[#206] Toasting Marshmallow

A rare moment of lucidity.  I wasn't sure what brought it on, but I felt the fog lift, the burning lust in my diaper finally subside.  It was constant, maddening.  I had taken to humping furniture lately in an attempt to get enough friction to please myself.  My cheeks burned bright at the realization, how far I had fallen.  I looked down at myself - a sleeveless top, a thick pink diaper, shoes with no pants...  I pressed my fingers against the pink padding between my legs.

Wet.  Soaking wet.  When was the last time I was even changed?

What day was it?  How long had I been here?

I didn't know long this clarity would last.  I had to escape.  It could be now or never.

~~~

I made my way to the door wall, to the mere sight of freedom, of the outdoors untethered from another. It was close enough to hear the squirrels scampering, to almost smell the grass beyond the glass, glistening and fresh and damp. Damp like me. And just as the grass couldn't get up and leave the yard, I too was bound by some inexorable force to never leave this house.

~~~

It wasn't fair!  I was so close!  I could think straight, I could remember my name, I could remember my LIFE.  Before I was brought here, before this collar, before the diapers.  I had been a party girl and it had been my downfall.

I could think.

That meant there was some hope - normally I couldn't even manage that, I vaguely recalled wandering around the house with my tongue hanging out... waiting for something to fill my mouth.

I shuddered at the thought.  Whenever I reached for the door, it was like a thousand bees were buzzing around inside my skull.  It was deafening, debilitating.  Painful.

I dropped my hands to my side and took a deep breath.  I relaxed, letting my limbs hang loose...

...before springing into action and yanking the door open in one swift motion.

~~~

The freshness of the air felt almost cloying compared to the constant haze that hung around me, the funk of pee and powder, the perfume that became associated with every breath I took. I could feel my brain opening up, waking up in ways it hadn't been able to in an eternity. How long had I been here? How long had it been since I'd been outside? The muted sounds of temptation were now loud, deafening, unfiltered, and I dithered. I paused. I longed for freedom, and yet..

~~~

The haze was descending already.  Sweet freedom so close, but my body didn't want it.

I wanted it.

"No!"  I screamed aloud as I felt my body sinking to the floor, to my knees.

"Marshmallow!"

My name.  Not my name!  My owner.  My kidnapper!  Desire.  Run!!!

"Marshmallow!  Here girl!"

So close.  It was so close!  My face was wet with tears as I bounded away from the door, dropping at my owner's feet, wrapping my arms around her leg and...

Oh god.

No.

"No!"  I sobbed one short, choking sob as my hips began to move, grinding the wet diaper against her leg.  Humping her with uncontrollable thirst.  "I wuv you!"

~~~

"I love you, too, precious. And it's because I love you that I need to take you back to the Dolly Training Works, because you opened the backdoor. Don't worry, Marshmallow, by the time you get back... well, all those intrusive unhelpful thoughts will be memories you don't have anymore. Then I'll be able to take you to the park to play, won't that be lovely?"