I'm sure many of you know I do not share much about my personal life online however I feel more comfortable sharing here amongst my true supporters than on my social media sites. Life has not been so good to me lately so I have almost completely stopped my social media interactions but I am trying my best to still stay active on here. I was getting ready to start a certification course in June (put the deposit down and everything) to start a small career for myself while continuing to model to supplement things until the business got going and I got approved for an apartment which I would move into in August and use my spare bedroom to run my new business. Everything seemed to be aligning perfectly and I knew it would be a challenge and financially tough but I was ready! Then while on tour my car was broken into and I had $5,000 plus my brand new laptop amongst other things. I was crushed. That was all the money I was going to use for my course.  And before you say it, I know carrying that much cash is a bad idea of course but I had no choice as I had just cancelled an account with Wells Fargo due to their horrible customer service and did not have the chance to get my new account set up before my trip. ANYWAYS that whole experience was devastating to me, now I don't know when I will be able to take that course and open the next chapter to my life which just breaks my heart. THEN I get a call from my Mom in California saying I needed to come home ASAP to deal with a family emergency which I don't care to go into detail about but has been extremely hard on me and my family. I had to cancel my next tour because of it which meant I lost out on thousands of dollars which after the last mishap was much needed but family will always come first. Now I am finally going home on Friday to try and pick up the pieces of my broken life. I don't know where to start. I struggle with crippling anxiety as well as depression which I have managed well for years but lately I can't seem to get a hold of myself. If I am doing something it becomes more manageable but the second I am idle or alone it just overwhelms me. I try not to use that as an excuse but it is a scary reality for me. I am trying to take things one day at a time but it is difficult not to look at the big picture and how everything came crashing down. I know at this point I am just rambling but this is the place I feel safe to share my issues and my story and it feels good to get it off my chest. Thank you for listening and as always thank you for your continued support.