Demon lord sketch 3-5
Added 2020-10-27 18:08:43 +0000 UTCNext sketch is here. I decided to name new Gilbert as Gilda.
Not sure how many page this part will be hope it not become too long.
As always if you want to help fix my poor understanding of english. You can tell me in the comment
Comments
Ok so then, i hope Aira dos fight the transformation. I think she would have be mind broken, perhaps lose her past self? Maybe ask to be able to collect soemeone from the past? Now then... so the DEmon Lord is a being of collective memories? Mm well that works. Scould see that on how to make the heros could win. Also why not have it so she ends up getting a complete fusion of all the old demon lords memories and Hero's? Like a brand new person? Not a demon lord trying to keep control over the body? Also i think the Demon lod could be called Demon Gqueen since Lord is normally used for a male. Grammar help. Page 3: Last Panel. Aira should say "This girl.... No. this "thing" wasn't kidding. She just barely suppressed her urge." Page 5: Second Panel, top right: "Are you Hero or just the Demon Lord using his body?" Page 5, Panel 3. Second from the top right. "I'm just the collective will of demons wanting a leader." Second to botton panel, on the left. "But if you really want to know. A small part of me is "Hero" which was mixed into the many generations of my Demon Lord memories" Second to bottom panel, Right: "It's still kind of hard to be the dominate ego, having to keep my guard up or i will be drowning in the sea of chaos in my mind."
Nightmare49
2020-10-28 05:01:23 +0000 UTCi thought that crack was her skin, about to split open for her mouth.
Nightmare49
2020-10-28 04:58:09 +0000 UTC5.2.1 ... Or is he truly gone? / ... Or have you consumed his soul as well? 5.3.2 I'm a manifestation of the collective demonic will to have a leader. 5.4.1 If you really must know, some part of Hero remains, but he is merely one among untold generations of Demon Lords that make up the "me" you see before you. 5.4.2 Truthfully, Aria, I'm having difficulty holding onto any part of myself. It's all I can do to not simply drown in the ocean of chaos inside my mind. 5.5.2 After all, today is your special day. / After all, today you are the star of the show.
Asani
2020-10-28 01:44:57 +0000 UTC4.1.1 Gilda, have you been enjoying yourself with dear, sweet Aria? I trust she's still in one piece. Has the ritual been prepared? 4.1.2 ...everything is as you requested. 4.1.3 {use smaller text to indicate Aria asking it in the background to no-one in particular} 4.2.1 Good. It would be rude to keep our guest waiting. 4.2.3 How was your slumber? My apologies for the strength of the spell. (I find it’s best to err on the side of caution.)
Asani
2020-10-28 01:44:47 +0000 UTCI always seem to end up tweaking a word here or there after I post these, but this should suffice for now. Last edit: 2020-10-28 01:00 PST 3.1 There there, Aria, don't fret. I thought you were cute even before Goddess remade me. 3.2.1 Hmm, there's something different about your scent though. Is this [fear / what fear smells like]? Exquisite. 3.2.2 ...took a little bite, would she? 3.3.1 take => stand 3.3.2 Don't worry, Aria, I won't [nibble on / gobble up] anything vital, heh heh 3.4.1 gigle => giggle Kidding! *giggle* I just felt like teasing you a little. 3.4.2 We have something special planned for you, and I wouldn't dream of damaging Goddess's [new / next] servant. 3.4.3 Ahh don't be mad Aria, I'm sorry for scaring you, heh heh 3.4.4 No this girl, this "thing", definitely wasn't kidding. I'm safe only because she is suppressing her urges(, for now).
Asani
2020-10-28 01:44:35 +0000 UTCDemon Lord looking swagalicious in that cape... and Gilda looking scary AF with that gaping maw tease. Love it all! Big surprise, I know. I have trouble holding onto continuity of personality in the face of such radical transformations, and sounds like others do as well. I endeavored to lean slightly more in that direction with my edits, but it's difficult with limited dialog and the main focus being on the ritual to come. That's not really a criticism of the story structure, at least from my perspective. I'm rolling with the interpretation that Hero is able to hold his head above the metaphorical water only because he is going along with the gestalt's desire to convert his (former) friends into demonic minions.
Asani
2020-10-28 01:44:24 +0000 UTCI mean she still is technically Gilbert with his entire being and personality modified.
ibenz009
2020-10-27 21:15:53 +0000 UTCIs that close up of Gildas mouth in panel 3 supposed to show like demon teeth? I think the *crack* sound effect implies that her mouth can open way bigger than it's current form, which is cool. Love to see more of this! And there's a ritual now? Is Aria going to turn into a demon physically before she does so mentally or vice versa? Camt wait to find out!
A. H. W.
2020-10-27 21:07:34 +0000 UTCHmmm Interesting bit about she saying how its hard for hero demonlord to keep her Ego, What if before transforming Aria she asks if Aria would be willing to help her maintain it by always being by her side and never letting her forget who she was.
Gustavo Tani
2020-10-27 20:51:55 +0000 UTCBit of an idea for Aria's transformation, if you don't already have it planned out. Feel free to discard or incorporate as you see fit: — Demon Lord returns Aria's staff to her, CLAIMING that she's willing to give her a fighting chance. (She's lying, of course.) — Aria relaxes fractionally, mistaking this as the Hero still trying to "fight back" against the DL's influence – which DL takes advantage of, shoving a Demon Seed down Aria's throat before knocking her into a pool-slash-portal of living shadow. — Aria flails inside the shadow for a brief moment (much like anyone who's ever accidentally fallen into a swimming pool), then manages to right herself and resurface. — Breaking the surface of the shadow, Aria doesn't even realize yet that she's already been fully transformed – in her panic and brief moment of sensory deprivation while in the shadow, she completely failed to notice the darkness spreading throughout her body and soul. Once this is pointed out to her, though – seeing her reflection, realizing that she's no longer holding her staff even though she can still feel her connection to it (it's been merged into her new demon body to become her tail), DL actually speaking up about her new look, whatever – because the transformation has already completed, Aria realizes she can't even find it in herself to protest, and just accepts it.
Benjamin Lawton
2020-10-27 19:12:39 +0000 UTCWell hero got like 3 page before corruption. He barely a character in part 1 to be honest. Demon lord at first supposed to be 4-5 page tf sequence. I feel like to creat powerful demon the ritual is required and Gilbert tf kinda like crude on the spot transform.
ibenz009
2020-10-27 18:56:43 +0000 UTCHmmmm so Hero is just one of many minds in lodged in the Demon lord’s essence, I’m not sure how I feel about that, it kinda makes Hero as a character feel unimportant like a blank slate to me. I still think it’s a bit weird that The demon lord doesn’t change Aria right away like she did with Gilbert. I am just speaking my own opinion/mind and I’m not trying to change your mind on how you do this mini comic, you do you man but yeah I definitely feel a bit conflicted on this so far, it sorta feels more like a soft reboot of part one then a direct sequel to it.
MagicCobra911
2020-10-27 18:42:31 +0000 UTCGilda should be grateful to Gilbert as it thanks to his screw up that she even exists. Though also makes me wonder if the church allowed Gilbert to join the Hero’s party knowing this would happen. Basically they knew Gilbert would screw up at the very end thus they are actually in on prolonging the Demon Lord cycle..
Milton Romero
2020-10-27 18:32:55 +0000 UTCOh wow, love how this is turning out.
StarGazer
2020-10-27 18:15:38 +0000 UTCAh!~ i love that beautiful shot of the Demon Lord in all her glory! It’ll be amazing once it’s colored, I just know it!~ (but all your art is amazing anyways XD) Anywho, I did see one error... “How was your sleep Aria? Sorry if my spell was too strong.” it just doesn’t flow right without the Was to help enhance the sentence
Rökkr Ragnarok
2020-10-27 18:13:30 +0000 UTC
