Demon lord ch3 sketch p31-39
Added 2026-01-28 16:02:14 +0000 UTCI'm so sorry for the very late post this month and also the first post of this year so welcome to 2026. I struggle with how condense this down a bit one the first few pages. I want sketch to ten pages but on manage nine. So I think i'll cut off after Leo finishih his corruption and start coloring the first act. Don't worry I plan to immedietly continue until chapter 3 is finish.
Anyway thank you so much for your support this month and as alway if you want to fix my horrid grammar you can post it in the comment. I truly appariciate your help.
Comments
I always love to come and see the new works you've posted, great job, hope your year is going well so far with the end of January soon.
Corington
2026-01-29 06:04:18 +0000 UTCHappy new year and Happy drawing! As I missed that apparently patreon doesn't show comments unless fully logged in: here's to a separate full lookover ~ listed are phrases/excerpts with a change/fix/alternative/suggestion contained: P1 Panel1: - Keep your eyes on the enemy Panel3: - we’re totally screwed - So this is how being summoned feels like ~ alternatively: substitute ‘how’ with ‘what’ or: ‘so this is what it feels like to be summoned’ - So if I’m being summoned, That means …. - technically ‘Kaputt’ is written with double t, but ‘Kaput’ feels more appropriate as is, considering context Panel4: - … the armament of my previous incarnation P2 Panel2: - HMM, you’re right / … you are right - Relax gilda, We’ll have to reforge them anyway - I swear, It’s like listening to your old human self sometimes (alternatively: ‘… self at times’) Panel3: - … Queen of the Demons! Panel4: - I’ll have to ask you to put that back - Ho, It seems like our host ….. Panel5: - we are doomed - There’s no chance for us against the demon lord P3 Panel1: - the plan only needs one of us to escape and destroy the vault’s foundation (or ‘foundations’ ~ context wise, both singular and plural can make sense) - The rest of us will have to buy time for as long as possible ~ alternative: The rest of us will have to buy as much time as possible Panel3: - … even after all this time, my oath still stands - … Prince renald, your duty is absolutely crucial! Only royalty like you (or ‘a royal like you’) can achieve it ! ~ alternatively: ‘… crucial! (It’s /it is) something only royalty / a royal like you can achieve!’ Panel4: -we’ll leave it in your hands P4 Panel1: - I think we both know what the outcome is going to be ~ alternatively: ‘ I think we both know what will be the outcome (of this)’ Panel2: - indeed, but perhaps the fair queen of demons could grace us with some handycap (alternatively: ‘a handicap’ ) Panel3: - … A Battle against overwhelming opponents, with no hope of victory (depending on the colon, the meaning inverts; without the colon ‘overwhelming opponents with no hope of victory’ comes together to mean that the opponents have no hope of victory, instead of referring to the battle) ~ if the demon queen refers to herself as the overwhelming opponent (what the context appears to imply), then it would be: ‘ … A battle against an overwhelming opponent, with no hope of victory? - I couldn’t think of anything more dull Panel4: - How about I grant you a one on one duel, human? - ‘… only use my strength, No magic Mumbo Jumbo‘ or potentially: ‘ … only use my strength! No Magic Mumbo Jumbo!’ Panel5: - Now let’s see what you’re made of P5 Panel2: - ‘Still, Such flimsy steel ‘ alternatively: ‘ Still, such a flimsy piece of steel’ Panel3: - Humans are too fragile Panel4: - Hmm, perhaps I can make you stronger. (potentially omit the ‘.’ At the end for flow of text) P6 Panel1: - ‘ cough! ‘ for the sound effect of coughing; unless the intention is to state that she’s been caught, in which case ‘caught you! ‘ could work - We’re going to (re)forge it using a human as (the) base Panel3: - Let’s see the power of the so called ‘living armament’ - ‘ … if the memory of my previous incarnation is true ‘ or, in case of plural; both work: ‘ If the memories of my previous incarnation are true’ - You might be able to slay me before fully turning into a demon Panel4: - Cough! Panel5: - ‘…Cocky, Queen of Demons! ‘ P7 P8 Panel2: - If you guys want to join in…. Panel4: - works as is. potentially: ‘ patience, Robard(.) We must wait for (an) opportunity …’ - That’s right! Just be a good boy and watch Leo become one of us~ Panel5: - Now that should spice things up a bit (- optionally: ‘Gilda, hand me some sword’, but ‘grab’ works well in the context) P9 Panel1: - … empowering your opponent in the middle of (the / a) battle - your arrogance knows no bounds O Queen Panel2: - … Ballad … Panel3: - tough talk(.) ~ potentially: omit the point for sake of text flow into next panel, optionally together with placing ‘..’ in front in panel4 Panel4: - (..)For a mere Blade!
Deafi
2026-01-28 20:58:34 +0000 UTCMister Ibenz sure knows how to fill our year start with suspense and excitement 😲
Alexis Ortiz
2026-01-28 19:12:04 +0000 UTCP32: I think, the "You might break the artifaaahh--!!" feels better here. Gilda starts saying Artifact but interrupts it with a scream, as it breaks. [Why does she switch to Goddess here. Has she been called a goddess before?] -> gilda called the DemonLord Goddes in some of comics, where she created additional demons.
Marius8
2026-01-28 18:13:39 +0000 UTCHappy belated New Year. Format: Original quote ↴ Modified quote with [notes] ↴ Modified quote without notes. Notes shown in [square brackets] Multiple possible modifications shown in {curly brackets / braces} ―――――――――― [Page 31] "Hahaha, who would have thought. Punching my asshole uncle would eventually lead me to facing the goddam Demon Lord." ↴ “Hahaha, who would’ve thought. Punching my asshole uncle would eventually lead to me facing the goddamn Demon Lord.” "Me and my damn mouth...." "Focus, Robard. Keep your eye on enemies." ↴ “Focus, Robard. Keep your eyes on the enemy.” [Here ‘the enemy’ refers to the entire collective of all enemies.”] ↴ “Focus, Robard. Keep your eyes on the enemy.” "Demons can feed on your fear." "An archdemon and now the Demon Lord, huh." "I don't want to admit it but..." "We're totally scew." ↴ “We’re totally screwed.” [If one is in the state of verb, say, ‘drench’, you use the past tense form. ‘They’re drenched’, not ‘they’re drench’.] ↴ “We’re totally screwed.” "Hmmm, so this is how being summoned feel like." ↴ “Hmmm, so this is how being summoned feels like.” "You've done well, Gilda"↴ “You’ve done well, Gilda.” "Heh heh, welcome to Saint Prisilia Fortress, My Queen!" "So if I'm being summoned. That mean we're going with my plan then." ↴ “So, if I’m being summoned, I suppose that means we’re going with my plan then.” "Yep! My plan is all kaput! Operation Brute Force is in effect!" ↴ “Yep! My plan went kaput! Operation Brute Force is in effect!” "So this is what we are after..." ↴ “So, this is what we’re after…” "The armament of my previous incarnatation." ↴ “The armament of my previous incarnation.” "Hmmm, bothersome ward." "My Queen, be careful!" [Page 32] "You might break the artifaaahh--!!" ↴ “You might break the arti—Aah!!” "Hmf!" ↴ “Hmmf!” "Hmm, you right. It's almost falling apart here." ↴ “Hmm, you’re right. It’s practically [The semantical difference between ‘almost’ and ‘practically’ is hard to state but simply put ‘practically’ would be the more common word to use here.] falling apart here.” ↴ “Hmm, you’re right. It’s practically falling apart here.” "Awawa~! Goddesss, we're lucky this time. So I implore you. Please don't try that on the other pieces!" ↴ “Awawa~! {Goddesses/My Queen/Mistress/Milady}, [Why does she switch to Goddess here. Has she been called a goddess before? After all, a goddess implies some level of divinity. Anyway, regardless of whether you stick with it or not, there’s a cornucopia of other words you could pick from] you got lucky this time. I implore you, please don’t try that on the other pieces.” ↴ “Awawa~! {Goddesses/My Queen/Mistress/Milady}, you got lucky this time. I implore you, please don’t try that on the other pieces.” "Relax, Gilda. We'll have to reforged them anyway." ↴ “Relax, Gilda. We’ll have to reforge them anyway.” "I swear, it's like listen to your old human self sometime." ↴ “I swear, it’s like listening to your old human self sometimes.” "Hail, fair Queen of the Demon!" ↴ “Hail, fair Queen of the Demons!” [‘Demon’ is countable.] ↴ “Hail, fair Queen of the Demons!” "I'll have to ask you put that back." "Ho, it seem like our host finally found his tongue." ↴ “Ho, it seems like our host finally found his tongue.” "We are doom." ↴ “We are doomed.” "There's no chance for us again the Demon Lord." ↴ “There’s no chance for us against the Demon Lord.” [Page 33] "The plan need one of us to escape and destroy the vault's fondation." ↴ “The plan just needs one of us to escape and destroy the vault’s foundation.” "The rest of us will have have to but time as long as possible." ↴ “The rest of us will have to buy time for as long as possible.” "We'll bury the entire vault along with the Demon Lord." "That's quite morbid, Varlic." "I see no other option." "Dammit okay... So who's the lucky person?" ↴ “Dammit. Okay… so, who’s the lucky person?” "Prince Renald, you will escape as soon as you find the opputunity." ↴ “Prince Renald, you will escape as soon as you find the opportunity.” "What!? Why me, sir!?" "We can't let our rookie die on their first week!" "Well, you are also the weakest fighter in our team, no offense." ↴ “Well, you’re also the weakest fighter in our team. No offense.” "Young prince., I swear to serve the Goddess and the Crowd. Even after all this time my oath still stand." ↴ “Young prince, I swore to serve the Goddess and the Crown. Even after all this time, my oath still stands.” "Ha! Prince Renald you duty is utmost crucial! Only a royalty like you can achieve!" ↴ “Ha! Prince Renald, your duty is of the utmost importance [‘utmost’ and ‘crucial’ are redundant.]! Only a royal [‘royalty’ is the status of ‘royal’] like you can achieve this!” ↴ “Ha! Prince Renald, your duty is of the utmost importance! Only a royal like you can achieve this!” "We'll leave it in your hand." ↴ “We’ll leave this in your hands.” "Come on, don't look so down." "Hey, Renald wanna see something cool?" "Don't tell Robard." "It's funnier to let him think I'm a delusiobal elf wannabe." ↴ “It’s funnier to let him think I’m a delusional elf wannabe.” [Page 34] "Tsk tsk, five paladins again me?" ↴ “Tsk, tsk. Five paladins against me?” "Hush, Gida"↴ “Hush, Gilda.” "I think we both know what outcome is going to be." ↴ “I think we both know what the outcome is going to be.” "Indeed, but perhap the fair Queen of Demon could grace us with some handicap." ↴ “Indeed, but mayhap [‘perhap’ is a valid, if obsolete form of ‘perhaps’. Now given the rest of the speech, I’m taking this as an attempt at old formal English, in which case ‘mayhap’ is less likely to read as a typo.] the fair Queen of Demons grace us with an even playing field? [So, bit bigger of change. A ‘handicap’ is a detriment to one or more persons. But the way the sentence is phrased, it almost sounds like the humans are asking for a handicap, rather than asking the Demon Lord to impose one on herself.]” ↴ “Indeed, but mayhap the fair Queen of Demons grace us with an even playing field?” "Hmm, a battle again overhelming opponent with no hope of victory?" ↴ “Hmm, a battle against an overwhelming opponent with no hope of victory?” "Couldn't think of anything more dulls." ↴ “Couldn’t think of anything duller.” "How about I grant you an one on one duel, human?" ↴ “How about I grant you a one-on-one duel, human?” "Goddess!? Not again~" ↴ “{Goddesses/My Queen/Mistress/Milady}!? Not again~” "I'll even only use my strengh no magic mumbo jumbo!" ↴ “I’ll even only use my strength. No magic mumbo-jumbo!” "Now let's see what you made of." ↴ “Now, let’s see what you’re made of.” [Page 35] "That might not be enough!" "Gah!" "Not bad. I see you're a skilled warrior." "Still such a flimsy steel." ↴ “Still, such flimsy steel.” "This won't do at all. Even if I just limit myself to only use my physical strenght." ↴ “This won’t do at all. Even if I limit myself to only using my physical strength.” "Human are too fragile." ↴ “Humans are too fragile.” "Seriously?" "Without a Holy Sword you all crumble like sand." ↴ “Without a Holy Sword, you all crumble like dust.” "Hmm, perhap I can make you stronger." ↴ “Hmm, perhaps I can make you stronger.” "!?" "Forge you into something more ... resilient." ↴ “Forge you into something more… resilient.” [Page 36] "Do you know how we plan to reforge my blade from this scrap?" ↴ “Do you know how we plan on reforging my blade from this scrap?” "Cought!" ↴ “Cough!” [Let’s take a brief tangent into English word endings and how to identify the differences in future. You seem to have confused yourself between the two common endings: -ough (note the ‘o’ at the start), and -ught (note the lack of ‘o’). Words that end in a /f/ sound (e.g., enough, rough, tough) end in -ough. This is also true for words that end in ‘o’ or ‘u’ sound (e.g., thorough [meaning extensive], through [meaning from one side to the other], though [meaning ‘despite’]). On the other hand, if the word ends in a hard /:t/ sound (e.g., taught, caught, sought, thought), then it ends in -ught. ‘Cough’, having a soft /f/ ending, ends in -ough.] ↴ “Cough!” "We're going to forge it using human as base." ↴ “We’re going to forge it using a human as the base.” "And fprging a living arament hyrid." ↴ “And forge a living armament hybrid.” "Let's see the power of so call living armament." ↴ “Let’s see the power of a so-called living armament.” "GAAAAAAAAJ!" "Ha! If the memory of my preveous incarnation are true." ↴ “Ha! If the memories of my previous incarnation are true,” "You might be able to slay me before fully turn into a demon." ↴ “you might be able to slay me before fully turning into a demon.” "Ha...Ha... Cought! Don't get too..." ↴ “Ha… Ha… Cough. Don’t get too…” "…Cocky Queen of Demon!" ↴ “…Cocky, Queen of Demons!” [Page 37] "Ho?" "Wha...?" "My hand?" "Ha ha ha, shit..." [Page 38] "Leo!" "Ah ah ah, remember? One on one duel~"↴ “Ah ah ah, remember? One-on-one duel~” "If you guy want to join in you have to wait for your turn~𝅘𝅥𝅮"↴ “If you guys want to join in, you’ll have to wait your turn~ 𝅘𝅥𝅮” "Or do you prefer a team death match again both me and my Goddess?" ↴ “Or would you prefer a team deathmatch against both me and {My Goddesses/My Queen/My Mistress/Milady}.” "Patience, Robard We must wait for opportunity to present itself." ↴ “Patience, Robard. We must wait for opportunity to present itself.” "That right! Just be good boy and watch Leo becoming one of us~"↴ “That’s right! Just be a good boy and watch Leo become one of us~” "Now that should spice thing up a bit." "Shall we continue?" "My future blade." "Gilda, grab me some sword." ↴ “Gilda, grab me a [She means a random sword. Singular, so ‘a’. ‘Some’ would be used if she wanted several random swords.] sword.” ↴ “Gilda, grab me a sword.” "Okie dokie." ↴ “Okey-dokey.” [Page 39] "Hah! Hah! Empowering you opponent in middle of the battle..." ↴ “Hah! Hah! Empowering your opponent in the middle of battle…” "You arrogant know no bound O'Queen." ↴ “Your arrogance knows no bounds, O’Queen of Demons.” "I'll make you regret this." "For this too shall nothing but a part of my epic ballard for the bard to sign." ↴ “For this too shall be but a part the epic ballad the bards will sing.” [Bit more of an intrusive change, meaning’s more or less the same, but now in the slightly old-formal style used earlier.” "Tought talk." ↴ “Tough talk.” [‘Tough’: hard. ‘Thought’: an image in one’s head. ‘Though’: ‘despite’. ‘Tought’: not a word.] ↴ “Though talk.” "For a mere blade!" "Gah!"
trigger_portal_cleanser
2026-01-28 17:31:59 +0000 UTCVery nice! My suggestions: generally: "queen of demon(s)" sounds to me like a very noble, respectful way to address her. I think as human you'd much rather address her as "demon queen", which sounds more deprecating - unless they do revere her in some way? page 1: keep your eyes on [the] enemies we're totally screw[ed]. so this is [what] being summoned feel[s] like that mean[s] we're going with the armament of my previous [incarnation]. (isn't Gilda usually referring to her as 'her goddess', not as 'her queen'?) page 2: we [were] lucky this time we'll have to reforge[] them anyway. it's like listen[ing] to your old fair queen of the demon[s]! we are doom[ed]. no chance for us again[st] the demon lord page 3: only need[s] one of us we can't let our rookie die [in his] first week my oath still stand[s] prince renald[,] you[r] duty is utmost [important]. [one only a royal like you can do!] we'll leave it in your hand[s] I'm a delusio[n]al elf page 4: five paladins again[st] me? know what [the] outcome is going to be but perhap[s] the fair queen of demon[s] a battle again[st an] over[w]helming opponent couldn't think of anything more dull[]. my strength[,] no magic mumbo jumbo! what you [are] made of page 5: still[,] such [] flimsy steel. human[s] are too fragile. perhap[s] I can page 6: we're going [to] forge it using [a] human as base and [forging] a living armament hy[b]rid. the power of [this] so[-]call[ed] if the memor[ies] of my prev[]ious incarnation before fully turn[ing] into a demon cough[] cocky queen of demon[s]! page 8: if you guy[s] want to join in you['ll] have to match again[st] both me wait for [an] opportunity that['s] right! just be [a] good boy and watch leo becom[]ing one of us spice thing[s] up a bit grab me [a] sword page 9: your arrogan[ce] know[s] no bound[s] my epic balla[]d tough[] talk
Nepisa
2026-01-28 16:50:29 +0000 UTCthanks to you!
Wayne Chen
2026-01-28 16:29:15 +0000 UTCa good first post for 2026
ChaosOverlordZ
2026-01-28 16:21:25 +0000 UTCDamn, they're amazing fighters! On the one hand, the transformations look amazing so far! But on the other, they're so loyal to the prince that it makes me kinda sad that they're getting corrupted... :(
Taaffeite-Art
2026-01-28 16:20:27 +0000 UTCnice
Mantarok1205
2026-01-28 16:17:50 +0000 UTCOh this getting really good!
StarGazer
2026-01-28 16:15:34 +0000 UTC
