SLIPPING INTO DEPRAVITY - Ch. 28, Romance and Semen in the Purple Sky

THE ROMANTIC INTERLUDE, PART FOUR OF FOUR

KAYLEY POV

I laid my head on Sam’s chest, just above the grape smear. It was purple-ish.

Well, that answered that. I played with his limp cock. Limp, hard, stiffening, coming, I just loved the damned thing. Hell, I’d even watch him pee with it. It was sort of purple-ish in parts, but not as much as I thought. I guess I’d licked the grape dye off most of it.

“Hey Babe,” I asked, “recovering?”

He took a deep breath.

“I’ll need a few more minutes,” he sighed.

I laughed. It was funny. Leroy was a pretty good sexual powerhouse, but he took forever to bounce back, and sometimes he had to work for it. Like an hour or more. That was probably his biggest weakness. I really wasn’t sure what that was about. Maybe he had some kind of condition?

“Oh, I know that silly!” I teased. “No, I was asking how you feel.”

I’d been a little worried that he might have stroked out or had a heart attack or something. Crazy

I know. Totally impossible.

“Oh,” he said. “I feel tingly, but tingly good. That was really intense.”

He chuckled.

“It was indescribable. I think my heart is still racing.”

It was. I could feel it.

I squirmed and cuddled against him, kissing his cheek.

“How about it,” I asked. “Hungry? Thirsty?”

I shifted position, pulling the cooler up on the other side of him, and peeked in.

“Looks like the grapes are done. But, we still have cheese, shrimp, crab.... ooh, chocolates!”

“Yeah,” he said. “That was the back up.”

I nodded in agreement.

“You’re right. Let’s save that. Hmmm. Bottled water.”

“In case of emergency.”

“Uh huh,” I said. “You left something out.”

He looked down at me, curiously.

“I’m really disappointed. You’re so thorough. It’s a nice spread. The wine glasses? Excellent touch. But, I’m amazed you left out something so obvious.”

I had him on the ropes, he looked genuinely concerned. Had he dropped the ball?

“What?”

I put on my most serious expression.

“Condoms,” I said, and nodded solemnly.

Here it comes, the big unforced grin, and then he tried to hold it back, but he couldn’t. He snorted, and laughed.

“Slut!” he chuckled.

“Bitch,” I corrected.

“Whore!” he whispered.

I kissed him.

“For you? Believe it, babe.”

I plucked a cube of cheese from the cooler, and held it in my lips, drawing close to his face. Our lips touched, and the cheese moved, to his lips, his jaws parted and it vanished. He chewed.

“Dry.”

“Fortunately,” I said, twisting and bending to pick it up from the floor, “there’s a nice Chablis.”

I felt him move, and when I turned back, he was reaching down for his wine glass.

“Baaaaaaaaaaaaaabe!” I drawled, pushing him back. “Don’t make any strenuous moves like that. You’ll hurt yourself. Besides, you should just drink from the tap...Like I just did.”

And to demonstrate, I wrapped my lips around the neck of the bottle and raised it up high, taking a mouthful. From the corner of my eye, I could see his eyes glitter.

“Do you ever stop?” he asked.

“Piffle!” I replied. “How long have you known me?”

“So... never.”

“Damned straight,” I drawled. “So... Do I need to show you again?”

“Give it here,” he suppressed a snort. I handed it over, and he put it to his lips.

“Thirsty?”

“Yeah.”

I glanced down and waggled his cock while he drank, just to see if I could make him spill some

so I could lick it off his chest. No joy.

“You know,” I said, “It’s been five whole minutes and you’re not hard again. I think you’re getting bored with me.”

“Not a chance!” he said. “I’m still recovering.”

“Mmm hmmm,” I said, I grabbed a couple of shrimp, squeezing off the tail shells. “See, I can be ladylike.” I tucked one between his lips. “All those bodily fluids of mine you devilishly

swallowed, I took them all back.”

“And then some,” he replied. I just stuck out my tongue and made clawing motions at the bottle so he’d hand it back.

We relaxed, saying silly things to each other, kissing, passing the bottle back and forth, working our way through the cheese and seafood. We had fun feeding each other, and giggling for no good reason at all, and just cuddling. I got his sweaty stupid shirt off, and then we were just naked together on top of the city.

“Evil,” I purred contentedly. I waggled his cock, it was filling out nicely. He was still recovering, I was very pleased with myself, I’d really flattened him. It felt like an accomplishment.

“Hey,” he said, I rubbed my face on his shoulder, hanging onto the bottle.

“Mmm?”

“Check it out.” He pointed. “Sunset.”

“Mmm?” I looked.

It was gorgeous, the sun wasn’t down yet, but it was closing on the horizon. Shadows were growing long, and it gave the buildings spreading out beneath us a new quality, a new texture. The skyline around the sun was full of soft clouds, golds further out, shifting towards pinks and reds, framed by pale blue growing darker and darker higher and higher into the sky, until it was just this sweet deep azure.

I gave a long sigh, “That’s amazing.”

“We don’t watch enough sunsets,” Sam said.

“I know,” I replied. “And they’re all over tiktok. Even more than cat videos.”

He didn’t laugh, but I felt his chest twitch and smile.

“I mean,” I said, “Where else would I watch sunsets, if not on my phone?”

“Good point,” he said.

That cock was coming along nicely. I sneakily began to go down, but he caught me and lifted me into a kiss. Still, I had my hand on it.

“So, Evil love of my life: Blow Job II, the Suckening?”

“Suckening?” We exchanged sweet little kisses. “Is that even a word?” he asked.

“It is now.”

I lowered my head.

“I have another idea.”

I rolled my eyes.

“Oh let me guess, you want to fuck me while we watch the sunset? Is that it, Mister Crazy Romantic? Mister Insatiable? Mister Too Good for My Blow Jobs Anymore?”

“Kind of, sort of.”

I stood up, keeping the wine bottle, and stretched, just arching my back and rolling my hips. I went up on tip toes for a second and then stretched my arms.

“I detect flaws in your evil plan.”

“Mmm?”

Sam stood up, moving behind me, to cup my breasts and nuzzle my shoulder. I loved how he touched me, it made me squirm with delight.

“Well first,” I said, “You would need to get me naked.”

“You are naked.” he stated.

His chin rested on my shoulder, I could tell he was looking out at the sunset and not at me.

But...it was gorgeous. His hands slid down my body.

“Darn!” I said, rubbing back against him. “Second, you would need to get naked, without me noticing.”

“I am naked,” he responded.

“Damn it!” I said, “I hadn’t noticed! Well, I’d have to be really really wet–Oooh.”

His fingers tapped my clit in a slow devilish rhythm, like I was a flamenco guitar. He’d picked up some tricks. My pussy clenched wetly.

“Well,” I said, “I guess the last thing, the impossible thing, the thing you’ll never achieve and therefore all your evil plans will be foiled.”

“Which is?” he asked.

“You’d have to be really super-duper-mega-hard, diamond hard, like pounding nails into two by fours with your penis hard, deflecting bullets with your erection hard. No common ordinary hard- on will do. I have standards, I want an erection capable of raising drawbridges.”

His erection pressed between my cheeks.

“Not good enough,” I announced and giggled.

“Oh yeah,” he said warningly.

I wiggled my butt, swinging it from side to side, then making this slow rolling motion with my hips that I knew turned him on like crazy. My breasts swayed beneath me, nipples rigid, and the sunset, the city and the sky stretched out before me.

But, I didn’t have the surging weightless vertigo of the earlier times. Instead, this felt...right. It felt like it all fit together. I didn’t feel like I’d fly weightlessly up into the sky. I felt grounded. No, I felt I was perfectly in my place, perfectly secure, as if I was anchored, as if I belonged here, that I was a part of everything.

I could feel Sam’s hands tightening on my hips, his fingers digging into my butt, his hardness and urgency, his need for me.

“Wait!” I said.

He paused. I straightened, kneeling on the chair, and twisted my body, turning to him. I reached for him with one hand, my other still hanging onto the bottle.

“One more kiss,” I said, and then our lips met, our mouths opened. Tongues touched, not wantonly, but gently.

That’s enough, I thought. This is it, I thought. It can stop now, as his lips pressed against mine, as our bodies touched, bathed in the warm light of the sunset, both of us luminous. It can all stop now. Time can stop. This is the moment I want to be eternity, the moment that I wanted to last forever. This instant between us, embedded in amber, forever, eternal, unchanging. This is it, the moment so sweet and perfect, I never wanted to leave it.

But of course it ended.

“Hey,” I whispered, and I didn’t have any other words. I felt tears in my eyes and turned away, hoping that he wouldn't see them.

Instead, I just turned, folding one arm on the top of the deck chair’s cushion, letting the other hand dangle while holding the wine bottle. I looked out at a breathtakingly beautiful sunset in front of me, feeling the breathtakingly beautiful man behind me, feeling his hands returning to my hips, adjusting me. The light was soft, the air was warm and cool at once. I arched my back, inhaled and let it out slowly.

I felt the head of his cock behind me, pressing gently against my pussy lips.

“Yes,” I whispered.

Sam surprised me. I thought he would lunge into me, thrusting hard, filling me instantly. But instead, he entered slowly. Not as slow as Leroy that night, but slow enough. My body welcomed him as he filled me. I gave this long sigh of deep deep satisfaction, brought the wine to my mouth for one last draft, and just surrendered my body to it all, to pleasure and contentment on every level, right down to my cells.

He didn’t fuck me, instead, we made love, his thrusts measured and stately. I moved back and forth slightly, bent kneeling over the chair, our bodies moving in time, moving in symphony. His hands felt like satin on my skin, as they moved along my back. We shifted, and I felt his breath on my neck as his erection arched upwards in me. We shifted again, and I rose up.

The sun slowly slid lower, the sky darkening, the colours in the clouds becoming more vivid. It was glorious. Everything was glorious, the sky was like a painting slowly changing, the landscape breathtaking, shadows were like silk blankets, and the air - warm and cool by turns, felt almost liquid and friendly. My skin tingled with the remains of the day’s excitement and arousal, and the flavours of drenching orgasms, and my body was warm with wine.

Perhaps it was a memory, but I swore I could still smell the lingering scent of roses, taste the residue of wine and semen and his sweat. My abdominals ached from the cat’s cradle, but even that was sweet, a reminder of my own aliveness.

Most delicious of all was him inside me, each movement was a slow wave of pleasure. He took his time, his thrusts measured and passionate, and as he went deep he ground into me, sending waves of ecstasy radiating through my clit, passing up into my body. I was in this state of hyper-awareness, blended awareness, the world everywhere around me. But most of all, him. I hungered for each moment when his hips flattened against my ass, felt so sated as our flesh pressed together. I ached and rejoiced for each touch of his hand. I listened for the sound of his breathing, the slap of our flesh.

I needed more of him. Twisting in the chair, I turned around, flattening my ass on the seat, my legs lifting in a whore’s prayer, beckoning him to come inside me. My hand lowered to my pussy, not to open it for him but to feel his cock, fingers tickling his shaft as he slid inside. We looked at each other, him down and me up, and then we kissed hungrily. My hands were all over him. The chair rocked, going up on its two back legs as he thrust harder and harder, and we ground into each other.

Sam wrapped his arms around my waist as he drove into me, fucking with building intensity. He pulled me to him, lifting me up off the chair. For a moment, he was standing, holding me, my weight sinking me hard onto his cock. I thrust my hips, fucking him as we stood, our arms tight against each other. He walked me to the loveseat, I dropped heavily on it, and he loomed above me before mounting, his cock pushing deep and full.

We fucked and made love, we devoured each other with our hands, our eyes, our mouths and hips. Sweat dripped, we sighed and gasped and spoke incoherent words. Sometimes I was on top, sometimes he was. Sometimes we fucked to the sunset, and sometimes seeing only each other.

We only came once, at the end, exhausted. I felt it shuddering and shivering up inside me like a tidal wave, and then his hit. We grabbed each other, our bodies merging as white light burst up inside both of us, and we clung like two flowers in a hurricane.

As it eased, we held each other, our bodies pressed together. I felt his cock go soft in me, but when he moved, I tightened my legs around him and held him closer.

“Just leave it,” I whispered, and kissed him, running my fingers through his hair.

We laid there, sprawled on the loveseat. It was broken, the legs on one side snapped off. When did that happen? I hadn’t noticed. Had it been like that from the start? I didn’t think so.

But, Sam’s sweaty body was joined tight against mine, so who cared. We kissed and relaxed, touched each other, and just let it come down. Beyond us, the sun dipped below the horizon, it got darker and darker, and we watched the city's lights come on. Window lights in the buildings, street lights next.

For a while, we didn’t talk. We didn’t need to. We just relaxed and watched, our hands joined, fingers twined, just enjoying being in each other’s presence. Sometimes you don’t need to talk - yes, I know - who are you and what have you done with Kayley? But it’s true, sometimes you don’t need to say anything. You just need to be there.

Finally, the sun was gone, the sky was dark, and the city was a maze of tiny lights. I guess the show was over. The air was a little cold, and I wished for a blanket, but he didn’t produce one. I guess there was a limit to his diabolical planning.

I supposed we’d get back into our clothes when it got cold enough, and go home. No hurry.

Fuck, I thought, what an epic amazing day. Just unbelievable. One for the record books. The memory of this day would keep me warm when I was ninety. Top of the top ten, and number two far below. Leroy was exciting, but he couldn’t even come close to this.

“Damn!” I said, exhausted. “The only thing Leroy has that is bigger or better than you is his ego.”

Sam laughed explosively, and I held him just a little tighter.

“I was wondering when he’d make an appearance,” Sam said, quietly. “It’s coming up fast.”

Oh fuck, I thought. I kicked myself for my heedless comment. His shadow loomed over us.

“Yep,” he said.

It occurred to me that maybe this whole day was some kind of reaction? That Sam was asserting his masculinity or his potency or something. Showing that he could be creative and virile too? Was he insecure? He didn’t need to be. Sam was perfect, or as perfect as I could imagine a man being. But maybe.

Men. I could never really figure them out. Even Sam, I knew him better than I’d known anyone.

But there were still depths and tender places I only vaguely understood. Insecurities and needs I could only respect and try to meet, when I encountered them.

Men were mysterious and complicated, even the simple ones like Leroy.

And there I went again. Goddamit!

Fuck, fuck fuck! He was like fungus, he just crept in. It was like that thing, try not to think of a pink unicorn, and once you’d told yourself not to, you couldn’t help thinking about him. Fuck, I wanted mind bleach.

“He takes up a lot of real estate in our heads these days,” I said, thoughtfully.

“Yep,” Sam agreed, “Living rent free.”

He paused, I could tell he was trying to shift our thoughts away from the upcoming session.

“Speaking of our friend,” Sam said “Do you remember when I told you he claimed to have been a porn star?”

I laughed.

“Yeah,” I said, “He has so many stories he’d have to be three different people for them all to work. I think the only reason he hasn’t told us about his time in the space program is that I made fun of it.”

“Well I did some searches, and looked him up,” Sam said, “And it turns out he really was a porn star. A real up and comer too.”

I sat up, turning to look directly at him.

“No fucking way!” I laughed. “You’re kidding! When was this? How did you find him?”

“Well he mentioned his porn star name so I decided to check it out. It turns out that the porn community is extremely well documented, lots of fan sites, lots of catalogs, directories, reviews.”

“There are porn reviewers?”

“Oh yeah, it’s a thriving community,” he said. “There’s a lot online and not just the actual fucking. So I found him. I found clips, scenes, it was him for sure. I was even able to research his career.”

“Holy shit,” I grinned. “I want to hear all about it!”

“Well,” Sam said, as he fed me shrimp. “He seems to have showed up in Los Angeles a couple of years after his music career ended.”

“How do you know when his music career ended?”

Sam smiled beatifically, like the cat that ate the canary.

“I looked that up too. I did a lot of searching. I was able to document his musical career, and that was for real. What I can verify anyway.”

“Well,” We knew that. “The album cover...and his fingering.”

We both blushed.

“Glory was where he peaked out. He was reasonably well known in the trade, not famous, but he worked with several bands. He just seemed to drift. He was almost on the edge of the big time with Glory but the band broke up, and after that fell apart, he disappeared.”

“Two and a half years later, he showed up in porn, and for a while he was like the next big thing. Very popular. He could actually act, had a lot of charisma, ready to go at the drop of a hat and worked really well with crews. He worked with a lot of people, popular with his...co-stars?”

“Any famous porn stars? Anyone we’d know?”

“I’d gather...yes? I don’t know who’s who in the porn star business. But, I gather he made his way into the top tier pretty fast.”

“You could be a porn star,” I said.

“Thanks.”

“No,” I said. “I’m serious. You’re hung, you can get an erection like that!” I snapped my fingers. “You can last. Amazing control. Usually.” I caught a quick blush. “And you can recover to go again in minutes. Also, you’re just a hotty.”

He blushed more deeply.

“Thanks. Anyway, Leroy...got involved in the business side, did some directing and seems to have connected with most of the major people around that time. He was one of those occasional porn stars that they talk about that has breakthrough potential.”

“He was even involved in a project to do a series - crossovers, the idea was he would work with non-porn, mainstream. Reality show stars, wrestling stars, influencers, b-list actresses whose careers had stalled out. A lot of names were getting thrown around, some we’d recognize.”

“And then?”

“Then out of the blue, he goes off to Europe. Works in eastern-bloc countries, Poland, Romania, Bulgaria. Some fetish stuff. Works under different names. Then zap, he’s gone. Vanishes.”

“Interesting, interesting,” I said, thoughtfully, “I wonder if something happened?”

“Possibly. No idea,” Sam said. “But whatever it was, it seems to have been abrupt. One day he’s apparently cruising along, nominated for rewards, and on the verge of being the next big thing. Then he’s gone. Maybe it was too much for him? Maybe he didn’t want to build a life around this?”

He paused.

“I can see that…you know. Being a porn star for the fun of it, but kind of wanting out when it got too serious.”

I shrugged.

“Would you want to be a porn star for the fun of it yourself?” I teased.

He smiled bashfully.

“I suppose a little bit, doesn’t everyone secretly want to be a star?”

“Well I have never wanted to be a porn star,” I said righteously.

Sam laughed.

“So that’s why we have a collection of videos of you naked? With you masturbating? Giving me blow jobs? Having sex with me? Having sex with Leroy?”

I stuck my tongue. “Oh! But that’s different.”

Sam raised an eyebrow.

“I’m photogenic,” I said airily.

“Ah.”

“It would be a crime against humanity not to have a record of how hot I am. Future generations will need this. I’m doing it for our children and grandchildren.”

“Uhm...” Sam held up a finger. I could see he was searching for words. I smiled innocently. The finger dropped.

“Anyway,” he said, changing the subject, “Interesting thing! I wondered what he was doing between Glory and Porn movies. So I poked around online and you know what I found?”

“He was commanding the International Space Station?” I guessed.

“Close!” Sam said. “He was in Wyoming, he was actually a cowboy!”

“You’re shitting me!” I laughed out loud.

“Nope. That was harder. But I poked around, I had a time frame, and lost a few crawlers. I turned up an H.L. Verne on the rodeo circuit. Zeroed in and hunted some more until I found a picture, and there he was: Our guy!”

“You’re kidding!”

He shook his head.

“Holy cow,” I said, “So he really was a cowboy? He wasn’t shitting us? Fuck, if he tells us he was an astronaut I might have to believe him.”

“There’s a limit to what I could dig up,” Sam said. “It looks like he worked for a couple of different ranches, he was in a few rodeos, different events, trick riding, Bronco busting. He wasn’t a big name or a headliner, by any means but yes he was there. And the next thing you know he is in Los Angeles doing a different kind of bronco busting.”

I spoke thoughtfully. “You know that the first time I was at his place, I saw an old magazine laying out. It was one of those airline magazines that nobody reads. But there was a feature in it about doctors Without Borders and ambulance drivers in Kenya, and there was a picture that looked like him.”

“Interesting,” Sam said. “Did you read it? Was his name in it? What did it say?”

I rolled my eyes.

“Do you even remember our first visit to his place?”

Sam blushed and laughed.

“Vaguely.”

“Uh huh,” I said smugly.

I paused.

“It’s really hanging over our heads,” I said quietly. “Over your head.”

He nodded.

“Yeah.”

I thought for a moment that he looked so sad and wistful. Then, I thought to myself, let’s cancel this. Let’s forget about Leroy, and be together just the two of us.

“I guess I just want it, you know. This. You and me time, you know,” he said thoughtfully “Just the two of us having fun together. Without our ‘friend.’

“We don’t have to do this, you know.” I said.

“Do you want to?” he asked. I looked away. Kind of, yes. If he needed it, yes. If he wanted to, yes. It was about him. I couldn’t make a choice for him.

“Do you want to?” I asked.

Say no, I thought, and it’s over, and we’ll never look back. Say yes, and ease my conscience. Leroy says you need this, to get this out of your system. He said so much bullshit about how you needed this. Is it true? Is it false? Say something.

He looked away.

“You’re bolder.”

A long moment passed.

“All you babe. It’s all you. You make me brave.”

“No,” he said, “I think we’ve both gotten a lot braver.”

He paused thoughtfully.

“Is that the word? More outgoing, more adventurous? That’s the word since Leroy. He’s kind of opened up doors. I don't think we would have done this before we met him. I suppose we’re not as innocent as we used to be.”

“Good thing? Bad thing?” I asked.

“Good thing,” he said after a moment. “What makes you stronger, braver, more adventurous. That’s a good thing. If you’ve grown, that’s a good thing. If you are fulfilled, more fulfilled, it’s a good thing.”

“What about you?”

He thought about it.

“Some parts are definitely rougher,” he said carefully. “But sometimes that’s how you grow... I suppose.”

“I asked him to go easier on you,” I said.

He looked down at me, cuddled in his arms.

“Did you?” he asked. “What did he say?”

“Honestly,” I replied, “He seemed kind of glad, as if he was nervous about going too far, hurting you.”

“It was pretty extreme,” he admitted.

“He agreed,” I said, licking my lips, trying to figure out how to approach this. “But, there was a condition...More of an ask, really.”

Except it hadn’t been an ask or a request, had it. That wasn’t the important part. It had been a promise, a promise I’d made with his cock buried in me, wanting it in me, wanting to feel his cum. It had been a promise full of certainty, like I’d been pledging from deep conviction.

The sort of promise you make passionately and fervently, binding yourself eagerly. And after, when you’ve cooled off, you wonder if you just made a deal with the devil. If you’ve sold your soul.

“Oh?”

“He said he’d go easy,” I chose the words carefully. “As long as I went hard. He figured we knew each other better, and I’d know how much you could take, how far I could go, and when to stop.”

I felt nervous butterflies rise up inside me, my heart sped up a little bit. I wanted to hold my breath, but instead tried to breathe normally. The silence behind me dragged on. I was glad we weren’t facing each other.

“Okay,” he said finally. “That makes sense.”

I tried to read his voice, read his body language, the tensions in his muscles.

“Does that bother you?” I asked.

He lifted his eyebrows.

“No, actually,” he said. “I’m actually pretty good with it. It makes sense. And I trust you. I’m actually intrigued. I think I feel safer if you’re the one doing it. The ‘hard’ stuff. If you’re up for it.”

Light as a feather, words drifted through my mind: Crush you, like a little cuck bug. I shivered involuntarily, a mixture of fear and anticipation.

“Watch out,” I warned him uneasily. “I can be pretty hard core.”

He kissed my forehead.

“Do your worst!” he ordered. “I double dog dare you!”

“Oh my! A challenge!” I said. “Famous last words!”

He laughed.

“Okay,” I said. “But listen, promise me. Promise me, if it gets too much, if you can’t handle it, you just say so, okay.”

He kissed the side of my head.

“Promise.”

“You’ll say uncle?”

He laughed.

“I won’t say uncle,” he assured me. “I can handle it.”

“But if you need to...” I warned.

“Then I’ll say it,” he reassured me again, “But I won’t need to. I trust you. Completely.”

I laughed, relieved by his absolute faith in me, in this deep abiding trust we had in each other. He was right, as long as we had that trust in each other, we’d be okay. I loved him so completely that at that moment, it was overwhelming.

“Careful what you wish for,” I almost giggled, squirming back against him.

“I think it’s what you are wishing for,” he teased. I felt a little shiver at this sign he understood my dark, deliciously cruel, side. “Happy to oblige.”

I laughed again with pleasure and relief.

“Oh I am so going to kick your ass,” I told him cheerfully. “See if I don’t. And I... we... will enjoy every moment of it.”

“Again, I dare you,” he laughed. “Do your worst!”

“I will!” I insisted. “I totally will!”

“You better,” he challenged. “Don’t hold back on my account.”

“Oh you are just asking for it, Mister!”

He chuckled.

“I’ll do it,” I said emphatically, “I’ll crush you like a little cuck bug!”

Shit, I’d said it out loud. I felt a moment of icy panic.

But he took no notice.

“As long as it’s you,” he said. “I know I’m safe with you.”

I nodded. You are, I promised myself.

“You are,” I told him. “Remember, it’s only a role play.”

“Got it.”

“After,” I said, full of conviction, “We go back to being our real selves.”

He nodded. I relaxed back against him, feeling deeply relieved, almost content. The knot of tension that had formed in me after I’d left Leroy had finally dissipated. Honestly, I hadn’t even realized it had formed, it had been so subtle. But now that it was gone, I felt lighter and happier.

Leroy guiding us through was one thing, he was good at getting us to trust him, and he took care of things. But it was better this way, when we worked it out between us, so that the two of us were on the same page: Team Kayley and Sam.

And somewhere, deep down, a dark little version of me, echoed the thing I had said to Leroy and instinctively repeated to Sam: Crush you, like a little cuck bug. And it laughed with an abyssal pleasure that made me shiver.

“Hey babe,” he whispered, his breath warm and most in my ear, “Look up.”

I gasped.

The sky was black, as black as I’d ever seen it, and full of stars, so many, so wondrous.

“My God,” I whispered, awed. I had never seen the sky so black. And the stars, they weren’t just pinpoints of light. I hadn’t really looked in years. But somehow, in that moment, it was magical, the sky was a dome all around us, not a dome, that implied flatness, a surface. But, there was no surface to the sky, no boundary, everything went on and on and on forever, each point of light was its own infinity. I was practically overwhelmed. “Look at them all. It’s...it’s...beautiful.”

“We’re above the worst of the light pollution from the city,” he murmured in my ear. “And it’s a moonless night. So you can see something.”

“It’s breathtaking!”

“It’s okay,” he said. “I guess you’re a city girl, don’t see them much? I grew up in a small town, and to get out in the country, it’s amazing. Ten times more than you’re seeing now. I’ll bring you out there sometime, we’ll have a midnight picnic in some farmer’s field.”

He reached out and pointed.

“See that? That bright one?”

“Yes?”

“That’s Polaris, the north star. As long as you can see it, you can always find your way. Over there, those three...”

His hand moved, pointing.

“Orion’s belt.”

We relaxed together, as he pointed out star after star, combinations and constellations, telling me the stories behind them. Half of them I didn’t get, but I nodded, living the sound of his voice and the way the words spilled out of him.

“That hazy patch there...”

“A cloud?”

“The Milky Way, that’s the galaxy we’re in.”

The finger moved.

“There...”

“The reddish one?”

“Good eye. That’s Mars. Let me see if I can pick out Jupiter for you...”

I could feel his cock against me, rigid against my bare back. Twisting in his arms, I reached up to kiss him.

“I want to make love to you,” I whispered. “Right under these stars. This is too beautiful, too perfect.”

I pushed him down on his back. He looked up at me, his eyes luminous.

“You’re hungry tonight.”

I laughed.

“You tease me with appetizers all day,” I told him. “You think I’d be happy with just the main course. I want the nine-course-Sam. I want Sam-dessert.”

“So now I’m dessert?”

“You’re delicious,” I said, straddling him.

His hands reached for my breasts, and as they cupped them, fingers splayed to hold as much as he could, I put my hands on top of his. For a moment, I saw myself the way I knew he must be seeing me, drenched in shadow, silhouetted by blackness, surrounded by the pinpoints of ten thousand stars, their light travelling for millions of years across half the universe, to come together for this moment.

I bent down, my hair sweeping forward, filling his view, and we kissed long and passionately, my hips hovering over him, feeling his cock battering at my pussy lips.

Finally, the kiss broke, and I straightened over him, staring up at the night sky as I sank down and let him fill me.

I glanced down at him, grinning, as I began to rock.

“Feel good?” I asked.

Goddamn, but he felt good. I don’t know what it was, but he felt perfectly seated inside me. He always felt just right, up inside me when I straddled him, but this felt especially, absolutely perfect, the slightest movement of his cock sending ripples of pleasure through me.

“Perfect,” he said. His hands slid across my breasts, down to my hips. He guided me just a little infinitesimal amount forward, rising up ever so slightly under me, and I felt a sudden delicate pleasure that seemed to emanate just under my clit. Goddamn he was good!

“You took the word right out of my mouth,” I moaned, and bent down to kiss him again.

This time our love making was unhurried. I just thrust up and down on him, with an easy rocking pace, holding each other’s hands, our fingers twining and interlocking, our gazes alternating between the stars and each other. The night air was cool and exquisite on my naked body, and sometimes I laughed with sheer pleasure and delight.

When I felt my first orgasm building, he seemed to feel it too, our tempo sweeping up together, until we were grinding furiously and I was squirting on top of him endlessly until I collapsed, boneless and breathless.

He held me in his arms, drenched and wet underneath me, his cock still rigid inside me, as I laid limp on top of him. Until finally I had the strength to raise my head and kiss him and whisper.

“I’m not done yet.”

I came a half dozen times. Every time I thought I was done, somehow I’d look at the stars above me and the man below, and I’d want him all over again.

When he finally came, his body went so stiff, he arched from his heels to his neck, lifting up like my weight was nothing. I could feel his ejaculation like a tidal wave inside me, a holy flood, a deluge that washed away any trace of the semen of all the lesser men who had come in me, including Leroy. The sheer intensity was like a contagion, and I fell into orgasm with him.

When it was over we just wrapped around each other, the sleeping bag loosely twisted around our bodies. We were both too hot and sweaty to be inside it.

As I drifted off, something occurred to me about our love making. He’d held off for me, he hadn’t come until the end, allowing me my pleasure, giving me my pleasure. He’d held back and restrained himself, delaying his orgasm, pushing it away, so I could have mine. He’d sacrificed his own pleasure for me. He always did that, every single time, always watching, the barometer of my pleasure dictating his own, my satisfaction, the permission for him. He always restrained himself, always denied himself, it was always for me and never for himself. That bothered me suddenly.

How many times had he come during that cuckold session with Leroy? A half dozen at least, without inhibition or holding back or restraining himself, without having to deny himself. It felt like an epiphany. As awful as it was for him, as humiliating and degrading, it had been liberating, it had freed him on some level to simply accept, to be, to experience. To be allowed to simply orgasm, without focusing on someone else’s pleasure.

Had I been so overwhelmed with my own excitement indulging in power and cruelty, that I’d simply failed to fully understand what went on within him. I was struck by how complicated it all was, how complicated the dynamics were within both me and Sam and with the two of us together.

Sam needed this, I understood that finally, he’d needed it all along, without either of us understanding or even suspecting. I felt reassured in my urges to cruelty and domination of him, they came from places of love. My insecurity and misgivings resolved. In the throes of this deep exhaustion I finally felt as if I’d figured it all out.

I wanted to talk about it with Sam, to spend the rest of the night just discussing it with him. After we’d rested. Maybe when we got home, and had gotten comfortable.

Thank God for Leroy, I thought randomly, he’d understood us, understood what we needed all along. Underneath that asshole exterior, there was someone good and decent, someone wonderful, even if he did act like an eight year old.

The thought drifted away, I nestled against Sam, looking up at the night sky. I was so tired.

“Let’s rest a bit,” I mumbled, or I thought I did. Just rest. I mean, we were soaking wet, I’d squirted to fill a swimming pool and we were laying in the middle of it, and we were on a rooftop, and we didn’t even have a blanket. We’d rest, recover and go home.

I fell asleep.

&&&

I woke early enough to see dawn’s light breaking over the horizon, half warm from where I’d pressed up against Sam, half cold and damp from the night, but somehow more alive than in years.

Then I moved, and ohhhh fuck! It hurt. I ached all over, especially my abdominals. It felt like someone had spent the night punching my stomach while I slept. Where did that come from? Then I remembered.

Sam slept on, his body so male and perfect in repose. No tension, no pretension, simply perfect unadorned maleness. He was so perfect I wanted a sculptor to come along and capture him like this. I watched him breath for a few minutes, just drinking him in. In the dawn’s tentative light, he almost glowed.

Even his cock, relaxed and limp, was perfect and male. I reached down, touched it gently, moving it from side to side, feeling it accept my touch. I tickled it just under the prepuce, watching its slow reaction.

Then, ever so carefully, I took him in my mouth, gently and carefully bringing it to erection. Just me and Sam’s cock, sans Sam, the two of us in communion. It was one of my favourite morning games, seeing just how hard I could get him, for how long, how much I could do before he finally woke.

I was delighted by his rigidity between my lips. All his fault, I decided mischievously, he’d addicted me to sucking his cock, and then failed to be on tap twenty-four seven, every minute of every day. What was a girl to do with cravings like that?

“Ohhh,” he moaned, his body shifted. I knew from the way his muscles tensed that he was waking.

“Ow!” he said as his stomach tightened. Yep, the cat's cradle struck again. He visibly relaxed and sighed.

“Morning sleepyhead,” I lifted my mouth off him for a moment. “Having that dream again?”

“Yeah, the one where I dream you’re sucking my cock,” he mumbled, “And then I wake up and...”

I didn’t bother to answer, I just dropped my head down, taking him between my lips, and letting myself go. No more need to be subtle or sly.

“Where are we?” he asked vaguely. “Why is it cold?”

Then he moaned suddenly, his body stiffening, because I’d done something really fast and forceful with my tongue and stuck a finger up his ass. Then he winced, because that triggered his already sore stomach muscles.

“Oh I remember,” he said, when he could breathe again. He reached down, putting a finger on my forehead.

I lifted off.

“I love you,” he said.

“I know you do, Hon,” I replied. “But I’m in the middle of something here...This cock isn’t going to suck itself.”

I lowered my head, pushing down against his finger on my forehead to get to his cock.

“Let’s watch the sunrise together,” he whispered. “On the other side. Just holding you in my arms, and watching it.”

That stopped me. I lifted my head.

“You’re a romantic,” I told him. “You know that?”

The first night that we’d spent together, we hadn’t slept at all, we’d just spent the whole time making love and eventually, spent, had watched the sunrise from his window. But this?

Atop a tall building, the city spread out around us, dawn breaking felt glorious.

I toed the wine bottle. Empty.

“Anything left?” I asked.

He checked the cooler.

“Just the bottled water. You want some?”

“Yeah, let’s bring it with us.”

We got up, dragging our clothes and the loveseat cushions to the other side of the antenna platform. He settled back against a metal box, some part of the ventilation plant I think, and I cuddled up beside him, so that I could play with his cock. We watched the sky get brighter and brighter, the stars fading away as the sky turned from black to dark blue and then to lighter shades, the clouds seeming to glow, more textured and detailed than I normally remembered.

Near the horizon, low hanging clouds lit up in reds and golds. The buildings of the city came into sharper and sharper relief, seeming more and more solid and textured, an artifact of the low angle of the light, and the shadows they cast against each other.

“It’s beautiful,” I whispered as I slowly worked his cock, enjoying its heat and hardness in my hand, as the world unveiled itself before us.

“Yes,” he whispered, looking from me out to the horizon. I loved the feeling of his arm draped around me, the solidness and warmth of his body, the sheer physical presence of him, the calm that seemed to radiate from him. I felt this wave of tenderness come over me.

“I want to do something,” I told him. “I want to do something for you, as you watch the sunrise with me.”

I pulled myself up a little, so that I could look directly in his eyes.

“Let me do it, okay?”

I still had my grip on his cock, my hand wrapped tightly around it, so he knew what was coming. He stared into my eyes and nodded gravely.

“Okay.”

“And I want you to do something for me,” I said, looking grave and serious. “This is important. No games.”

“Yes?” he asked warily.

“I want you to let it happen,” I said. “Just let it. Don’t hold back. Get out of your head. Stop thinking of me or my needs or desires. Stop thinking. Just...accept it. Watch the sunrise for me, and enjoy the sensations. Let me do it, for you.”

I felt that I must sound a little bit crazy. But he just nodded.

“Okay.”

I moved around, folding my skirt over and over so that I could kneel on it. He spread his legs. I bent forward, hands on his thighs and took his cock in my mouth.

It had that special rigidity, that freshness that cocks had in the morning, shortly after waking. Before all the baggage of being a man, all the bullshit of the day started to catch up. Morning just after waking was when cocks were purest.

I kissed the head tenderly, and then just let my lips open, keeping it tight, my lips just wet enough to pass over his head, squeezing it as I went. My jaws parted, just barely enough to let him pass, squeezing again. And I kept my tongue flat, laying in wait until he fell into my trap.

Suddenly, I descended inches in a quick smooth movement, my tongue sprang, lashing out, curling and lapping against the back of his crown as I withdrew. A loud moan from him gratified me, as his body went rigid. If I could have grinned, I would have, I was so pleased. I went to work eagerly wrapping one hand around his scrotum, pulling his balls down, the fingernails of my other hand digging into his thigh.

He lasted only five minutes, and as I swallowed his come, drinking down each rope as it spurted hot and thick in my mouth, I thought to myself, he holds back, he always holds back, but not this time. This time, he just trusted me, and didn’t hold back. It made me deliriously happy.

Once I’d emptied him, I left his cock and crawled up to snuggle against him, making sure to keep a good hand around his deflating erection, just in case it tried something sneaky. He was still gasping, I could feel his muscles twitching uncontrollably under his skin, he was almost shaking.

Kissing his cheek, I snuggled against him. When he looked at me, his eyes were luminous. I smiled. This is what happens when you don’t hold back, I thought, when you just let go.

I looked out at the horizon.

“Oh look,” I said. “We still have plenty of dawn to enjoy together!”

He chuckled, and I giggled, the two of us just enjoying ourselves.

We watched it rise.

“Can I return the favour?” he offered.

I considered it. I was in a really happy accepting place, the sky was glorious. The idea of his face between my legs, his tongue lapping me was crazy tempting.

I shook my head. Don’t sacrifice for me, I thought.

“I want you to enjoy this too,” I said.

“I’ll enjoy it.”

I giggled.

“You know what I mean!” I paused. “I want us to watch this together. We can’t do that if your view is... pinker.”

“Ah,” Sam said, accepting. “It is my favourite view though.”

I snickered.

“Why don’t you do some magic with your fingers, while we watch the sunrise.”

“That works,” he said. “You’ll have to let go of my cock.”

“Oh pooh!” I complained and stuck my tongue out, but I let it go. Then we shifted around until I could throw one leg over his and get up where we could hold each other, but he could easily reach me. His fingers danced along my vulva, expertly finding and avoiding my clit, tapping and teasing, then dancing away. My lips seemed to part invitingly, and welcomed, his fingertips intruded, explored, then dived deep, bringing moans and shivers from me.

As he sent waves of pleasure though me, and I let my back arch, I thought about my advice to him, and decided to take it, deliberately letting go, forcing myself to not hold back, to release and surrender to his touch. I moaned, and then I moaned again, until it became impossible to think or concentrate on anything.

It wasn’t just his hand, his fingers. The heat of his body, the warmth of him, the feel of him against me, of my leg across him, the texture of his skin, all of it filled my awareness. The brilliant colours across the sky, the feel of sunlight warming my skin, the coolness and dampness of parts of me not exposed, it all came together in an exquisite sexual bath.

I moaned and the moan became a shout of joy, my body shook, trembled, felt like it was exploding, and then I squirted in breathless relief, like my orgasm was emptying me out. I’d never felt anything quite like it. And through it all, Sam held me loosely, offering no resistance, no constraint or constriction, only safety and protection. The orgasm coursed through me, and didn’t stop, I squirted again and again.

Finally, it passed, leaving me dizzy and elated.

“Wow,” I mumbled. Sam kissed me then, his timing perfect as always.

This is what it was, I thought, we didn’t think we had barriers. But we had them.

And with Leroy, because of Leroy, those barriers were breaking down harder and faster. It was exhilarating, and sometimes scary. But it was a good thing. Maybe it was harder for men, those barriers, those walls formed by a lifetime of masculine indoctrination. Maybe we had to work to break through them. Maybe Leroy was right.

“You know,” I said out of nowhere, staring at the sunrise, “I’m really looking forward to the cuck session.”

Sam looked at me, startled. Then he turned back to watch the sunrise. I watched him from the corner of his eye, I could almost see the wheels turning in his head. We were so close, sometimes it felt like we thought the same thoughts.

This felt almost like one of those times.

“It’s funny,” he said, “It was intense. I sort of am too. Maybe. I’m not sure I should. I’m a little nervous, but...it’s an experience.”

He sucked air between his teeth.

I kissed him on the cheek.

“Be afraid, be very afraid,” I teased him.

He laughed.

“Bring it on.”