end of june and throughout july, i had no ADHD meds, which just so happened to coincide with a personal crisis of confidence. BUT I HAVE THEM AGAIN NOW! they're a much smaller dose than i'd like but hey, it's a start. one day at a time, man.

thank you all so much for your patience and support. next time you hear from me, it'll be with Stuff. take care of yourselves